A Marriage to Remember is a short documentary by Banker White, which explores the impact of Alzheimer’s disease on his parents’ marriage. The documentary, produced by Banker White and Anna Fitch, follows his mother Pam’s decline and the challenges her father, Ed, faces as he transitions from a model and actress to a caregiver. The documentary highlights the strength of the marriage and the challenges faced by the couple as they navigate the challenges of Alzheimer’s disease.
The documentary is a starkly intimate look into the life of Pam White, who has been diagnosed with early-onset Alzheimer’s disease at the age of 61. The documentary also follows a husband, Ed, who has been caring for his wife over the course of four years, looking after her. The documentary highlights the strength of the marriage and the challenges faced by the couple as they navigate the challenges of Alzheimer’s disease.
📹 A Marriage to Remember | Alzheimer’s Disease Documentary | Op-Docs | The New York Times
In this short documentary, the filmmaker Banker White explores how Alzheimer’s disease has revealed the strength of his parents’ …
What is the love story movie about Alzheimer’s?
The Eternal Memory is up for an Oscar for Best Documentary Feature. The film is about a Chilean couple, journalist Augusto Góngora and actress Paulina Urrutia, who stay married for 20 years after Augusto is diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease. We spoke with Paulina about her love story and life with Augusto, who died of Alzheimer’s in 2023. Paulina, how did you and Augusto meet? We met in 1996. Augusto came to see me in a play. He knew the director and wanted to meet me. I couldn’t believe it. When he told me it was true, I said, “Oh, how ridiculous!” The next day, he called my colleague to ask for my number. The next day he called me. That’s how it started. You and Augusto were together for over 25 years. What did you notice about Augusto? He was very active. He had a job and was developing a new project for Chilean public television. He started forgetting things.
Is there a link between COVID and dementia?
The researchers found that the risk of developing dementia after a SARS-CoV-2 infection was higher at one year than at three or six months. This suggests that dementia is one of the long-term consequences of SARS-CoV-2 infections. The subgroup analyses also showed that women were more likely to develop Alzheimer’s disease and all-cause dementia than men, regardless of whether they had been infected with the virus. Older adults with more severe COVID-19 were more likely to develop dementia. However, the definition of severe COVID-19 varied across studies.
Conclusions: The findings showed that adults over 60 who had COVID-19 were more likely to develop dementia than those who did not have the virus. However, the risk was similar to that of other respiratory infections. The risk of new-onset dementia was found to be one of the long-term effects of COVID-19.
What is the movie where the wife has Alzheimer’s?
Away from Her is a film about a husband’s decision when his wife is diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease. Alzheimer’s disease affects millions worldwide. It is a disease that makes it harder to remember, think, and do everyday things.
Living with Alzheimer’s can be hard, but movies often handle this topic well. Some movies about Alzheimer’s disease include:
Can COVID cause Alzheimer’s disease?
Abstract: Some think Alzheimer’s is caused by a virus. It is not known if the virus that causes COVID-19 increases the risk of Alzheimer’s disease. In this study of 6,245,282 older adults (age ≥65 years) who had medical encounters between February 2020 and May 2021, we found that people with COVID-19 were at a higher risk for a new diagnosis of Alzheimer’s disease within 360 days after the initial diagnosis. This risk was especially high in people age ≥85 years and in women. We need to study how COVID-19 affects Alzheimer’s disease and keep an eye on it in the long term. Keywords: Alzheimer’s disease; COVID-19; electronic health records; viral causes.
How likely are people with and without COVID-19 to be diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease in the next 180 days? The COVID-19 cohort includes older adults (age ≥65) who contracted the virus between February and May 2021. Non-COVID-19 cohort: older adults (≥65) with no documented COVID-19 in their EHRs but with medical encounters between 2/2020–5/2021. The two groups were matched for age, gender, race/ethnicity, socioeconomic factors, and Alzheimer’s disease-related comorbidities and behaviors.
What romantic movie does the wife have Alzheimer’s?
The Notebook is a love story based on a Nicholas Sparks novel. Ryan Gosling and Rachel McAdams play Noah and Allie, a couple whose love is tested when Allie is diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. Alzheimer’s disease affects millions worldwide. It is a disease that makes it harder to remember, think, and do everyday things.
Living with Alzheimer’s can be hard, but movies often deal with this topic well. Some movies about Alzheimer’s disease include:
Does all dementia turn into Alzheimer’s?
Alzheimer’s disease is a specific disease, while dementia is a general term for a group of similar diseases. Alzheimer’s is one of these. Every case of Alzheimer’s is an example of dementia, but not every type of dementia is Alzheimer’s.
Memory loss, thinking, problem-solving, language, mood, behavior. The symptoms for Alzheimer’s disease overlap with other types of dementia, but there can be differences.
What movie is about wife getting Alzheimer’s?
A linguistics professor and her family are tested when she is diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease. Still Alice is about a Columbia cognitive psychologist with early-onset Alzheimer’s disease, played by Julianne Moore. In my opinion, this was her best performance. Kristen Stewart and Alec Baldwin also do well. Stewart doesn’t look like a vampire anymore.
What is the Netflix movie about Alzheimer’s disease?
A professor with early-onset Alzheimer’s disease faces the pain of losing herself while trying to live and love her family. Watch it if you want. This title isn’t available in your country. A professor with early-onset Alzheimer’s disease faces the pain of losing her sense of self while trying to live and love her family. Starring: Julianne Moore, Alec Baldwin, Kristen Stewart.
What is the HBO documentary about Alzheimer’s?
A collection of documentaries about Alzheimer’s disease. A collection of documentaries about Alzheimer’s disease. This title isn’t available in your country.
: A collection of documentaries about Alzheimer’s disease. The Alzheimers Project (HBO): A collection of documentaries about Alzheimer’s disease.
What is the difference between Alzheimer’s and dementia?
Dementia is a general term for a range of symptoms affecting cognitive abilities. Alzheimer’s disease is a specific type of dementia characterized by progressive memory loss and cognitive decline. Other types of dementia exist, each with its own causes and characteristics. What are other causes of dementia? Alzheimer’s disease is the most common cause of dementia, but there are others, including vascular dementia, Lewy body dementia, and frontotemporal dementia (FTD). Vascular dementia is the second most common cause of dementia. It happens when the brain doesn’t get enough blood. This is usually because of small strokes or other problems with the blood vessels. Damage to the brain from these blood flow problems leads to cognitive impairment. Lewy body dementia is characterized by abnormal protein deposits in the brain. It has some symptoms in common with Alzheimer’s and Parkinson’s diseases, including memory loss, seeing things that aren’t there, changes in alertness, and problems with movement. Frontotemporal dementia (FTD) is a group of disorders caused by the deterioration of the frontal and temporal lobes of the brain. FTD affects personality, behavior, and language. It can cause changes in social behavior, impulsivity, language difficulties, and problems with thinking. Mixed dementia is a combination of different types of dementia, typically Alzheimer’s disease and vascular dementia. Mixed dementia is common in older adults. Having more than one type of dementia makes it harder to understand and treat the condition.
Does dementia turn into Alzheimer’s?
This is the most common type of dementia. About 60% to 80% of people with dementia have Alzheimer’s. It gets worse over time and usually affects people over 65. There is no cure.
It happens when proteins and fibers build up in your brain and block nerve signals and destroy nerve cells. Memory loss may start out mild but gets worse over time.
Forgetfulness, trouble concentrating, changes in personality, mood swings, depression, poor judgment, confusion.
Does COVID make Alzheimer’s worse?
Does Covid make dementia worse? Coronavirus can make dementia worse. Rehab can help some abilities, but some will always be lost.
4. Reducing the risk of Covid for someone with dementia. Coronavirus is still around, and new versions of it are emerging. It’s still important for people with dementia to stay safe and avoid risks.
Vaccines. The best way to protect yourself from Covid is to get the vaccine. People who have had the vaccine are less likely to get seriously ill from coronavirus. Vaccines also help stop you from spreading the virus. We have more information about Covid vaccines for people with dementia.
📹 Malcolm and Barbara: Love’s Farewell (Alzheimer’s Documentary) | Real Stories
A talented composer, husband & father, Malcolm Pointon was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. Barbara, his wife, could only look on as …
My partner had cancer and he was just bones. One day I was putting him into th bathtub to wash him and I remember him just saying to me. “Thank you for staying and taking care of me” and I said of course, besides where would I go, your my whole world. He replied. “Most people would leave”. That broke my heart to even think about. I never ever considered doing anything other than getting him the best care and being as supportive as I could possibly be supportive. Life changes but true love does not. He left this world but he left all the wonderful qualities he had with me. I had a horrible child hood and he showed me what a beautiful and wonderful place life and the world really are. He took all of the hurt and pain I ever experienced completely away and showed me that love really does conquer all.
True lovers aren’t the ones that fix the things in the house that need to be fixed, they aren’t the ones that go to the gym and bench press 300lbs, they aren’t the ones that assert their dominance, they’re the ed’s who step up for the pam’s even when the pam’s can’t say thank you for it. They are patient, even when they can’t be patient for one more second. They are understanding of what life throws at them, and they are willing to do anything for the people they love even when the people they love don’t remember how to love them back. We need more Ed’s in this world.
My mom was 45 when she got sick and 47 when she was diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer’s. She passed away on my birthday 11/23/20 when she was 62. I never could have imagined how bad it would get. It is hands down the worst illness that could be imagined. I worked two weeks a month for the last five years of her life to spend all the time I could with her and I hate that I didn’t get to spend every minute with her. The first time she didn’t recognize me was the worst day of my life and I didn’t think i could ever feel any worse, until the day she died. I’m a self proclaimed momma’s boy and I always will be.
When I first watched this film I had just split up from a man who I know didn’t care about me, the dynamic between us was so skewed that even though he treated me poorly he was very confident I would come back. After perusal this it really gave me a backbone like this is the real deal and I really clung to this to remind myself that quality relationships do exist
This story really got to me. My mom died a few years back of brain cancer, and while she didn’t have Alzheimer’s, she did have dementia like symptoms that got worse over time. I’ll never forget walking into her house about 3 months before she passed, and her staring back at me completely bewildered. I didn’t want to upset her, nor did I want to get upset, when she didn’t recognize me. I smiled and reminded her who I was, and she looked at me even more confused and said ” no your not, my daughter died years ago”…. needless to say I wasn’t expecting that. My mom did have moments of clarity, but as time went on it got less and less. Before my mom got sick, my husband was killed by a drunk driver. I used to wonder what would have been worse, loosing him suddenly like I had, or perusal him slip away over time… I’m still not sure.
To lose your memory of everything that has made you a human being to me is the most cruel illness on the planet.. If you have cancer you still have your memories.. The devastation on family members is horrendous … The fact that you don’t know who your family is seems terrible to me.. Please find a cure for this terrible disease!
My husband had this and he was a police officer for 33 years and a Detective.We were married 38 years.The last 3 years were hard so our son moved in to help me.He couldn’t walk anymore and finally collapsed.He had operations and 3 months of hospitals then hospice then died.My son and I stayed at hotels by each place to be with him.I will always miss him.
My gosh, the love these two people have for each other is something to admire and aspire to. Ed & Pam are the very definition of a marriage that can weather any storm. I became teary-eyed as I watched and listened to Ed’s words. He loves Pam so much, and you can hear the heartache in his voice that he misses the person she used to be. Heart-wrenching and beautiful at the same time.
My Mother suffered from Alzheimer’s as well, she died in 2008. I have so much advise, thousand’s of words to say regarding what your family will experience during this trying time. I’ll only mention a few. I lived with my Mother for the last nine years, there were wonderful caregivers, plus my sisters and I shared weekend duties. Take time for YOU, your Mother’s needs will be met, she’ll be clothed, fed, kept warm/cold, etc., it’s important that your Father, yourself, any family member that will assist to take care of themselves. When the time comes, hide the car keys, remote control, wallet/purse, have a designated place for these things. When you go to the store, always keep her in your sight, play her favorite music daily, (musicality is one of the last things to fade), adjust with her, be her advocate, (it’s okay to tell a Doctor “no” to unnecessary medical procedures), prepare (living will, do not resuscitate decisions, etc.) Don’t forget to laugh, sometimes laughing will save your sanity. Good luck, sending positive thoughts and prayers to your family.
What a beautiful and sad story. My mother suffered from Alzheimer‘s for around 10 years. I watched the person she was get slowly swallowed by this horrible disease until she didn’t know any of us anymore. And my dad was by her side through it all. They were married 64 years when she passed away. It was a true example of Love and devotion. Just like this loving couple.
Alzheimers is very unfortunate. I’ve worked with elders with alzheimers and it’s sad to see them lose themselves, always confused. Looking for their spouse or parents that have passed long ago. But I seriously applaud this man and this womans family for not putting her in a home. I’ve seen way to many sweet elders being dumped off because it becomes too difficult for the family to be that. . A family.
My grandmother lived with this disease for 17 years. She passed last year on July 28th 2019, I had the unfortunate/fortunate however you would like to see it, memory of perusal her take her last breaths, and was the one that notified my family that she was no longer breathing. It still is raw today almost a year later. The disease is so ugly, but the people it affects are so beautiful.
I went through this with my father, I saw him fade away every day, it was so hard for me and for my family, I’m the youngest of my siblings, when he was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s I was 16 years old, it was so hard and still is, he past away three years ago, and still I feel his presence around the house, and I miss him every day, even though I’ve technically lived with him for only 16 years, but I have so many memories, he was a great man a national hero that people don’t know because he was in the secret service, something i knew only a year before his passing, I’m proud of him and always will. I love you dad rest in peace, from Algeria 🇩🇿
My Grandma has had Alzheimer’s for 12 years now, she doesn’t know anyone in her family except her husband of 65 years and even in some moments she forgets him. My grandpa cared for her by himself as long as he could and hired part time care. She has recently been placed in a nursing home and it was extremely hard for my grandfather. He wants nothing else but to be with his wife and lifelong companion.
my mother had a devastating stroke in her early 60’s that left her unable to speak or walk. She spent the next 16 years of her life either in bed or a chair. My father along with the help of nurses cared for her until the day she passed away Dec 24, 2017. Dad lived to Sept 3, 2014. They were married on July 15, 1950. He loved her till the day she died with all of his heart. I miss mom when she was “mom” and not a day goes by that I don’t miss dad too. No matter how old you are when you lose your parents there is a kid in you that lost your mom and dad. It will still hurt and you will always wish there was something you could ask them that only they would know.
My mom had Alzheimer’s. It was difficult. My dad did everything just like this man, but he finally crumbled and broke down because he couldn’t do it any longer after about four years. Once my mom was placed into a safe Alzheimer’s residence, my dad would visit every day and my mom settled in quite nicely with the other folks on the unit. It is a devastating condition because it robs you of your loved one while they are still alive and then it takes their life so it feels like you lose them twice.
What an awesome man your dad is. How is momma now? My mother has Alzheimer’s too. We are also blessed with a good loving dad and husband. My mom is in a nursing home because my dads health was going down hill. It tore him up to let her go. They both will be 90 at their next birthday. I do know that when you get it earlier in life it happens way faster. I am sorry your family has to go through this. I can’t believe this is my first time seeing this article. I have been on YouTube for 2 years with articles of my mother. I have meet some amazing people through this awful disease.
It feels like he is giving up. Spouses need support systems too. Not only is it hard to witness your loved one getting more and more sick, the person you fell in love with really isn’t the same person anymore and society tells you you have to withstand everything because you’re not the one who is sick. It’s unbearable alone. I just want to hug them both.
Lost my Mother to this cruel disease in 2016 also. I still have my DAD and as he says ” I still have my marbles” at 88. No matter how many people I meet that go through this, the names are different but the faces are the same. My deepest sympathy to all who endure, care and Love the ones who slowly “go away”
Thank for sharing your family’s story. I am in the first stages of EOAD. I was married for 20 years but he chose not to stay for many reasons but I do have my own apartment now & it is lovely. I live alone with my cat Rosie & my family comes by daily. I do not look forward to the time when I know I won’t be able to live alone & that saddens me but for now I live one day or one hour at a time. This disease forces me to live moment by moment & I kinda like that because it causes me to not have to think & stress about all the days troubles. I can only think in the moment so I do what I can at that time. I know that I have lost the ability to do things I used to do but mostly I don’t remember what they are so I don’t miss them. Your wife is so lucky to have you. Bless your heart sir. Kimberly
This story touched me so much. My grandmother died of Alzheimer’s and perusal her slowly forget how to do everything she loved to do was heartbreaking. perusal someone you love and slowly loose their independence and their memory is one of the hardest things. She was such a huge part of my life, only living a few minutes away and i would do anything to get to have another day with her. So much respect for this husband and wife. I hope she rests in peace❤️
what a beautiful women and such a wonderful husband can tell he really loves hes wife. and she still has that beautiful smile it must be so hard for him to see the person he loves like this.and i really admire you this had me in tears so sad this disease.but i feel if you really love someone you would stay with that person no matter what it’s like taking your vows.God bless you Ed and Pam.
My heart just melted. What a beautiful woman she was. Her eyes and smile… pure windows of a kind soul. May she rest in peace and my huge huge admiration for Mr. White. So loving, so compassionate, such an example of what unique and extremely rare love is. Bless his soul and that of his beloved ones. Love from Mexico.
That story is the kind of story my mom and dad had. In our case it was him who got Alzheimer. She looked after him all by herself for 10 years. For the last 6 years he did not who we are, he lost the ability to speak and write. He walked in a strange way for the last 4 years. He loved to be hugged by us and that is the only thing that he liked. It was horrible for us all. My mom got a cancer and died as soon as my dad died.
I started having memory loss a few years ago, I was also in extreme pain. I was falling down, getting disoriented, and seeing things. I started vitamin D2 15.000IU every other day and all that has gotten better. No more seeing things, getting dizzy or disoriented, and my memory improved, I heard zink helps that too, so I’m going to start taking that.
It’s so sad to think the love of your life just slowly disappears. My husband died suddenly of a stroke. My children and I would have taken care of him forever had we had the chance. Somehow I think the sudden loss was more merciful for us than perusal him fade away would have been. What a beautiful love story this family has shared. My thoughts and prayers go out to them.
My mother has Alzheimer’s but its very slow & my dad often would give us updates & started to take over with tasks. However he has now been diagnosed with terminal lung cancer. Miraculously my mom has stepped up & is doing what we normally would never imagined she could do. They have been married 73 years. What will I ever do without them.
I’m just seeing this now. My husband, at the age of 51, was diagnosed with early onset dementia. perusal this smart, funny, kind, generous man slowly disappear in front of me is heartbreaking. He used to do everything and take care of me, now it’s my turn. This was a beautiful documentary; thank you for sharing this beautiful person with us.
🤧🤧🤧 my nana had Alzheimer’s, grandpa & her we’re married for 60+ years, 19 kids together 17 alive, 66 grandchildren, 130+ great grandchildren and 5 great great grandchildren & the family is still growing!! He cared for her as much as he could, then my mom (youngest) took over full time. It’s a very sad disease, but in the end you feel very blessed you took care of them in their most vulnerable state. Beautiful!!!!
I’m going through now with my husband He is 66 and I’m 46 never in my life tough was going to decide to put him in a memorie care or nursing home I love him and we been married for 20 years. This is hard,He hit me 2 months ago because he didn’t know I was his wife,now I’m afraid He going have another episode. We trying to admit this is happening. In another side some of his family is just telling me what to do .I don’t know how to live without him 😞 😔
This is absolutely beautiful!! I just lost my grandma this week and my grandpa to Alzheimer’s 5 years ago. Their 66th wedding anniversary is Friday the day of her funeral so we know she was ready to be with him. This article jerked my heart because you can tell that is true love. I hope for everyone to experience love like this ❤️
My grandpa has Alzheimer’s and he’s 79 it’s very sad to see him the way he is I think he still knows who I am but I’m not sure I’m guess I’m to afraid to ask kinda scared of what his response will be. Luckily I have a wonderful grandmother that loves and takes care of him I hope someday a cure is found
What a beautiful loving family, especially her husband. I hope he’s found closure and is happy. May she Rest In Peace. Alzheimer’s and dementia is harder on the patient’s family at times, seeing your loved ones lose their “selves”. My maternal grandmother toward the end of her life couldn’t remember me, when I saw her and asked her who she thought I was, she said my mothers name. I choked back tears as she looked at me and said my mothers name and smiled. She’s in a good place now ❤️
He reminds me of my brother & law who’s willingly and beautifully taking care of my sister. I’m so grateful to him & plan to go help him with her when the time comes. She’s still at the beginning of this road but I know the commitment to her for both he & I will stay strong. This was a beautiful film.
What a beautiful Man and such a kind and loving Husband you are to your darling Beautiful Wife. You are a living example of what a loving caring Hhsband should be to his wife and family. if the tables were turned I bet 100percent hour Beautiful wife would be looking after you. I have to say this because its so true…Your wife is so Beautiful she looks like a Movie Star..even now as she has aged..and I don’t think I have ever seen a more Beautiful Smile on a woman in my life..You Sir would be her reason for smiling. Wishing you all my love and best wishes from Australia Suzy Muir
What is the difference between LBD and Alzheimer’s-symptom-wise? Wasn’t Robin Williams diagnosed with LBD and Parkinson’s? I gad a friend I thought had Alzheimer’s, but someone said he had LBD instead. I don’t think I could bring myself to committing suicide if I were diagnosed with either, but I’d hate to know I’d be a burden to my family. Is Parkinson’s the link to LBD and not Alzheimer’s?
My mother and father have been married for 61 years. They are now 80 and 82. My Mom is about 4 years into an Alzheimer’s diagnosis. It is as big an emotional struggle for my Dad to see his lifelong best friend and partner deteriorate right before his eyes as it is a physical struggle for an 82 year old man to take on the tasks he insists HE tends to for her. They still show dance in the living room. They still love each other more than anything, and Mama still smiles and tells us what a good man he is. What a blessing in the midst of the storm.
Your wife is a lucky woman. I went in for a knee replacement and when my husband of 5 months saw me in a walker and a came during my recover (only 5 days in! He tossed me out and said he didn’t want to be married to an old woman. I want to thank you for loving your wife so much and go ring your marriage vows. God bless you.
Thank you very much for sharing this with all of us. It’s sad to watch but I’m sure it’s much more difficult for your family to deal with this disease every single day, especially your father, her care giver. Your family is lucky to have her, and she is surely very lucky to have all of you! My mother-in-law is in the same situation. My father-in-law served in air force for many years when he was young. He passed away two years ago. We miss him a lot! If he is still alive and healthy, he would have done exactly the same like your father has been doing. God bless your mom and dad and your entire family! Remember to take care of yourselves too!
I have a friend who told me several years ago that her mother was in full dementia by age 40, when she was still in high school. Imagine my fear when the day came that my friend could remember that we had a standing lunch date (a standing lunch date that she was increasingly a no-show for), but could not remember my name. She was only 60. I then realized it was happening to her too. It breaks my heart that she has slipped away, and her family has kept it a secret from almost all her friends. Perhaps that was her request. Treasure today, tomorrow is not guaranteed.
My grandfather is currently living with Alzheimer’s. he got diagnosed nearly 4 years a go. It’s the most heartbreaking thing to see someone, who you grew up with, someone who you’ve looked up to your whole life, someone who became your hero, turn into a stranger. And his eyes, I’m now a stranger to him. He no longer knows who I am. And perusal this, tore my heart apart.
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 1 Corinthians 13:4-8
Dementia does not change patients. It drives us into prejudice and misjudgement against the patients. Just because they are diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease does not mean we can deny their dignity. I am a 44-year old Japanese making ends meet as a translator. I have seen this article in Japan and I have been impressed with it. Thanks a lot for posting this article.
My husband had a massive stroke I could of lost him but I prayed 🙏 I believe in God . He’s here today has a hard time talking or saying words he’s always will be in a wheelchair we been married over a year . I love him so much I help him with everything his left side still works . I still believe and pray he will improve over some time . It takes patients to take care of a loved one . We go by our vows through sickness and health, richer or poorer till death do us part .
My father died from alzheimers dementia concerns. It was beyond sad for me to watch his downward decline. To me, Alzheimers is tragic. Your wife was lucky to have a loving supportive husband and family like yours. I feel your sadness, heartbreak and despair. What are the lessons that we sre supposed to learn from this happening in our lives? I learned how much I loved my father. I had to learn patience also. I wish you blessings, some comfort and some help from the almighty father who watches over us all.
I was in a very bad motorcycle accident about 2 years ago . I Got hit head on by a drunk driver on my motorcycle . I Lost a piece of my rib cage, had major internal bleeding in my brain . I even Had to go to physical therapy to walk again, it was a Pretty bad situation, The one one person who I thought would stay by my side was my long time girlfriend . She literally Left me the night she found out about my accident. Blocked my number and everything. That devastated me even more then my already low physical state. I personally feel our generation has lost our sense of loyalty to each other . We have no problem loving each other, only when things are going smooth. If you can find some one like this then stick with them because they are not easy to come by. This story is beautiful . Just an update I was fortunate enough to make a full recovery and I’m back Riding again (,:
Sad but beautiful story. What a husband. Admirable to be sure. I am a 72 yr old retired nurse n i know how challenging n difficult this diagnosis is. So when I compliment you you know where it’s coming from. Your wife is a beautiful woman. Stunning as a young girl. I am happy for your wonderful memories. May they help sustain your journey. My very best. God bless you all. As we know this is a family disease. Everyone suffers. God bless Rebecca n all of you.
She has a beautiful smile. Beautiful. You just don’t know. We look back at article of ourselves when we were young and beautiful. It’s hard to believe when we get such a diagnosis. We age, our looks change and fade, Embrace life and your health. What a great husband…That’s love, It’s all we all want is to have someone love us even when we are no longer perfect. We don’t all have that . Bless this woman and her loving husband.
When I was little, my great grandmother got diagnosed with alzheimers. She had gotten married to my great grandpa when she was 18, they’d been together for over 50 years. He stopped taking his medication and hid that from us, and basically killed himself so he wouldn’t have to watch her forget the life they had. She progressed rapidly after he died. I always hated hearing her ask when Don (her husband) was coming home. I miss them so much.
It’s a wonderful treat to see the BEFORE. As a care-giver, I only ever meet the AFTER. I work with people who have dementia, Huntington’s disease, brain injuries, and so forth. I would so much like to see something of my new friends before they reach me. Thank you for showing me a small glimpse of the light before the darkness.
My grandmother had this and my grandfather was her caregiver to the end. She passed away four years ago and my grandfather this spring. After my grandmother passed way my grandfather’s health took a turn. None of us knew how bad his health was. What I’m getting to is that sometimes caregivers are so busy taking care of the loved one that they’re not listening to thier bodies. My advice to this husband is get some help taking care of his wife and make sure he is also taking care of him self.
I’d heard about the movie ‘The Notebook’, was told by some that it was awesome, and other’s saying it was way to soppy and predictable. About 7years after it’s release, I watched it. The story was amazing and the movie sure was soppy, but it touched on a truth that no matter where we go in life, what we do, love is one of the strongest bonds we can have. Ed and Pam are one of those couples where they’ve endured where others didn’t. And what made them endure and continue with their lives together, love. They are an example of true deep meaningful relationship that we find ourselves in later years of a marriage or relationship. Love.
My grandfather passed away from Alzheimer’s when I was 5, he was 68. I never really got to know him, which is really sad. My mother always tells me that when I was born, he was very sick already, but he smiled and cried when he got to hold me for the first time. I have a really nice photo of me on his lap. He was very proud of me. <3
The genius of Marian really hit home when I saw it on Frontline. I made darn near everyone I knew watch it after having gone through a similar story and not having had anyone in my peer group to relate to, I could talk about things but I think it was too abstract for them, THIS however maybe due to objectivity made it possible for others to understand and as time has gone on I’m still finding myself directing people to the film who are going through a familial diagnosis 🙏🏻❤️🙏🏻
My husband was hospitalized the last 3 months. Then he passed away. He had cried Please don’t send me away. I only did when he collapsed. I spent days beside his bed. I just lost him moñths ago.I cry a lot. We were married 38 years.He was a cop for 33 years.I never want another man I am75 and get his full retirement if I never remarry.I have my son with me.I know your pain
Thank you for adding this film. I’ve not watched it since broadcast for personal reasons. But tonight, for whatever reason, I decided to, despite owning my own copy on DVD. Which I’ve never watched. The story behind this film is just as important as its message, contrary to the media hell that surrounded its second release in 2007. Paul Watson painstakingly filmed the family over many, many years. There was no direction or mission, just the truth of this horrific illness. Paul turned up and pointed his camera at what happened, however brutal. He even chose to film it by himself, no lighting or sound person – just him and a camera using, at the time, the latest Sony digital camera. Not to be clever but because he cared that Malcolm would not react well to a full film crew surrounding him. Paul was a family member. Paul is a wonderful, sensuous and caring filmmaker – not the hard story-chasing hack some would have you believe. He points a camera and lets the pictures tell the story. Malcolm is my father. The music on this film is all his composition. I am his youngest son – the one who did ‘nothing’ and kept ‘putting it away’. Still doing that!! Paul has my utmost, utmost respect for this film. He is a gentlemen, an artist and a filmmaker only ever interested in the truth. Thank you for putting the film up here. However painful it is, this film lays bare the truth of this evil illness. People, and the powers that be, need to understand how brutal the world of Alzheimer’s is.
I lost my father to Alzheimer’s in 2001. It was a five year journey for him/us. Thankfully he received excellent care (my parents lived in an apartment in a fantastic senior retirement place. My mother lived ten years after his passing and her mind was completely sharp til the end. From what I understand we were very fortunate as dad never showed any aggression or anger. Before Alzheimer’s, he was a gentle soul and that never changed. He was much different from some of the behavior we see from Malcolm in this article. I’m very grateful not to have experienced that. Barbara took so much on herself, she was in dire need of respite throughout. I’m sorry to hear about Barbara’s passing from the same illness.
Dementia is a “living” death… you witness the inexorable loss of everything you hold dear about your loved one. What’s worse is fact that you can do NOTHING to stop or slow down the progression of the disease. It truly doesn’t matter how much you love that person because dementia is a incredibly cruel and heartless disease.
My mother’s final day… I begged the doctor to please end it as had this been my animal suffering I cld put it out of it’s suffering so how much more so my beloved mom… he angrily said he cld’nt do anything even when I informed him that as a Nursing Sister she admitted to administering extra morphine to end the suffering of a patient… he looked at me and shortly after that she fell into a coma… I thanked him… I wld never divulge his name but am still grateful for his compassion….
Thank you for sharing this. My mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, but, fortunately, she only suffered a year of it. While I miss her, seeing this makes me grateful she never needed to go this far. It’s heartbreaking to watch someone once strong and vibrant falling so far from themselves. Love to Barbara.
My mother has dementia. I feel my mom left long time ago. I miss so much her previous personality I miss my Mother so much! Because she invested time and gave so much love, respect against all odds to me, no judgement only unconditional love . My mother is so loved, respected and looked after now that she can no longer take care of her self . It is challenging to care for patients with Alzheimers. They need love and unconditional love. Caregivers need support and a break as well. Take care folks.
I lost my dad two months ago. He was diagnosed with slow progression dementia several years ago, but 3 weeks before he died he was diagnosed with stage 4 metastatic prostate cancer (by the time it was found it was in his bones, brain, and most internal organs) My sweet 15yo son made the statement “I’m glad it was something quick that took him and he got to go knowing who we all were and that we were there, and he got to take most of his memories with him”
its an evil disease. it distroys the person ever so slowly, inch by inch. l live with my parent when l was in my 20’s after my marriage fell apart while there my grandfather was moved in. it wasnt too bad at the start, but slowly it turned him into a stranger. he was put into a home. he didnt knows us for awhile then he did. it was so very sad, heartbreaking. all the best to all those carers and families who go through this its a nightmare
Love and care has to be unconditional. I see this and I truly am homesick for my Nursing days at the Geriatric homes. I felt I had a place there everyday, the warm smiles and greetings no matter how jumbled made sense to me because I would look in their eye’s and search for their light. You grow so much in your youth from learning how precious life is, to have sweet and gentle compassion. I still have a tender place for elderly in my heart. The wonderful stories I was blessed with from some of the residents were the most wise, profound, hilarious, and memorable. What treasures we have in these aged persons, what blessed treasures. May God bless and ease their burdens.
my darling husband asked me two days ago…’you won’t leave me?’…He has been diagnosed with Alzheimer a little over a week ago…I responded ”’I would never leave you Darling”…His smile and beautiful eyes…showed how comforted he was…23 yrs together….I suspected he had this illness for nearly 12 yrs…but refused to see a Specialist…now, in my research, I understand and feel so guilty for I thought he lost all common sense, in denial, agitated, etc etc…I need to forgive myself and just show him Grace and dignity as he deserves…
My mum was diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer’s,the first year she lost all her friends as she became paranoid and combative and frankly very hard to manage. She was always threatening to kill her self and eventually she did by throwing her self down three flights of stairs,the long goodbye they call it😞
I watched my great grandma, grandma and grandfather slowly deteriorate from it. I lost the three people in my life who truly cared and loved me. 1993, 2007 and 2016 are the years I lost them. It broke me when I visited my grandma in the nursing home and she was afraid of me because she didn’t recognize me. It absolutely broke me.
This is truly heart breaking, my Grandmother which was my Mother’s mom had Alzheimer’s, my Mother had Dementia. And yes, it can run in families, 2 years ago my Dr told me i have Alzheimer’s. Oh i can see some changes, but i told my Dr that both Mom and my Grandmother took meds, it didn’t help, so I told him i don’t want anything, he smiled at me and he agreed with my decision. I gave care to both of them, and i have no regrets. May my sweet Mama and Granny Rest in Peace. My Father who passed with cancer, may he Reast in Peace also. ❤️ 🌹 ❤️
My mother is exactly the same. She’s 96 and it began last year. It’s been quite rapid. I’m 67 and her son, and moved back from the USA to live with her and look after her when she had cancer years ago, and now I’m taking care of her with Alzheimers. I don’t regret it and declined help which was offered from the District Nurses and Dementia Unit as my mother gets distressed when anyone visits. Yes it’s difficult when she gets aggressive and violent, but I’ve had to become more detached when this happens and not take it personally. She used to teach and it’s heartbreaking to see her now, a shell of her former self. She is sometimes coherent and can have brief discussions, other times screaming and talking gibberish, cuddling a giant toy dog. I don’t see this as a duty, just a journey we are completing from when she looked after me, and now our situations are reversed. I look for no pity or praise, it’s just a fact of life, and I’m fortunate to have had so many good memories of her. None of us are here for very long, and it brings into reality how pointless our accumulation of possessions are, and the need to prioritize. In the end there’s only love that’s left, and ‘our little lives are rounded with a sleep’.
It’s so very familiar to me. I helped care for my dad as he grappled with Lewy Body Dementia. It was a nightmare. So much of what poor Barbara dealt with is exactly what we dealt with. The only difference is my dad would have ups and downs, with periods of mental clarity and physical normalcy for several weeks at a time, every so often, right until the end. My poor dad expressed such fear and anxiety when he was able to express it. This breaks my heart, and I wish that no one ever had to endure such misery. It’s a monstrous disease.
As a nurse, I remember a family member becoming angry at the care staff for not doing things to her satisfaction, she was always so demanding and angry at us. We never had enough staff. The family just couldn’t handle it and decided she could give better care at home so he took her hubby home to care for him. Three months later her husband returned to the facility. The wife looked so tired and haggered. She never complained to the staff again. This is the hardest but most fulfilling job I’ve ever had. 😔
I watched my parents die within 5 months of each other. It was sad seeing their health deteriorate over the years but they didn’t loose their mind to Alzheimer’s or Demintia. I could not imagine anyone that has to watch their loved one’s go through such a process. It would kill me inside to watch such a thing and I commend anyone that has to go through this. God bless the families that are faced with this situation.
Malcolm is my age. I just turned 57. I often think about how young I still feel. Alzheimers has got to be one of the cruelest things that can go wrong with us. I felt so sad for Barbara. I think many times, the Doctors over medicate the patients, so they don’t have to deal with them. I have a mentally disabled daughter, and that has happened to her. The whole thing is just heartbreaking.
I wrote a bit piece about this article in the comments section – but it was too big didn’t post, send or save – so now it’s lost 🙁 Anyway, I looked after Malcolm on and off from about 96-98,. Someone who stands out for me. Even though I only got to meet him after hid diagnosis I found him A remarkable, funny, intelligent, talented man. Such a cruel thing to have bestowed itself on such a ‘life-giver’. I watched him once, in o bit of a mood about something ( Barbra stated he was ‘adopting now things to be moody about – in an attempt to placate me I’m sure ) But he spotted an upright piano in the corner of the room, flipped the lid, pulled out the seat, plonket about with one finger for a bit – and suprsed as all ( atleast those who didn’t know better) with a beautiful rendition – he played itlike it was already there – in the air. It was beautifulSeeing the big strong guy I remember makes the end all that harder to watch, Although I will as it’s part of the journey he’ s bravely been through – with his amazing wife at his side – never wavering, amazing woman ! and necessary for the conclusion of the mans amazing story. God bless.x
I call this ‘The Walking Death.’ My father died of Dementia on February 15th of 2016, my mother died of it on January 25th, this year. I prayed my mother would die before she had to go into the area where she would be locked in, He answered my prayer. My mother was riddled with osteo-arthritis, even with fentynal and oxycodone she found no relief. Dementia is such a horrible, cruel dilemma, you are constantly blind-sided by the behavior of the person suffering memory loss. I felt so sorry for my parents, I have siblings, but somehow it fell to me, the oldest to do the physical caring for them. Taking my dad’s keys away from him was so hard to do, because I love to drive, he kept telling me that, I think he is stupid! In this small town my parents knew a lot of people, I hadn’t lived here for 47 years. My dad turned me in to the police three times for ‘stealing his car keys.’ One time he left home and walked the block to the hospital and they got him a taxi to take him to the clinic so he could tell his doctor on me. He had to go five blocks to the clinic, when I got there, the taxi lady seemed to know I was looking for him, she said, “He owes me eight dollars!” There he was, sitting in the waiting room, he looked a little smug, but didn’t give me any trouble in taking him home!! I could write a book about my experiences, like when my mom called me to come over and look at this stranger in her house. I went over, she was in the kitchen, she whispered for me to go in the living room and see if I think that is my dad.
this summer my husband has been diagnosed with same condition by the Addenbrooke’s team in Cambridge too. He has issues with understanding and processing language but at the moment it’s quite mild . By the end of the film about Malcolm I was in tears for him and for Barbara. But also tears for what will happen to my husband too. I look at him now and find it hard that it will go like that as at the moment he is independant and driving. Most of the time is fine. We have good support from a lovely Dementia nurse for basic information. Thank you for this film that sadly shows the raw reality of this wicked disease that robs people’s mind, thoughts and awareness of life and their surroundings. So very sad for Malcolm as so gifted and talented man.
I’ve worked in the care sector and I must confess looking after those with dementia especially in the advanced stages is emotionally draining, it really was for me the hardest part of the job, it often left me teary eyed and for me it was a job I could go home from & have holidays from whereas loved ones who are carers don’t get to home, they are at home… I have so much respect and admiration for Barbara and all carers who care so selflessly for their relatives, it really is like a living death. Such a terrible illness.
I worked in Nursing Homes and saw staff yelling at people like him. They are in the wrong profession. These people need love and nurturing and understanding. It just made me cry. They can’t help it. The poor wife. What a trooper. It is hard living with this. That poor man. Love and Prayers for both of you!
Barbara is an angel, her voice is soothing and amazing. It’s almost like a song. I’m not surprised she and Malcolm fell in love with each other. It’s perfect. I’m so ashamed of nature, and of the fact that Alzheimer’s did this to them. It’s so absurd, and so sad. His son is amazingly talented and I’m crossing my fingers for him, that he did well for himself with the absolute talent that his dad imparted on him. The entire family is gorgeous. Sad, but gorgeous. I had a family member in this position, and it was heartbreaking. They did the best they could, and more than most. I admire them.
I lost my grandmother to Alzheimer’s three and a half years ago and I’ve also worked with those suffering and it is suffering dementia. Barbara, her love and determination to care for her husband is what true love is. This was filmed a long time ago but what would happen to Malcolm if she wasn’t there as his champion? Over medicated or given medication that was clearly having a detrimental effect on his wellbeing, Barbara was doing a better job seeing the harmful effect the meds were having on him over the doctors!. Dementia is one of the very cruelest diseases alongside MND. The families would come to visit their loved ones and I will never forget the pain on one daughters face when her parent didn’t recognise or interact with her yet responded to the staff. My Gran travelled the journey very much like Malcom. She had a UTI and was taken to respite care where she attacked two members of staff and broke two windows with a walking stick she found. That night she was escorted off the property by the police and taken to a psych ward. She was never aggressive as herself but Alzheimer’s took her down that path as it does with many. It took a couple of years for them to get her meds right and by that point she was in a care home, she wasn’t capable to look after herself and home care just wasn’t enough. Where Malcom remembered the piano my Gran remembered her cats some from my early memories. Alzheimer’s and the UTI’s took their hold (they often go hand in hand and have a severe effect) and over two weeks she had two major heart attacks, the first of which the doctors couldn’t believe didn’t kill her, the usual UTI and she even beat sepsis.
My sister in law is suffering from Alzheimer’s Disease too. She still can stand a conversation. I started perusal this Documentary to learn and understand how it develops, so I can be with her as much as possible. Thanks so much for sharing your lives adventure with the rest of the world! We are all siblings in our Lord’s Love. I’m sure both Malcolm and Barbara are well together up in Heaven! God bless you guys!!! ❤❤❤
What a beautiful wife, women, soft spoken, intelligent, kind and compassionate person they must have been best friends and had a tremendous love between them most women would have walked away forgetting about the love and life they had sometimes taking other men before they even died she truly still loves this man until he died Barbara no amount of the violence she was put through but continued to be there every step of the way until the very end so that he could die in dignity i
The problem with this disease is that the brain deteriorates in different areas and at different times so you never know what’s going to change next. When the person becomes a shell of their former selves and are “locked in” it is absolutely ok to want the pain and horror to go away as soon as possible. One person cannot do this alone and should never guilt themselves into thinking that they can. You are literally trying to take the place of brain that has been destroyed. Anger, physical violence, incontinence, no communication, delusional thinking, no memories, huge danger of being left alone are what is left in various degrees. The caregiver must realize how destructive this disease is to him, but especially to her.
I’m so deeply honored that you let us into your lives to show the world this horrible disease. Barbara I hope that you as well have found happiness in your life, you were a loving and respectful and caring wife, whom til the end took such devoted and loving care of Malcolm. You will be in my prayers dear lady 🙏❤
My heart goes out to you Barbara, I thought my story was worst but perusal you! God bless you for taking such a good care of your husband. I took care of my husband until he took his final breath at forty one he was six years older than me, God and my family have been my strength raising very very young kids.
Malcolm looked at the end like my dad did when he came back from the Burma Siam railway in the Second World War. It took the love of a woman to get him back on his feet so that he was able to live a reasonably normal life although he was ill most of his life and died quite young. My parents were an inspirational couple and I was privelaged to care for my mother in the last few years of her life after she developed dementia and had strokes. It is a gift from God to be able to care for a loved one
Such a shame for Malcolm and others who go through this horrible death, Barbara is an inspiration to others, looking at Malcolm at the end and how ill and thin he was, i do not understand how any one can let another person suffer like this, why keep him alive and in pain for so long is cruel, if your pet was dying and in pain the first place you would go to is your vet and help your pet to die peacefully ….I truly think more should be done to help people like Malcolm die with dignity and without pain. Bless you Barbara and for taking care of your husband.
Great article! Thank you! I cared for Rose who had dementia. It was as if she left her body and an evil spirit came in to cause havoc. Dementia can be horrible for the caregiver as well as the patient. The Inspire Caregiver book was created for the health of the caregiver. With dementia growing at alarming rates- we are going to need all the help we can get! Great article. Thanks for sharing!!!
Oh thank you so much for putting this on youtube. I saw this on telly and looked for it for a long time with no luck. The experience of this couple feels so like the reality of the disease. My mum had early onset and my dad looked after her until it became completely impossible. The decline of Malcolm, his behavior and symptoms so closely mirror those of my mother its quite heartbreaking. If someone has no idea about this disease I think this film more than anything else I have seen will take you on the inevitable journey that awaits everyone who loves someone with Alzheimers
The most heartbreaking story I’ve seen and heard!😢 So much respect for his wife for all the love and care for the love of her life, and a very intelligent smart husband! Alzheimers is the most horrific disease I think anyone could go through! Taking ALL your dignity and soul! Thank god euthanasia is so widely available nowadays, to ease the pain and suffering on both the patient and carer! Who on earth would want to live like poor Malcolm in the end! Alzheimers really is such a catastrophic disease! 💔😔
The absolute definition of “til death do us part” . . . Barbara was absolutely Malcolm’s angel, such a courageous woman to carry on for twelve years that way. Poor Malcolm trapped and suffering all that time and thank God for his family, especially Barbara. This is such a heartbreaking disease, but true love prevailed until the very end. Rest in peace Malcolm <3