In the Bible, marriage is a sacred covenant between one man and one woman, established by God. A good Christian wife is a woman of noble character, wisdom, and strength who uses her strength to lift up her marriage. The Bible describes marriage as a covenantal relationship between one man and one woman, with the purpose of creating a godly home and nurturing a loving and respectful relationship with her husband.
A biblical wife seeks to honor God through her role as a wife, following the guidance and teachings of the Bible. She approaches marriage as a sacred covenant, striving to create a godly home and nurture a loving and respectful relationship with her husband. A biblical wife recognizes and respects the authority of her husband, as stated in Ephesians 5:22-30.
The Bible states that marriage causes a man and woman to become “one flesh,” manifested most fully in the physical union of sexual intimacy. The New Testament adds a warning regarding this oneness, stating that they are no longer two but one. A married woman is bound by law to her husband while he lives, but if her husband dies, she is released from the law of marriage. Accordingly, she will be called an adulteress if she lives with another man while her husband is alive.
A successful biblical marriage involves both the husband and the wife fulfilling certain roles, such as submitting to their own husbands and revering, admiring, and honoring their husbands. A godly husband and godly wife will have a godly marriage, and they will be examples of God’s love.
📹 “WIVES SUBMIT” – What it REALLY means! Bible Study
An unashamed teaching on this controversial and often misunderstood passage. What submission is/isn’t, how to submit and …
What is a wife supposed to do according to the Bible?
In Ephesians 5:33, the Bible says wives should respect their husbands. This means respecting your husband. A good wife respects her husband and considers his needs. This is one of the most debated and misunderstood roles of being a wife. In Colossians 3:18-19, the Bible says, “Wives, submit to your husbands.” Submission has nothing to do with blind obedience or women being inferior to men. It’s about the wife trusting her husband. Submission goes with the husband’s role of leadership. Submission lets the husband become the leader God wants him to be and fulfill the roles of a husband in a biblical marriage.
What is the biblical purpose of a woman?
The woman was created to be loved by God. She was to reflect God’s character. God made the woman to have His moral qualities. She is to resemble Him in spirit and in these qualities. She was made to act and function like God. Proverbs 31 says, “Do what God has called you to do, and remember His character.” That’s why it talks about a “wife of noble character” (verse 10 NIV). Having a relationship with the Lord and developing His character in your life will strengthen and sustain you in all your activities and accomplishments. With God’s help, you can do your many responsibilities and fulfill God’s purposes for you.
Thought: It’s easy to forget God when you’re busy.
What does the Bible say about a wife’s role and responsibilities in marriage?
Scripture from this episode. Ephesians 5:22-24 “Wives, submit to your husbands.” 23 The husband is the head of the wife, just as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of the body. 24 So the church should obey Christ, and wives should obey their husbands. Genesis 3:16: To the woman He said: “I will make you sad and cause you to have children. You will want your husband and he will rule over you.Ephesians 5:25-27: “Husbands, love your wives. Just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her, husbands should love their wives. This love should be shown through actions, not just words. Husbands should also present their wives to God as a holy, spotless, and blemish-free church. How can I stay loving towards my husband when I’m irritated and angry due to hormonal changes? I struggle with pornography and know it hurts my wife. What can I do to quit? Men: Ephesians 5:25-27 “Husbands, love your wives. Just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her, love your wives too. 26 That He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, 27 that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish.”; Women: Ephesians 5:22-24 “Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.” 23 The husband is in charge of the wife, just as Christ is in charge of the church. He is the Savior of the body. 24 So the church should obey Christ, and wives should obey their husbands.
What is the role of a good wife in the Bible?
The Hebrew word for “helper” in this passage is also used in the Bible to refer to God helping us. This word also means “helper” for a wife, showing that we can help our husbands in many ways. God made wives to help their husbands. In Ephesians 5:33, Paul says, “Let the wife respect her husband.” When you respect your husband, you notice him, honor him, and esteem him. It means valuing his opinion, admiring him, appreciating his commitment, and considering his needs and values. Our husbands have many needs. The myth of the invincible macho man is false. One day Dennis gave me a list of what he thought most men needed. Respecting your husband means meeting his needs. I try to encourage Dennis by being his number one fan. Every husband wants his wife to support him. A husband needs a wife who believes in him and supports him.
What does the Bible say about a woman to her husband?
Wives, submit to your husbands. The husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church. The church submits to Christ, so wives should submit to their husbands.
What does the Bible say about a woman being married?
Jesus allows someone to remarry if they have been unfaithful. “Whoever divorces his wife for any reason and marries another commits adultery.” This raises the issue of remarriage. Jesus says that if a spouse is unfaithful, the other can remarry without committing adultery. Paul says that marriage is permanent, whether to a believer or an unbeliever. However, he allows a believer to separate if their spouse leaves them. Paul says that if the unbeliever leaves, the believer is not bound to stay in the marriage. If the marriage is over, you can get married again. But Paul doesn’t say you can’t. So, if you get divorced for adultery, you can get married again. And if you get divorced because your spouse doesn’t believe in God, you can get married again. Some churches say that remarriage is allowed after a biblical divorce, while others say it is not. We don’t say that any interpretation is binding on our members. The elders urge anyone thinking of remarriage to pray and study the scriptures. This will help them make the right decision. The Lord may affirm singleness in His service or provide the peace that remarriage is what is best. If an offended spouse chooses to pursue either singleness or biblical remarriage, the church and elders will support them. This includes our pastors officiating at remarriage weddings.
What is the responsibility of a woman in marriage?
A woman is traditionally responsible for taking care of her parents. As a wife, she serves her husband by preparing food, clothing, and other needs. As a mother, she has to take care of the kids and their education. As a worker, she must be professional, disciplined, and a good employee. She is also expected to take part in community activities and volunteer work. Men have traditionally been the family’s main income earner, with little obligation to be socially active. Some cultures and families still have these gender roles today. Women have many responsibilities, which can be hard.
What is God’s purpose for a wife?
Redemption. Marriage is for redemption. God made marriage so that people could be saved from sin. When a couple gets married, they agree to God’s plan for their lives. This plan includes raising children in a God-fearing home and helping each other stay on the path to salvation. A healthy marriage is built on Jesus Christ. Are the purposes for marriage still relevant today? The three purposes of marriage are still relevant today.
What is the duty of a woman in the Bible?
Ephesians 5:22-24 22 Wives, submit to your husbands. 23 The husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church. 24 The church submits to Christ, so wives should submit to their husbands.
Compiled by The BibleStudyTools Staff on 09/19/2019.
What does the Bible say about women’s roles? Learn about women’s roles in the Bible. Read the Bible to learn more about women’s roles. May these related scripture quotes help you! To find the full context of shorter quotes, click on the chapter above each verse.
What are the qualities of a good woman to marry in the Bible?
The ideal wife in Proverbs is loyal, happy, capable, and strong. She is the perfect helper for her man. A wife is the best thing a man can have. She makes him better. What does it mean that she is the “crown” of her husband? She shows everyone that this man should be honored and respected. She makes her family rich and respects her husband, encouraging her children and others to do the same. A wife who shames her husband is like cancer in his bones. A wife who shames her man leaves him a shell of what he might have been. A worthless husband often leaves his wife destitute and worn out. What does this proverb mean for those who are not married? Choose well. Young people don’t know much. So maybe the older parents should choose, as in many cultures? Parents may not always think about their children’s best interests. Where does a good wife come from? “A wife is inherited from fathers, but a wise wife is from the LORD (Proverbs 19:14).” So the wise young person who wants to marry should pray for a good wife and she should pray for a good husband.
What is a woman’s duty in marriage?
2. Respect your husband. In Ephesians 5:33, Paul says, “The wife must respect her husband.” When you respect your husband, you honor him. It means valuing his opinion, admiring his wisdom and character, appreciating his commitment to you, and considering his needs and values. Our husbands have many needs. The myth of the invincible macho man is false. One day Dennis gave me a list of what he thought were some of the main needs most men have.
Men need to feel like men; to be listened to; to have a companion; to feel needed. Meeting these needs is what respecting your husband is all about. I try to encourage Dennis by being his number one fan. Every husband wants his wife to support him. A husband needs a wife who believes in him and supports him.
Who should a woman marry according to the Bible?
What if we were attracted to each other? The Bible doesn’t say who we should marry. We should seek God in everything, even if it seems good. There’s more to it. A marriage could make or break us, so why not pray about it? A healthy Christian should pray about everything. A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives. If her husband dies, she can marry anyone, but he must be a Christian. This scripture says you can marry anyone, but Paul said we should serve God. Attraction is easy once you meet someone you like. I’ve met guys I liked right away, but God made me realize they weren’t right for me. You may like someone, but if we listen to the Holy Spirit, we’ll know if we should trust God or not. Seek God’s will. Do not be foolish. Know God’s will for your life.
📹 What Establishes a Marriage According to the Bible?
Even though marriage ceremonies today look a lot different from those in biblical times, the nature of what makes a marriage …
Submission done properly should be a blessing & liberating for any Christian wife. I heard excellent teaching on this when the Minister of the church, said that of course, the man must also be submitting to Jesus Christ. So the husband submits to God. The woman submits to her husband as to the Lord Jesus. The husband isn’t being selfish, He is being Christ-like & putting his wife’s needs above his own. The wife isn’t being selfish & is putting her husband’s needs above her own. If both are praying & submitting to God, out of love & respect for one another, there should be much less controversy as both are wanting to obey God & be a blessing to one another, as they seek to properly honor their Lord’s loving authority !!!
How my wife and I interpret this is that it is my place to make the decision, and therefore I assume all the blame for any problem that occurs; whereas my wife is truly liberated to advise me completely, without the inhibition of making the wrong choice. She is my partner, best friend, and confidant on the hard decisions I must make. She must abide by my decisions, but I must make those decisions with her best interests in mind as well.
Wow this has been such a blessing. I am a young woman in college. As I get older, marriage is something that I’m thinking about more often. Submission has always been a difficult topic for me. It used to be one of the reasons I ran away from God and avoided reading the Bible. I’ve recovered my love for God within the past year and I have tears in my eyes right now from this message. How could I not have seen the beauty in his design? God is great and much wiser than I.
My husband sent me your sermon on being a better husband after a rough night of arguing. So far I have been the spiritual head of our household, a role that is not mine and I don’t want, but I digress. I was so impressed with your sermon on Biblical husbands I sought out this article. I am so thankful I did. Thank you for your accurate Biblical representation of both separate callings ❤ I will be listening to more of your sermons!
I spent 15 years with my husband and am truly lucky to have escaped with my life. He follows Rome and looks down on all non-Catholics, including me. All I ever did was submit to him, but he never understood what love is, what it is to place anyone before yourself. He has even made multiple attempts on my life since our divorce. He will never stop wanting me dead, and I constantly live in fear for my life. We have two children, so it makes everything more complicated. I am at peace with God and Christ, and pray for his salvation and my own survival.
Submission is much easier to do, When the husband is a Godly man, doing what he is supposed to do. Then, of course, when mistakes are made, apologies are needed and communication to resolve the issues. As you have said before, Love is not just a feeling, it is a work in progress. A choice that is made and a commitment to Adapt, Adjust and Overcome. Pray together, succeed together.
I’ve had a really hard time with this as a young married woman (got married at 20, now 22) but I think what I’m realizing is that either we haven’t gotten to a point where we disagree enough for me to “submit” (we are usually on the same page about everything), or that I already “submit” but it makes my heart happy because I love and trust my husband.
I just found you and, I thank the Lord for finding you. I believe the Holy Spirit allowed me to not just see your site but I open it and I was blessed. Your expounded on the word has given me strength to become ( I haven’t been submitting as I which means not submitting unto the Lord). Thank you for allowing tube Holy Spirit to give understanding as how to share the written word with not expressing harshness towards the in submitting wives. Be continually blessed.
It’s unreal how upset people get about this subject because they don’t understand that the equivalent job of the man is to love you wife as Christ loves the church and gave himself for it. Christ is not a tyrant, so how could the man in this formula ever be justified in acting like a tyrant? How can a man who prefers his wife above himself subjugate her. Both spouses have to fulfill their scriptural roles of preferring one another above themselves in the way that the scripture describes. That’s real love, and a righteous unity.
Thank you, Mike. I find your teachings very valuable! I listened this series having my son and daughter-in-law in mind, both of whom are not believers. Though I hope to find a way to share with them when the opportunity arises, I discovered in listening to the teaching for the wife that I could apply that to myself even as a divorced woman by submitting to Jesus. So often I find myself trying to look around that plank in my own eye! Again, thanks!
8:25 thank you for the clarification about all other men. I am a recovering JW. Jehovah’s Witnesses believe women must submit to all men. During their meetings for Field Service (meeting they have before they go door to door preaching) if there are 12 women there who have been believers (baptized) for 30+ years and then there is one 12 year old boy who have been baptized for 2 weeks, he is the one who will conduct the meeting and say the prayer. So this is a very interesting topic to me now that I am leaving that cult and it’s very dangerous false teachings.
I find my marriage going through this cyclical pattern where I am resistant to my husband’s authority and our marriage suffers so badly. Then I realize my sin and repent and try my hardest to treat my husband as my leader. We do well for several months before I backslide into old patterns. It makes me sad to think that my husband feels like a child in his own home. 😖 I too, like another commenter, grew up in a rocky, chaotic household and have trust issues. Vulnerability doesn’t come natural to me. I have defense mechanisms that kick in when things get deep and I want to run. It’s crazy that my marriage mirrors my relationship with God. When we are not doing so well, I’m usually in a spiritual low, not trusting God and rebelling against Him. I know the key is to remain in strong relationship with God because His word is the perfect defense against the enemy working his way into my life, destroying my marriage, and robbing my joy. Thank you Pastor Mike for this message. I’m going to refer to it often as a reminder of God’s perfect order.
I was brought up at church and have tried to find my connection to it as an adult a number of times but failed (because of one thing pr another). I don’t consider myself unquestionably religious any longer and often even not religious at all. However, I found much solace and connectedness in what you spoke about in this article. Thank you 🙏🏻
May God bless you and your family all the days of your life for teaching us The Truth! This is yes extremely difficult to do especially when your marriage is on the verge on divorced, however I thank God so much for this teaching today, I’ve read this passage many of times but never took it to seriously I would always allow my heart to get in the way and that’s because I was trying to be submissive to my husband on my own and not with Gods Strength but this time God made it very clear to me no matter how my husband feels or what he does it absolutely has nothing to do with my obedience to God, this time I’m not going to do this on my own understanding but The Lords🙌🏼 I know this was no coincidence for me to hear this and if God said to do this He’s The Only One we can truly trust that in the end no matter what happens it will be in Gods Will and Gods Will is always Good!🙌🏼 I pray for Gods strength upon all of us wives to submit to our husbands the way God told us to do, Father you know each one of our situations and only You can guide us through this I pray for Guidance, Strength, Love, Patience, Wisdom, Knowledge and everything we need spiritually to be able to be submissive to our husbands, We Praise Your Holy Name There is none not one like YOU!🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼 We ask these things in The Name of Jesus Christ Amen 🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼
Genesis 3:16 spoke to me and I’m sure other women that struggle with disorder of their relationships and submission to God first, then the husband. 6 years old and this sermon echos relevancy. I’m 26 years old and I’m in my first year of marriage. I’ve struggled in all my relationships with a strong desire to satisfy my other half, and in a nutshell being very dependent and needy because he becomes my source. The disorder of my relationships and priorities with Christ and my husband has caused us issues and it’s a blessing to have my eyes re-opened and be reminded of the right and working order.
I’m glad submission does not mean trust. I’m with a husband that is emotionally abusive, actually separated right now. I was listening to this to see if there is anything I have done wrong in the marriage. I am very depressed by this. It seems cruel to me that God would ask wives to submit to ungodly men(1 Peter 3). He can curse God in front of me, but I’m to submit. He can walk away from me and say F—k that, but I have to submit. He can dismiss my severe health needs, but I have to submit. All to show the world what? How does this glorify God? Something is not right here. Mike I think some practical examples would help like it means this but not this… If the husband is the leader then perhaps submission is when he is leading godly, otherwise what is there to submit to?
He’s so right when he mentions how men so often impose God’s instruction to wives, but conveniently neglect His marital instructions to men. I can only imagine how difficult it is for my wife to submit when I’m being a total jerk, but I’m sure it’s equally difficult to be Christ (as I am commanded) to my wife while seeing her every flaw. Thank you Lord for Your ever-present grace! Right now I’m going through this series as part of my daily morning time with God. Looking forward to tomorrow when I watch Mike’s vid on my responsibilities to my wife.
Your the only message making sense I saw this evening here. Jesus asks us ALL to submit, as he did, as this is the core of servant hood. We are called. I was so upset of seeing some people comments but then I was reminded where Jesus states people get offended easily these days (I agree regarding what you said about abuse…)But we are all equal in Christ Jesus. Races, genders, religions etc… We are not separated into division but all one in Christ Jesus. Then I saw your message. Thank you.
This philosophy on marriage is so beautiful and exactly what I needed. Thank God you were able to share this message! I needed to especially hear the part where you said marriage is FOR the glory of God, because I was concerned that submission in undesirable circumstances wouldn’t be later rewarded by God in heaven since marriage “WAS” the reward. I am no longer afraid of marriage now knowing that while marriage has its benefits, God acknowledges the responsibility and is willing to reward accordingly in heaven. A detrimental sacrifice on earth will still result in a reward in heaven, so I don’t have to fear my submission being taken advantage of. Thank you deeply God and this church for saving my marriage before it ever begins!
The issues you point out Pastor Mike regarding two people trying to be the leader and the battles is something I’m witnessing with my parents. You even accurately pointed out what happens when parents divide up certain responsibilities. ( I know now this approach came out of mistrust and mismanagenent with finances). Their marriage has not been wonderful to watch. And yes, my dad has unfortunately come out looking unreasonable while my mom gripes about him behind his back. There came a point where I realised she was actually poisoning my mind against my dad – whether it was her intention or not. Now, I’m asking God to change my heart towards my dad because I’m now very stubborn toward him. There’s so much bittnerness in my mom’s heart towards my father. So much pain and unforgiveness. Granted, its the same with my dad who often feels we always pick my mom’s side. Through this lesson I’m seeing the very issue with my parent’s marriage. And I can now learn what not to do if I get married.
At first, when I saw that the description included 1 Peter 3:1-6 without including 7, I wondered where this would go. But, after you mentioned God told the wives how they’re supposed to act as opposed to telling the husbands how their wives are supposed to act, I was like, “Okay, you’re pointing out how God is directly giving them their roles as opposed to the husband being expected to train submission into his wife. They have both been set aside to address what their roles are supposed to be individually within the marriage.”
Thank you, Mike, for all your insightful teachings – May the LORD continue to guide and bless you and your family! (Numbers 6:24-26) Also, another Hebrew translation of “wives be submitted to your own husband” is “wives be tenderly devoted to your own husbands” …a woman’s heart understands the depth of what God is talking about. Shalom!
This was a really helpful article. Also thank you for clarifying that the submission is to a woman’s husband. When I was lukewarm, this domineering chauvinist mindset that some Christian men have was very off putting. It means so much to know that this is God’s idea for the structure of marriage, since He totally knows what is best for us. My inner feminist/womanist reacted when I first read those passages, but at the same time, I was reading it with the mindset that I trust God. I guess my worry, before I started reading the Bible, was that women were some how seen as some slightly lesser human or something. While there seems to be an order to things, so far (New Testament and up to the beginning of Exodus) I don’t see that God treats women as less valuable in His sight. In my own life, I feel God’s love and care.
My take on this topic is as follows. Marriage is a “type” of the marriage of the Bride (church) and The Bridegroom (Jesus). The Bride must submit fully to the Bridegroom and in turn He loves her intensely. Paul says “This is a profound mystery – but I am talking about Christ and the church.” (Ephesians 5:32). It’s the same with the ancient hebrew marriage ritual being a “type” of the rapture. Check it out. The Bible is riddled with these patterns. The Author is Awesome! God bless you all!
Mike, thank you so much for having the guts to teach us women what our place in a marriage is. Christian marriage counselor teachers out there like Jimmy Evans needs to listen to your studies because he and all pastors are too afraid of women to tell us what we need to know about how to submit to our husbands They know that 80% of women are the tithers in the church and 80% of women buy all the marriage books and no author wants to offend these women by telling them the truth. You are brave! Please write a book! I got to tell you I was a Christian woman Liber until I read a book 8 years ago “Created to be his helpmeet” by Debi Pearl It revolutionized by marriage I realized how I controlling I was to my sweet hubby, who was a supervisor in the Defense department for many years. Every day he’d stay in his man cave, and I wondered why? I couldn’t find any pastor not even Jimmy Evans who is the renowned marriage conference speaker to tell us women what our role in the marriage is and how to to submit to our husbands and not argue with them. I felt so ashamed how I treated this sweet kind, thoughtful, tender man. I realized that if I was living with Jesus, I would have treated him the same way eventually. God bless you Mike!!!!
Just perusal this article for the first time, and I haven’t read the 1,259 comments. You mentioned Abigail properly rebelling against Nabal, and I always use her as an example myself. However, you said that she was the only woman who rebelled rightly that you could think of, and I just want to say that if Sapphira had rebelled against Ananias in Acts chapter 5, then the Lord wouldn’t have killed her for agreeing to tempt the Spirit of the Lord with her wicked husband.
I understand now after having watched your other article about how to be a good husband or man – basically, if we keep it simple and both do exactly as God commands, you won’t be in a bad marriage because you will both consistently be putting the other’s needs over your own. It’s a recipe for marital success but you have to stay consistent in your own path and pray that your spouse will too. If they aren’t, I suppose you should stick to your own path and pray pray pray that your spouse will find their way to the path too. AHA – click!
102 women gave this a 👎🏻😂. I’m not one of them! Love your ministry. Thank you and God bless 🙏🏻. Men and women think I’m crazy when I say feminism killed chivalry. I work in security and the chain of command is of the utmost importance and simple to understand why. Why can’t we be different but of equal importance?
This may sound odd, but I have no problem being submissive to my husband. God made him the man. Marriage is built off God, love, trust and obedience. I love God and he has given me and my spouse abundant love for each other! I can honestly say from the depth of my heart…I love my husband and he loves me! I thank the Almighty God for sending him in my life! God knew just what I wanted and needed. #foreverinlove! ❤
At 11 minutes, that’s such an important distinction I haven’t heard a pastor make before: submission is something a Godly woman offers to her husband and to her marriage, as to the Lord. Submission is not done to her, that’s abuse and a husband shouldn’t be obsessed w/ his wive’s submission. That would be controlling and the husband’s headship is service, not lording it over her or revelling in being the boss of her.
What I wished he’d covered is when/how a couple supposedly reaches the point when they “need” to have one of them make a decision the other doesn’t see as God’s will… rather than continuing to seek an alternative that both can agree to pursue… THAT’S the root issue that unlocks this whole debate. Is this “final deciding” happening after real communication or instead of it? When the “head” is also the one who gets to announce an “impasse” has been reached- over the other’s valid objection- that’s tyranny. The church should be a place where the wife can find support if her husband is using a false understanding of submission as a means to avoid hard discussions and the growth that’s only found on the other side of them. Jesus said He called us friends and I don’t have “head” friends in each grouping. Jesus doesn’t operate the way this teaching gets fleshed out in too many cases.
Dr Tony Evans has an incredible message to both husbands AND wives on the subject. He speaks of how husbands and wives are equal in essence but NOT in position. He also speaks about how wives talk to their husbands. It’s not always WHAT you say but HOW you say it. Tone, attitude and body language will determine how a husband takes a wife’s words. Tony is very thorough, these are just a couple things he mentions.
I’m glad that everyone understands that there are disagreements regarding Catholicism and doctrines and not against individual Catholics. Born Again believers do not condemn people, our goal is to share the truth in God’s Word and use the bible as our “doctrine”. I was raised Catholic and than became “Christian” after a very dangerous and sin filled life. My faith and or conversion was not solid because I did not read and follow the bible enough. I say this because I had doubts and questions and did not seek God’s truth enough. I “Backslid” for many many years but always knew God was real and that I was in sin. I came back to seek the Lord about 4 years ago. I “accepted Christ” again and went to my old Pentecostal church but again, had some doubts and or concerns about a few practices.. My wife and I prayed and studied the Word of God hard . We found bible based churches and rededicated our life to Christ and than moved to a distant County as we continued to seek God. By then, we were more grounded in the Word. We didn’t smoke, drink, steal etc. etc. and were faithful to our local church. We thought we were good Christians, but unfortunately real tests of faith and Christianity came our way. This is normal when people decide to seek the truth and be “Christian”. The devil will do anything to destroy believers. It wasn’t until God truly showed me I was a wretched, angry and impatient sinner that I came to true repentance. I was justifying my pride and aggression towards my wife.
Im sure that any women who has an issue with this principal most likely has been severely abused and controlled in a bad way… And these types of women dont know how to find a safe and healthy man to be able to submit to. This is such a beautiful and important message spoken so eloquently!!! Thank you Sir. 🙏
As a woman, the idea of submitting to a husband horrifies me not because I don’t want to do the will of God, but because of how many men throughout history have used this verse to imply that their wives are inferior and shouldn’t be involved in making decisions. If/When I choose a husband in the future, I would rather have a husband who considers me his equal in decision-making than an inferior like so many traditionally Christian men seem to believe. I was a child/teenager once, I hated not having my opinions listened to and the constant condescension, and marrying a strictly complementarian Christian man would likely be a similar experience. I would rather be sad and single for my entire life to preserve my personal autonomy and freedom than have a man who thinks a marriage is a leader-subordinate relationship and treat me like an adult child.
Women are to submit to Gods will first. She must have communication with the holy spirit to know when its gods will to submit to something her husband does in the Lord, such as if God want the man to go on a mission etc. But agreements with homelife is something both partners can make desicions on equally. A woman should know when NOT to submit as well.
I will admit that submission is easier but I can’t even come close to the idea of anyone or anything being responsible for my choices but me. I am utterly terrified at the the thought that someone else’s choices would determine my eternal fate. no! let me stand responsible for every detail of my life as much as possible. weather that is for my good or bad, I own my fate. For this in all my free will to chose I thank God every day and base a big chunk of the foundation of my faith in him. Jesus died for me so I could chose, not someone else choose for me regardless of what I do. I bow to no man only God, Because I choose to.
Actually,if the wife is smarter than the husband, then it is more reason for the husband to listen to the wife’s advice, and to show sacrificial love, to take her advice on board and make it as HIS decision for his marriage and family. This is what servant leadership means. A smart leader listens to his colleagues, weighs pros and cons etc, before making the decision. The husband should do likewise with his wife.
I have never seen anyone get this concept of wives submitting to their husbands right. What is wrong with what it says, and why do preachers “dance around” what it means? I mean, the answer is in the dictionary: verb (used with object), sub·mit·ted, sub·mit·ting. to give over or yield to the power or authority of another (often used reflexively). to subject to some kind of treatment or influence. to present for the approval, consideration, or decision of another or others: to submit a plan; to submit an application. to state or urge with deference; suggest or propose (usually followed by a clause): I submit that full proof should be required. verb (used without object), sub·mit·ted, sub·mit·ting. to yield oneself to the power or authority of another: to submit to a conqueror. Was that so difficult? Why would it mean something other than this? You said that husbands should not enforce submission. That is insane. I have been through two marriages. The insanity that ensues when a wife refuses to submit, the grief and troubles not submitting causes the husband, is very high. If the man is the head, and the wife undermines his authority, is he supposed to do nothing? If he tells her, she will become enraged. If he doesn’t tell her, he will be destroyed by her. It is such an awful position to be in for a man. Women en masse have followed the piper, Satan, with feminism. Satan says you don’t have to submit, women. But God does say you have to submit. It’s a simple choice, really. But once the man is destroyed by the wife’s disobedience, she simply goes to an attorney and takes the children and all his money, leaving him broken and alone.
We have got to stop bashing men. In your lecture about men loving the wife as christ loves the church you shot the arrow straight. Shoot the arrow straight for how women are also supposed to love and submit. We apologize for biblical instructions in regards to women wayyy too much but we bash the men. Shoot straight with the word of God towards both men and women. Hold each accountable
I am a wife and I agree with Pastor Mike in this article!! I am lucky though, that my husband is sooo loving and kind and does not make it unpleasant for me to submit. What makes it hard for me is that I have a strong personality and I’m a natural leader, and my husband is definitely more shy and introverted. Plus- patience is definitely a struggle for me 😬 so I tend to jump in and “wear the pants” way too often if I feel he’s not acting. Instead of outright disobeying him, I’m the wife who tends to put on a sad face and moan about a particular thing I want until he changes his mind. Lol this article was a helpful reminder that that is sin and I want to honor God by putting that in the past and walking in submission to my loving husband 😊 Thanks Pastor Mike
Am excited to watch, as Mike has a lot of great bible studies. So many pastors have twisted this concept into something so disgusting an abusive, and wonder why many women have left their “churches”. It is also upside down when people feel they are better respected in the world, than in the sanctuary with assumed brothers and sisters.
My husband wants me to pretend that we are not married. We do not live together because he moved out . He has moved on and started a relationship with another woman. He wants me to submit to a “divorced” type relationship. He told me to go find another husband five years ago WHILE I was going through cancer treatments, six months after I nursed him through his cancer. I told him to go ahead and get a lawyer if he wanted, but my Lawyer is Jesus Christ and he has told me NOT to sign anything. So, knowing that he is in the wrong, he just wants to pretend that we are not still married legally and tells others that we are divorced. We’ve been married 33 years. We have eight children together. Sorry, I won’t submit to pretending to be divorced. Yes, I’m bitter, who wouldn’t be?
Another thing that young Christian single women need to know is that part of submission is being wise in your selection of a husband in the first place. Having a deeper connection with the Spirit, knowing scripture, and acknowledging red flags as they appear for what they are is super important. Of course we are all very sinful, but you should never marry a man that you wouldn’t want to submit to. You are better off single if you cannot fathom trusting your husband. Think of yourself as the co-pilot. Equal in worth and helpful to fly the marriage plane while the Lord is your engine, your sky, your instruments, your radar, your everything good.
Mike, I heard Tim Warner break down Paul’s teachings in the Greek saying that the tense Paul used was in writing to the men, and instead of saying to the wives, “wives, submit to your own husband” it was more like, (to the men, who would then go teach it to their wives) “have your wives submit to their own husbands”. What has your study time found on this?
@mikewinger What would you say to the wife who constantly says to her husband “You have to love me as Christ loves my church” and then sends this to him as evidence that it’s not his place to address the issue of submission? If it’s abuse to mention submission, then it’s abuse to say “you must love me as Christ loves the church”.. especially when she then is the one who defines what that means
I can’t recall reading about any wife or woman usurping authority over a man in the bible. So I like your teaching that “submit” is to rank yourself under your husband or a person in authority. I also like how 1 Peter chapter 3 says that Sarah “obeyed” Abraham, and that husbands are to give honor to the wife, because we are “heirs together in the grace of life.” Love the teachable moment with Abigail and David, too. It is wise for a wife to step in when the husband is in disobedience to God’s authority. Thank you for your teaching!
Mike, I am a 42 yr old wife and mother who has known the call of the Lord on older women to teach these things. Having found a void when looking for older women to teach me when I was younger, I asked the older women why they weren’t doing it (in a respectful way, of course). MANY admitted that they felt ill-equipped to teach the younger generation that which they did not do or know to do. For example, but to cut right to the chase, they said because they were raised to go after women’s liberation and not prioritize homemaking (being a keeper at home/worker at home), but instead left home to pursue income (and independence), they said they either felt like they didnt know what to teach them specifically, OR they were shaming themselves by teaching younger women to do that which they had not done. So there is a gap, generationally, in this teaching. As a 42 yr old, I am eagerly looking forward to grayer hair and being the “aged” woman, so I can step up to that mandate and teach when it is mine to do so. In the meantime, what can a middle-age wife and mother do? I can love my husband, love my children, be discreet, chaste, kind, good, and submit to my own husband, SO THAT the Word is not blasphemed. Til then, should I sit on this teaching?? It has had my heart for a decade or longer, but I do not want to step out when it isnt the right place or time. I also want to encourage the older women to do their part in the body! I would very much love to discuss this further, if you are willing/able!
This is really “old” (like me) so again, unfortunately, I’m confident you will never see this. Nonetheless, here goes. I have always understood Eph. 5:21 to, I think as you “almost said,” speak to all Christians. The remainder of that idea (through verse 6:9), again I have always understood to mean, “Here are the various relationships you will have with other Christians, wives to husbands, children to their parents, employees to their ‘masters’,” where authority must exist to have orderly, peaceful and God honoring lives. How far off base am I? Once again I am thoroughly blessed at the sensitive yet unwavering manner in which you teach scripture, most of all with these controversial subjects. God bless you.
Yep, you have to include the whole scripture. The the Lord built in checks and balances to the marriage. Both my wife and I are “A” types personalities. It’s a joy to talk things over, and to have areas of responsibility that we are the primary in and then seek help from the other. It’s not perfect as neither of us is perfect yet, but she is my best friend and my strength.
This is why i don’t wanna get married. Ive always been the one who wanted to fulfill these roles but the other didn’t. I know we are supposed to fulfill our roles regardless if the other doesn’t fulfill theirs but the one that doesn’t only makes the others, who does want to fulfill their roles next to impossible to do. And miserable.. unless both are doing what God wants you to do… its not even worth the pain. If u are already married, sorry for you but i rather not deal with this. I haven’t been living a christian life long.. i been partying and having fun, only recently, started repenting and praying and reading the bible.. so i could be considered selfish for not wanting to get married and dont know that yet, but in past relationships, its always been pain and control, and unfairness and fighting and punishment from men.. a lot of punishment.. dominance and also men think they have some glorified existence while women are half human.
Genesis 3:16 To the woman He said: “I will greatly multiply your sorrow and your conception; In pain you shall bring forth children; Your desire shall be for (Lit. toward) your husband, And he shall rule over you.” 1 Corinthians 14:33 For God is not the author of confusion (disorder) but of peace, as in all the churches of the saints. 34 Let your women keep silent in the churches, for they are not permitted to speak; but they are to be submissive, as the law also says (Genesis 3:16). 35 And if they want to learn something, let them ask their own husbands at home; for it is shameful for women to speak in church. 36 Or did the word of God come originally from you? Or was it you only that it reached? 1 Timothy 2:11 Let a woman learn in silence with all submission. 12 And I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man, but to be in silence. 13 For Adam was formed first, then Eve. 14 And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived, fell into transgression (Genesis 3)..
As far as,not agreeing on an issue, this is how I teach couples. Let God decide it. Both of you sit down and write what you want. Now both hold hands and pray over the papers. Now toss a coin. I recommend the woman be tails and the husband gets heads always. Then follow God’s plan unquestioningly. It’s fair. It’s Godly. It leads to the best choices.
SUBMISSION As I looked at a woman(Lawyer), I discovered she was married to a carpenter. Looking at the woman (Lawyer), I discovered she was too PROUD of her title and not only that, she is even arrogant before her husband. Looking at such marriage, I discovered it will not stand the test of time. As I looked at a Pastor, I discovered he has a wife that never opens her mouth to utter a WORD(derogatory) and as such, the man was so pleased. As I looked at another Pastor, I discovered he married his wife out of BEAUTY(false) and as a result, did not wait to hear from God if the woman is truly his wife(mystery) or not. Now, looking at the fall of man at the GARDEN of EDEN, I discovered the original PLANS(mystery) of God was for the TWO to live forever in the body of the FLESH through his anointing but because of DISOBEDIENCE, they were meant to LIVE for a TIME (mystery) and a TIME (mystery of mystery) in the FLESH before they will now LIVE forever either happily or not in the soul state. Now before the FALL, woman was equal to the man in all things except ONE THING. What is the thing? What is the thing? Yes, a woman is never, never considered EQUAL with her husband before God but as man fell at the garden, it became even more. Yes, a man is tied to the LAW of God and a woman is tied to the LAW of the man provided she is married to the man. But once the man dies, the woman is no longer TIED(mystery) to the LAW of the man but to another LAW! What law is that ? What law is that? A widow is either tied to the law of Christ if she is a born again or the law of the devil if she is a sinner.
It is really important to understand the heart of God I this I feel. When the ‘submittion’ is out of balance or the ‘loving like Christ’ isn’t there or distorted through passive aggressive behaviour for example. There is damage to both and the marriage. Many will disagree but I left my marriage after 23yrs because this damage was destroying me. My Christian husband would not change. Thank God that he is loving and forgiving.
Can you go further into detail about what is abuse? What should wives NOT be submitting to? And what happens when they don’t submit and the husband becomes enraged and violent? Or takes away her access to money/vehicle/friends? What if there’s no physical abuse but he controls everything and is aggressive towards the kids or endangers them? I wish the church would stop being willfully blind to the massive tidal wave of abusive marriages who tried to follow the “wives submit” mantra. And conveniently ignore the passage that says we are to submit to each other. If you truly believe what you preach then lay out what women should do in the scenario I described above.
Submission of the woman was interwoven into creation before the fall. The man is the head. Period. The woman is not. She is the helper. Not the other way around. When the woman does not submit, all she does is create chaos. She destroys the man’s ability to love her as she needs. The unsubmissive wife is her own worst enemy.
Being submissive is not that same as being dominated and I think that’s where the confusion is with many people. When a woman submits to her husband, it doesn’t mean she becomes a slave to him. it means, she submits to her part in what she is supposed to do as a wife. Both men and women play their parts in a marriage to one another. This what submissiveness in a marriage actually means. And yet adam still ate it. So it goes without saying if men were suppose to be leaders then adam should have been have said no to eating thrsay forbidden fruit, but did it anyway. So much for leading…
Grow some balls gentlemen. It says submit to your husband that’s what it means. How many times have I been sickened as I have to sit and listen to pastors dance around the issue to avoid offending the women in this country that are out of control. When the Bible calls me out on my stuff I don’t get to rearrange it around to suit myself
Hi! My dad is really abusive towards me. My mom tries to stand up to him and protect me. But the God says that wives should submit to their husbands. Does that mean that my mom should just let my dad abuse me and does that mean that if my mom stands up for me God would like it more if my dad abuses me and if my mom just agrees with him and lets him abuse me and one time my dad told my mom that it was a mistake marrying her and that he hated her. So in a way he doesnt love me anyway since he said that about her and everyone knows that if he didnt marry my mom I wouldnt be here. Edit: nevermind lol when i wrote this i was in the beginning of the vid you just cleared everything up. But i guess my mom would still and will always be scared of my dad or whatever
So here’s an issue I would like some clarity on: If my husband says I said something I know I did not say, am I supposed to submit to his judgment and agree to that? Conversely, if do tell him something and he insists I did not tell him, am I to submit to his judgement and agree that I didn’t tell him?
So I watched this, as well as the sermon on the calling on husbands. If I’m understanding correctly, the man makes the decisions, but those decisions should always be in his wife’s best interest because her needs come before his needs? In this situation, men might feel their own needs don’t matter, and women that their opinions and expertise are not valued. What is the best way to deal with these feelings? For example, I would never feel ok with eating while my husband went hungry. He would never be ok with making a major decision if I were in total disagreement. Any advice on how to deal with this type of thing? Maybe I’m being too literal?
Love this article but highly disagree on us not correcting our wives it tells us to cleanse our wife with the word daily. Also if we see a brother or sister fall into sin we are suppose to reprove them in love and my bride is my sister so if she doesn’t submit and she is being abusive I can’t stay quiet I have to bring up the verse and correct her in love to submit. All said in love mike love your content me and my wife love the articles thank you for your service in christ 🙏
Telling your wife what’s in the bible regarding submission is abuse? That’s worded rather strongly. One might even think that demeans the term abuse, or is laying a false charge against a husband. But it’s not abuse for another man to teach my wife that same thing, right? I get where you’re trying to go with that, but incorrect execution.
I know you’re trying to use humour. I get it, you’re trying to make a point – but please don’t call husbands knuckleheads, jerks or idiots. It buys into worldly feminism every so subtly. Apart from that I really appreciated your message dude – really solid. I’ve watched alot of your articles and I’m loving your work.
Firat I have to say that I like this young man and his teachings.. you can tell he loves the Lord and that God has given him much wisdom which I am sure came from much studying in the word.. I like his style and doesnt mind admitting he may not know it all or that he could be wrong and I dont see an ounce of arrogance.. his face literally shines with the love of God!
I still struggle with this. And I have heard different interpretations. What is wrong with coming to mutual agreements? What if the husband wants to let’s say move to china all of a sudden? I would say no. I am trying to understand and trying to come around to this view but I am not sure that I can. Perhaps it works if the man is submitted to Christ. But I have seen this make abusive husbands more abusive. Lastly the treating a spouse like a child can go both ways. No adult likes to be treated like a child. I think perhaps in making your point you could use specific examples of what you think submission is vs. not. Again this is definitely a hard topic but worth while. Is submission: my way or the highway?
Compare the comments of this article to those in the article about the husbands’ duties. You will notice that men usually say that they should give their lives for their wives everyday, to love them while they merely must respect men. And here, most women are saying “I won’t submit to my husband”. Therefore, the problem is with modern women.
I am not married, however if I was, I would prefer my wife and I getting together and discussing and making major decision together, rather than me being solely in charge and the head of every decision made. Rather than her submitting to me or me submitting to her I believe the best way is to make decisions together after we discussed and ananlized the problem.
We need to remember that St. Paul was the Apostle to the Gentiles. I’ve seen translations of this passage that say, “Wives, submit to your OWN husbands.” As opposed to someone else’s husband, perhaps? This could be about the pagan man’s sovereignty over his wife’s sex life…Gentiles would have passed their wives around to one another like a whiskey bottle around a campfire. The men of ancient times saw their wives as property, to do with as they pleased. The Greek word for woman was “walking womb”…of course she didn’t have a brain in her head; she didn’t need one! Seriously, to hear some fundamentalist male preachers, you would think that women are too stupid to be saved without her “male spiritual head” telling her how. We also have to remember how unlearned gentile women would have been (as opposed to Priscilla, a Jewish woman, who discipled the already-learned Apollos, since he needed some correction).
I’m getting married in a month and while I am naturally more “submissive” I guess, more go-with-the-flow, this chafes. Maybe because I see my nature as a potential to turn into a doormat and to let other people hurt me. (Not my fiancé, definitely not on purpose) a close family member recently hurt me (and I mean really hurt me, tear me down with their words) and have just taken it. I don’t like this about myself and am struggling to find a way to correct it, but then I hear and read about women being submissive and I’m like someone please explain the balance. How do I “submit” (does that word make anyone else shudder?) And still gain the ability to stand up for myself? Because now there’s a rift between me and this family member and I am still wounded and I don’t want to feel this way again.
A very good treatment of a difficult subject. The problem is tthat some men use Scripture as an excuse to abuse their wives. They make a mockery of Biblical teaching. No woman should ever study with a msn who quotes Scripture as he demands unreasonable obedience. You are so right, that many times the whole teaching on marriage, focusing only on one aspect . It would be wonderful if every young couple could be counseled about how a marriage should work…and be taught how to work together…with Gid as their mutual head…
If your wife is not submitting to you but proclaiming to be a Godly woman and you as the husband have double and triple checked you are doing your part than you should lead your wife spiritually in the correct matter of submission. It’s the husband job to present his wife without a blemish to the Lord bearing her sin onto himself and guiding her in the correct manner
This was soooo good! This is the way I was taught. My heart breaks for marriages today.. One thing he didnt add which I think is important. A woman who has a Godly husband that is first listening to God and obeying God is a blessed woman and wife, and how secure she can feel being under him. for when the husband has the final say, if its wrong, it will be the husband whom God will chastise… This is truth young people… you wont always like heeding it as he says, but if you do, God has a way of honoring your submition with time and you will be so glad that you did.. remember who you are really doing it for.. God.. I remember our Sunday school teacher saying just what this young man said.. if you have a problem submitting to your husband, in reality you have a problem with submitting to God.. Submission is a good thing..
Coming from a broken home and embracing the feminist movement, I did not believe in marriage. Before becoming a Christian, I was in a relationship for 4 years and told bf at the time that marriage was not an option. I became a believer. (He did not). As I dove into scripture, I learned about the biblical model for a marriage and the roles of men and women. I was not offended but I was shocked to learn how different it was from what I had seen in my parents marriage and I believed about marriage. I embraced the biblical model. I ended the relationship. Even though I now believed in marriage, I knew I could not submit to my bf at the time for various reasons and that if we married, it would not be divorce proof. I stayed single and dedicated myself fully to God and ministry as a teacher. Years later, I met the man whom I have been married to 15 years. It has been easy to submit to him specially because I feel loved by him. Our marriage is not perfect but it is solid and strong. We will be together until death do us part and I am glad I met God’s word in time to correct my walk and enjoy my marriage that is truly a blessing. The fruit of our love is our 10 yr old son. I can only wish that we have modeled for him what I pray for him when he grows up – a marriage with an ideal helper who he will love and care for and she will submit and care for him in return. I pray my testimony will speak to someone’s need today. I will gladly answer questions that may help others as well. Have a blessed day!
Abigail and Esther rightly did not submit to their husbands, but Sarah and Sapphira (perhaps others) wrongly submitted and suffering resulted. One more case where I think submission would be unwarranted – clear sin. I.e. – co-signing a false tax return. Participating in abusive child-rearing practices. etc. Cf. Peter & John when released from the Sanhedrin & told not to preach Jesus. Clearly very much wisdom & discernment is needed.
fine I admit this is not a typo but then this begs the ever tormenting question of why? am I morally and intellectually inferior to my husband? A man who perpetually rejects Jesus? Why does he have this automatic right in a marriage to be elevated to the status of God in undeserved authority? what is the error in a woman or me, that this is commanded to be done by default? Why does it hurt my feelings to no end? why does this hurt so bad? its not my husband who is hurting me in this But God himself? please Lord help me to understand. I pray for wisdom and discernment. I want nothing greater then to be close to you, you who are my master. You who I desire to bow down to with all my heart. you Jesus, God I love and respect with every fiber of my being. I would gladly worship you forever of my own free will you gave me.
Don’t marry a man who has no concept of this or one who is a man child no matter how comfortable he makes you feel or no matter how much fun you have with him (pure fun, not the other kind ) lol Women please live in Gods word so you can discern who he is before marriage. Make sure he studied what it takes to be a Godly man and lives it. Don’t ignore red flags. That is the Holy Spirit showing you things. it’s better not to be married at all than to be married to an abuser or a neglectful man. Abuse can affect your walk with God. It’s just not worth your precious relationship with God.
I have a sincere concern regarding your comment @36:30 saying the husband will always have the final say in the making of decisions where there is disagreement. He is taking on the role of an autocrat-anything the wife does is only because she is permitted to do so by the husbands agreement. Therefore what choice is there really for her? For when the husband agrees she is allowed and when he disagrees she is not allowed. She lives a life permissible by her husband and if it pleases him. Please don’t paint us all as triggered,post modern feminists for wanting to make real, meaningful, life decisions within our marriages.
12:50 Don’t quite agree here. If you’re the spiritual leader of your home, you should be capable of providing some degree of direction or even admonishment, the same way at least you would to another brother or sister in Christ. If you can’t point your spouse to scripture, how do you lead? Would sending them this article be abuse too then, just via 3rd party? — Obviously this can be abused or otherwise misused, but the loving and honest application of Christian correction should have its place. As someone who has wisdom and counsel I value, I would hope my spouse would do the same for me.
I realized you said that if you’re dating then you’re not called to submit. I am currently engaged and I’m certain that the Lord has put us together. It’s been a struggle and we’ve had a lot of growing (and still do) to do before we get married. I’ve noticed most times when we’re together I find myself naturally submitting to his decisions just to keep down the confusion or disagreements. Sometimes I do make the decisions though but again we are engaged so, is this a bad thing (me submitting to him before marriage)?
Around 36:45, @MikeWinger mentions the husband’s loss of authority due to infidelity– it’s grounds for divorce, the wife is no longer under the husband etc.. If they don’t divorce and separate, how does that wife navigate day-to-day life with her husband? Living like she’s not under her husband seems like it’d provoke tension and more disrespect. . . But submitting to the dude who broke your covenant would be crummy too. So what’s the right approach?\r Sorry for the weird ask — just trying to understand how we are called as wives to behave where there is breakdown of the husband’s authority but the couple stays together. Am I misunderstanding what Pastor Mike was saying?
Mike, with the deepest respect, when two adults disagree about a choice which impacts them both, they can talk it over. They can state goals, preferences, strategies. They can compare knowledge and insight. They can use their reason to list different options, their pros and cons My partner and I make choices this way: together. It is not a competition, it’s a collaboration. We don’t get into arguments but discussions. Nobody looses a rational discussion – we come to a consensus. I understand you are are talking about something you consider to be the holy way of doing marriage, but that’s just it. People are different, couples are different, families are different, cultures and situations are different. There is no single model of successful relationship to rule them all. Everybody has to build their own model from the bottom up. Some will use ideas from your Christian model, and make it work like that. Some, like my parents, will use a different, still Christian model (both my parents have their own heads, thank you very much). Others will not. They should not be condemned. But I guess the big difference is that you think in a relationship I am accountable to god. I think in a relationships I am accountable to my partner. I just don’t see what god has to do with the equation…
I totally disagree that a husband should force the wife to submit to him, that’s non scripture. It abuse! A husband must love the wife, and endure in the relationship in patient and understanding. But I believe a wife first must submit to the Lord, get the Word of God in her spirit and when you apply bible, and act upon it, as the bible commands to do, ultimately as a consequence she understands to submit to her husband as the head of the marriage, because that’s what the bible says to her, and accept husband choices, trusting him that choices comes from the guidance of the Spirit. Man should also agree that sometimes women makes better choice that men. On the other side, most unconverted women have an issue with submission, because they don’t apply biblical principles. They don’t know the Lord. This also affects rising godly children and well.
How about studying the actual meaning of the Greek word translated “head” as used in the first century? Hint: it had nothing to do with authority. 2nd hint: It has everything to do with “source”, as we still use it in “the head of a stream.” This is VERY relevant to the flow of 1 Corinthians 11… it’s all about how men and women honor God by acknowledging and living according to his Creation. Men are to be masculine, and women to be feminine. Because it honors our Creator. Woman was made out of man. But man comes through woman. This is about “source.” Not authority.
I wonder if you could speak to the biblical submission of a wife dealing with a husband trying to force her into submission into HRM? Those inside the movement have told me I should just submit myself and my children and the Lord will take care of us if he is wrong…in which I fully believe, but for wisdoms sake, why would I put them and myself in the situation in the first place. The Lord gives wisdom for a reason…
Usually Mike is a great teacher, but he spends most of this article teaching about Nabal and his wife. How often do such life or death disagreements come up? I think he emphasizes it for the same reasons he says other pastors walk it back when trying to teach about submission, cultural pressure. He also falls into the cultural trap of mocking men, referring to “knucklehead husbands” when there were no such negative references about wives on his teaching about being a good husband. I appreciate you Mike but this does not help as much as it could or should
Into Bible-gateway I did a keyword search for “putting others needs above my own” and NOTHING came up. I remember the Bible talking about ESTEEMING others above ourselves. I remember the 2 greatest commandments including to love others AS YOURSELF. But nowhere can I find a verse saying to put others needs ABOVE our own. Can anyone help me out with this? He kept repeating that phrase as if it is a biblical norm but I have never heard it before and can’t find it.
Husband head of household: compared to the actions of Christ. Meaning being right doesn’t matter, being popular doesn’t matter, being given the house the car the great kids. The husband sacrifices and protects. He protects his household like Christ compared himself to a mother hen. Keeping the foxes at bay. The hen cannot be 100% successful at protecting his home from predator or death. But he is someone to turn to in crisis, the proof that The proof of Christ. His behavior inspires. Learning the ways and collecting knowledge. He learns from his mother. Mentored by his teachers. Learn from his wife. Learn from his children. Learn from his aging. The man teaches the woman how to submit as the husband submits to god. Man teaches his children how to submit to God. No one is ultimately responsible for this or at direct fault for a man’s failure. It’s an internal behavior, over generations the behavior is corrected as well.