The Bible condemns sexual immorality and sex before marriage, stating that it is inappropriate to have sex in any form before marriage and to be naked in one another’s presence. Intimacy before marriage should be practiced with caution to ensure it remains within the bounds of Christian values. Kissing can be a meaningful part of intimacy, but it depends on what you mean by “making out.”
In today’s world, it is believed that sex before marriage is acceptable and should be based on the choice of both individuals in the relationship. Views on physical affection and intimacy before marriage can vary among different religious and cultural beliefs. In some religious traditions, engaging in premarital physical intimacy, including cuddling, may be considered a sin.
Chastity means not having any sexual relations before marriage and expressing complete fidelity to husband or wife during marriage. Physical intimacy between husband and wife is beautiful and sacred, ordained of God for the creation of children and for the expression of love within marriage. Sexual immorality is any sexual activity that happens outside of marriage, including adultery (infidelity) and fornication (premarital or extramarital sex).
The Bible promotes complete abstinence before marriage, and sexual intercourse before marriage is off-limits for those who follow Jesus. However, there are instances where fornication is considered a sin, as it is inconsistent with the nature of sex, marriage, and the family.
In conclusion, the Bible condemns sexual immorality and sex before marriage, emphasizing the importance of maintaining a healthy balance between personal and religious values.
📹 How Far Is Too Far in Christian Dating? (When Is Kissing a Sin?)
Does the Bible give Christians a list of things they can do before marriage? How far is too far in Christian dating? Can Christians …
What does God say about intimacy?
Sex in marriage unites couples. Sex in marriage is not just about God, but also about uniting husband and wife. Genesis 2:22–25 says, “Then God made a woman from the man’s rib. The man said, “This is now my flesh and bone. She shall be called woman, for she was taken out of man.” This intimacy between man and woman was always meant to happen in a certain way. It was meant to happen between a man and a woman in a special relationship with God.
Is it wrong to be intimate before marriage?
It’s up to you whether to have sex before or after marriage. There’s no right or wrong answer. Don’t feel pressured into making a decision that makes you uncomfortable.
What are the benefits of having sex before marriage?; Are there any negative consequences of having sex before marriage?; Questions to ask before marriage about sex. Physical intimacy is important for all people, and sex is an important part of a romantic relationship. People’s views on sex outside of marriage are often influenced by culture, religion, faith, and spirituality.
Is it a mortal sin to kiss before marriage?
Thomas doesn’t say kissing is sinful or that making out is not. He says lustful pleasure is sinful if you consent to it. Kisses and touches are sinful if they tempt someone into lust or if they are done for sexual pleasure outside marriage. This is important. The Church doesn’t have a rule about how many kisses a Catholic may kiss their love interest. Each person must decide if they are eating too much peanut butter and if their kisses and touches are lustful. What is lustful pleasure? Our desire for sex is good. Arousal is a natural response to stimuli. Arousal is good and normal. But arousal is the body’s preparation for sex. If it happens outside marriage, it can lead to sin.
What level of intimacy is okay before marriage?
There’s no right level of physical intimacy before marriage. It depends on the couple. Two people might decide to only kiss and hug before marriage. Another couple might go all out and not worry about marriage. Some people wait until marriage to have sex. Your level of physical intimacy depends on you and your partner. 5 ways a physical relationship before marriage affects your relationship. Having sex before marriage affects us emotionally, mentally, and physically. When you have sex, you give your body to someone. It’s vulnerable and has pros and cons.
What blocks intimacy with God?
We usually think of sin as doing bad things. But these actions come from wanting to do what we want, not what God wants. This attitude and actions make us distant from God. Of all the sins Christians commit, idolatry seems to block intimacy with God the most. Idolatry is when we depend on something or someone other than God to meet our needs. To have an intimate relationship with God, we must first identify and remove our idols.
4. Keep building your relationship with God. (Mark 1:35) Many of us are unintentionally damaging the relationships that matter most to us. We think our marriages, friendships, and relationships with our kids will stay strong because they started out that way. All relationships need care to stay healthy.
What does the Bible say about sexless?
Pray and be devout together. The Bible says that married couples should not have sex unless they agree to. 1 Corinthians 7:3-5 says that spouses may agree to not have sex for a limited time to pray more. This passage also says husbands and wives should “come together again” to avoid temptation. If you’re not having sex, talk about it, pray, and agree on when you’ll have sex again. Be kind and give each other space. Sex can be painful and difficult to talk about, especially if you’ve been abused. Sex in marriage can be hard. This is a chance to show self-sacrifice in marriage. Be as kind and patient with your spouse as Jesus was with his. If needed, give each other time to process how God is working. Marriage is not about you. Your marriage and sex life are not about you. Marriage is about serving each other and glorifying Christ. Marriage can show us the gospel. Even if my marriage is sexless, I will still love my spouse. It may seem like you’re missing out. Even without sex, the Lord gives you everything you need to be a faithful follower and spouse.
Is cuddling before marriage a sin?
It’s not sinful, but it’s unwise. God says sex before marriage is sinful, not kissing or cuddling. We are wired to desire sex, and kissing and cuddling triggers that desire.
What happens if a girl lost her virginity before marriage?
You can’t tell if someone is a virgin. However, there are many ways to seem not to be a virgin. Never admit to having had sex. Keep it. In India, a woman is considered a virgin until her hymen is broken, which causes bleeding. Tell your husband you were active in sports and damaged your hymen. On the first night, act like you’re having sex for the first time. Act like you’re having sex for the first time. YouTube has lots of videos to help you prepare. Don’t worry. If you don’t have sex anymore, your vagina will go back to normal. Get a hymenoplasty to fix your hymen. This is the best way to restore your vagina.
Doctors on Lybrate offer suggestions for information only. The content on Lybrate is not meant to replace your doctor’s advice.
Is it a sin to touch your partner?
Some Christian students believe sex is only for married people. They can do other things until then. You can do a lot of things that aren’t holding hands or having sex.
September 14, 11:24 a.m. Last updated September 26, 2022, at 12:03 p.m. September 14 at 11:24 a.m. Last updated on September 26, 2022, at 12:03 PM.
Is making out a sin?
Anytime you get physical with someone, you create strong ties and bonds. Having a sexual drive is not bad. Making out is not a sin, but it can be sinful. A man’s job in a relationship is to honor God and the woman he is dating. Think about why you want to make out. You want to honor your body.If you’re making out just to please someone, you may not be honoring your body. For many guys, making out is confusing because of physical ramifications. It’s best to avoid this. Discover why you’re choosing to make out. You don’t need physical validation or connection in a dating relationship. “Your goal in dating is to honor the other person well.” -JD Rodgers.
Is it a sin to touch your private parts?
Conclusion: Touching yourself in a sexual manner is a sin. Touching yourself sexually is a sin in Catholic teachings. It is wrong to touch yourself sexually. It is against the sanctity of our bodies, involves intention and consent, defiles marriage, and can lead to addiction. The Church also says that we can ask God for forgiveness. Through confession, repentance, and commitment to holiness, we can find healing, restoration, and the grace to resist temptation.
May we all live in purity and glorify God.
📹 Sex before Marriage | Christian Perspective
What does the Bible say about sex before marriage? Was sex created only for making children? How far is okay? I have already …
Hello! 13 year old female here! Here is my take, I am fully Christian, I love God and Jesus. But I only became this way a year ago and honestly at 11-12 I sinned so much, way more than a regular child should. But once I turned 13 I realized that what kind of life is that? An inhuman life! I felt ashamed, sad, angry at myself, and then I started going to church, started reading the Bible and started following God. I may be very young to decide but once I am older and married I want children. I am fully towards after marriage sex, I only want to.. expose? Myself to once man and one man only. And only let one man explore me and have my children! No judgment here But I find sleeping with many men/women is inhuman and gross. Like I said, I only want one man explore me, I am not willing to ever ever ever expose myself to multiple people. Ah, I was kind of ranting there but God bless you!! Also you are so pretty🥺💗
Your delivery came from a loving perspective and was well referenced. I think it’s important for Chrisitans to not feel shame around this topic…especially young people who are especially hormonal and new to experiencing normal things/feelings that come with being human and are completely normal. While I feel differently I respect your message and it may help those who are religious or curious about becoming religious. Thanks for sharing
Thank you for making this article. I’m a Christian and I’ve always believed in no sex outside of marriage, and now I have my first serious boyfriend and I’m stressing out figuring out where the line is for me and where those boundaries our. While he has different beliefs to me regarding sex, he’s very respectful and we communicate well, and I want to be able to make this work.
As a twenty year-old single male, profoundly changed by Jesus and The Word of God, with a grand total of zero experience when it comes to relationships, this article was extremely helpful. It’s very easy to let thoughts and feelings plague your mind when it comes to sex. But this article has reinforced that God has a plan for my future, so I will trust in Him. Thanks, Amy! Subscribed. 🙂
I really appreciated some context on the subject. And you did your research. Kudos to you! I saw the same as you ” Sex before marriage is immoral and wrong” most of my boyfriends understood this. But one didn’t. Or rather, he understood it but chose to ignore scripture. I’m glad I got out of that relationship before I lost my V card. But there is something that I now don’t quite agree with. My current relationship is filled with understanding, support, and love. He has never faltered in the way he treats me. We’ve been together for 2+ years now. I know he’s right. I know it in my deepest self. We’ve been engaged for a while. So I finally stopped waiting. And he hasn’t been with anyone else at all. Just my 2 cents. Anyone who sees this, ignore me if you want. I’m just saying my truth on this matter.
As a Christian, I believe whether you have sex before or after marriage is your choice as long as you don’t feel pressured and as long as you’re doing for the right reasons. I also believe as Christians and whatever religious beliefs you have we shouldn’t judge one other for our choices on what we did or do with our bodies. Me I wanted to have sex after marriage to, but it didn’t work out cause I was so pressured. Do I regret it? No because I learned that not being a virgin doesn’t make you stupid, less of a Christian, or less of a human being. I gained a lesson in life I gained an experience. There are people like myself who never wanted to loose it but did and we shouldn’t bash one another for it. If you’re a virgin waiting for the right person or even marriage then that’s okay, if you lost it before it’s okay, we should learn to respect each other’s decisions and continue to love one another. Thank you for the article by the way I loved it and appreciated it✨✨God bless you
praśhāntātmā vigata-bhīr brahmachāri-vrate sthitaḥ manaḥ sanyamya mach-chitto yukta āsīta mat-paraḥ Chapter 6,verse 14(Bhagwat Geeta) Translation—Thus, with a serene, fearless, and unwavering mind, and staunch in the vow of celibacy, the vigilant yogi should meditate on me, having me alone as the supreme goal. No matter which god are you following He/she always told us to be in the way of religion.I also respect Jesus.Love from India mam.
Sex before marriage can really mess up your body, soul and spirit. I learn this from the people who has done it. But I also heard how sex after marriage can be a worship to God. I was shocked by learning these. Now I’m looking forward to marriage and lucky enough I’m sill a virgin and I’ll keep that way till marriage.
Thank you for a rather normal and up to date woman perspective on that question. I would rather be productive than think about sex more than necessary which is my current goal. Interesting how religious perspective has helped to reduce my frustration about physical pleasure and so on. I am 24 and also came to appreciate wisdom of the Holy Scripture at around 20 years old. Thought the best thing to do would be to have enough during youth rather than have regrets later. Since than I have started to feel really tired and just want to “never have sex anymore”. How much better could the quality of sex life be for every person if taught by adults at appropriate time and with spiritual consideration. Also considering how much time has passed and how many changes there were in social institutes and other basic things such as tap water. Easy to stay clean nowadays and prevent conflicts among neighbours\r. Could “Do not hit on another guy`s girl” be a wisdom for modern life? Almost unfathomable how there seems to be so much sexual frustration among modern youth considering availability of educational materials.
I feel that people teach waiting to have sex until marriage kind of like a prosperity gospel — that you’re going to have mind blowing sex just because you waited. This is not true, and most people can confirm this. Of course that doesn’t mean it isn’t a special moment, but if neither you or your partner have had sex with each other before, it takes time and practice to get to know each other’s bodies. Some women I know felt disappointed after their first time because although it was a special moment, the sex wasn’t as good as they thought it would be; they had been told that it would be out of this world the very first time. But they told me that as they continued in their marriage, they continued to get to know each other’s bodies. Don’t set up super high expectations for your first time, expect it to be new and a little awkward (not necessarily emotionally awkward), but that’s totally ok!
I have a question. Me and my boyfriend live together and we are both Christians. I’m confused about what the God views as marriage. We are serious and plan on being married within the next 4 years. We have been together for two years now. We practically act as if we are married already but haven’t because we are young. Does it count once theres a legal document? A ceremony? Does there need to be witnesses? Can it be between us and God? I don’t know if there is a difference between having a paper saying we are legally married or not. We plan to be married, but I’m almost 18 and hes just turned 19 so we want to wait at least a year or two before actually getting married. Do you have any advice? I feel like I should stop but it’s so hard because he wasn’t raised Christian so hes never been told sex before marriage is wrong. It’s hard to bring it up because I allowed it to happen in the first place but I’ve always had so much guilt in my heart. I’ve told him about how I feel and we both came to the conclusion that we are committed and will marry soon so that we think it’s okay. I’m just so scared I’m going to go to hell because I dont have a piece of paper
My girl broke up with me a few days ago bc I wanted to marry her before we had sex. She finally had enough. It’s tough, but I think about how the sacrifice of that relationship pales in comparison to the sacrifice God did for me when He sent His son Jesus to die on the cross for me. Is there anyway you can do a article on dealing with a breakup bc of your devotion to honoring God? Loved this article! Subscribed!
thank you very much for sharing this… i’m still 16 and nowadays was confused by the weird cultures of having s3x before marriage. i know it’s a bad bad bad bad thing, i just confused why do so many people do this? Jesus already warned but why they still doing that? 🙁 i’m sorry for my bad english + grammar. (still learning)
As a christian that is confused about this topic, I think this only has set an argument of the benefits of waiting until marriage to have sex (those which I totally agree with) and the risks not to. But it didn’t make an argument about whether it is actually a sin or not. I mean, you can honour God before marriage by making the decision of not to kiss your fiancé(e) until marriage, and doing so has its own risks (namely, sexual arousal), but it doesn’t make it a sin to kiss your boyfriend or girlfriend. I wonder if it is the same with sex and I’m looking for it, but I feel that this article didn’t set it off, but rather assumed it inside all that the word “porneia” includes.
Wait so, I am engaged and my #1 goal before dating was to wait till marriage. The minute we got engaged, I didn’t reach that goal, but I was happy I waited till THAT point but also I was sad about it because I didn’t know whether it was sinful or not. My fiancé always says “We’re getting married anyways” but when he says that I KNOW it goes deeper than that before marriage and I hate when he says that. He doesn’t understand the VALUE of waiting and what it does. It still makes me a bit sad. So you say if we ask for forgiveness and everything, that it won’t be too late for God, but my question is once I ask again, will our marriage have the value I still want it to have? Or will any value be ruined? Even IF I ask, and I continue staying away from temptation until I get married. I have deep belief in christianity (I’m 18 btw) sorry if the question may be a bit difficult to answer.
Seen alot of divorce which, has completely destroyed my image of marriage. I’m a deist who’s in a relationship and happy. However, I respect the choices of others on how they approach sex/ dating etc. If people want to be single / celibate, let em. I f people choose wait or don’t, so be it. We all come from different walks of life. Sometimes I not even interested in physical activity. Hell, I sometimes like to focus on other interests like fighting ( martial arts ). Well I try anyway lol. Thanks for letting me vent.
Great insight, however you should do it with someone you love and in a relationship with, and from general perspective it’s up to both people in the relationship to decide when they should have sex and they should have it when they feel ready to and not necessarily when someone tells them or use your personal religion to dictate how someone should life there personal life. Also when we were teens we were all going to hormonal changes and puberty and sex it does happen sometimes during that time. I had sex when I was 15, a teen back then so it should be understandable, but now I’m an adult. I did it, nothing happen and life goes on, but it would be insane if God held that against me over something I did when was young. Like it’s not like God when kill you if you do it before marriage. I mean love is a very powerful and amazing force of nature and one things leads to another and sometimes it just happens. Also what about people who don’t believe in marriage and prefer the single life? Can they have sex if they never get married? Also hope you acknowledge the other people who don’t believe in this either, but thank you for explaining this from your perspective. People need to understand there are different lens people need to understand and look through of sex.
When I was praying about it holy spirit told me read 1cor 3 and I was not even opening a Bible. He convicted me of this verse 17 If any man defile the temple of God, him shall God destroy; for the temple of God is holy, which temple ye are. 18 Let no man deceive himself. If any man among you seemeth to be wise in this world, let him become a fool, that he may be wise. 19 For the wisdom of this world is foolishness with God. For it is written, He taketh the wise in their own craftiness. 20 And again, The Lord knoweth the thoughts of the wise, that they are vain. Sometimes God speak in parables but by reading this verse it’s obvious it’s a no. But we might ask what about the people in the Bible, Abraham, David ETC. Remember the women were betrothed to them as wives and concubines so it was official and legitimate. But if you can’t wait do it with thanksgiving with God in mind or get married. my own advice because in attempt of waiting some people entered into something more corrupt.
Lately, I have been thinking about premarital sex, chastity, and abstinence until marriage, and I’m beginning to believe that it’s pretty unrealistic. I’m an average Joe Catholic, and I’ve hardly met any average Joe Catholics who haven’t engaged in masturbation, fornication, or premarital sex (The movie Yes, God, Yes depicts this well). I think those who champion chastity and abstinence don’t take Original Sin and its influence very seriously. I was thinking that maybe there can be a compromise, like in the way we realize that Original Sin inevitably causes strife and war, so, over time, we’ve worked out the just war tradition as a compromise or a way of dealing with sin. To me, chastity and abstinence are like asking belligerents to lay down their guns and become pacifists, which some intuitively know to be unrealistic in our sinful world. Sometimes we must choose the lesser of two evils and negotiate with sin, as wicked as that sounds. Even Moses had to make adjustments and compromises with sin when dealing with the Israelite’s hard hearts, if I’m not mistaken (I’m thinking here about divorce). The vast majority of sex-hungry young adults, some of those Christian, have hard hearts. In the OT, God had to accommodate himself to human ways and permitted Israel to unify under a king as they wanted. I think when theory (chastity/abstinence) meets reality (sex-hungry young adults with sin coursing through their veins) ), it never works out as planned, so adjustments and compromises have to be made.
Mostly young teenage boy and girl are not ready for marriage due to this reason it is not good for them to have premarital sex. But does premarital sex or sex before marriage a SIN?\r \r Q. Does man is worthy and has authority to define if the act of sex before marriage a SIN?\r A. Absolutely not. Why? because God says in Ps.116:11 “I said in My haste, All men are liars.” And since all men are sinners and fall short to the glory of God, he is not worthy to define that sex before marriage is a SIN. \r Q. So, who has the sole authority to declare that “sex before marriage is a SIN or is not a SIN”? \r A. It is only God who has the sole authority for His judgment is righteous acc. to the Bible.\r Q. Where can we find in the Bible that sex before marriage is not a sin or a sin?\r A. We can only find the Word of God written in Deu.22:28-29\r \r This is the only passage and commanded by God in the Bible that deals with sex before marriage or we call it pre-marital sex.\r \r God says,\r Deu 22:28 If a man find a damsel that is a virgin, which is not betrothed, and lay hold on her, and lie with her, and they be found; \r Deu 22:29 Then the man that lay with her shall give unto the damsel’s father fifty shekels of silver, and she shall be his wife; because he hath humbled her, he may not put her away all his days. \r \r Bethrothed is an archaic words means ‘engaged to be married’ in our modern english.\r v.28 shows sex before marriage that people knew and find occurred. Did God impute sin to the man and the damsel?
Paul’s Gospel is referring to adultery and selling one’s self off, prostitution. Paul was writing to gentiles in Corinth, Rome, and Galatia and trying to help guide them on how to co-exist and behave in a community surrounded by practitioners of pagan religions, sexual rituals, and harlotry. Paul recommended sex to occur within marriage as way to control the burn (desire and passion) not that it was a sin to have sex before marriage. Adultery is unquestionably a sin; sex before marriage is not. If sexual compatibly does not exist between husband and wife then is one more likely to commit adultery?
So I’m very much in love with a girl who is very Christian. I am not however I’m more spiritual. I’ve only been with two other women previous. This girl is not in love with me back but she has feelings for me. Wants to work on her self and build her relationship with God. I love that. But we have given into temptation once and shes had one other partner. Our flesh takes control at times. But I’m learning more. I have seen a future with her. I plan to marry her one day. And I can tell she wants to be with me too but she prayed to God and he said be still and wait. Upon knowing this. I will be strong and not have sex again until after marriage.
How do you talk to unbelievers about Christ, when they are open about having sex with almost anyone? How can you use a conversation about sex to bring someone to Christ, or share about Christ. Thank you for anything I’ll learn!!! Recently I found myself in the mist of unbelievers talking about sex and different partners, and them saying that if their spouse cheated that they felt justified to cheat to. I did not have the right words to say at that moment, I would really appreciate some good advice for future references. Being so young in my generation, I really want to focus on Christ. And have godly wisdom to share with people who have such mindset
Very good teaching because you are giving scripture not your opinion but What God Says it will be wonderful if they could put you on CNN because the whole world needs this message you see there is no dating boyfriend or girlfriend in the Bible only a marriage between a man and a woman when it comes down to sexual relationships.
I see you learn a lot however I think the real question is can you have sex during commitment. If a man is engaged with a woman to be is wife then having sex in that context is marriage, 1 Corinthians 7:36 “If anyone is worried that he might not be acting honorably toward the virgin he is engaged to, and if his passions are too strong and he feels he ought to marry, he should do as he wants. He is not SINNING. They should get married.” Here we see that if the man that is engaged to a woman can’t wait he may do what he wants he is not sinning. Their is no sin in getting a license so sin in this way is being used as a action (in other words sex). This is why God doesn’t recognize the divorce cause marriage starts at sex not at the marriage license, that is why if a man “marry” (as in license) but doesn’t have sex with the woman at all then he may divorce and marry another cause the two didn’t become one. A marriage license is for the hardness of the heart if they need a certificate to keep them together then maybe they shouldn’t get married, now granted there’s legal issues that the state needs that is fine so by all means get that done. Also for anyone who thinks theirs a blessing with waiting the Holy Spirit inspires words to Paul clearly show that there isn’t, “But if you do marry, you have not sinned; and if a virgin marries, she has not sinned. But those who marry will face many troubles in this life, and I want to spare you this.”\r 1 Corinthians 7:28 I hope this idea start to change our thinking
I notice that all the scriptures you posted were from the New Testament only. The majority of the Bible is Old Testament. I agree with what you said, however, Jesus criticized the Pharisees of his today for “following the Traditions of men”. We have our own traditions of men in modern times. Imagine this scenario, after dating for some time, maybe a year or more, a couple finally gets engaged. Maybe, planning an expensive, elaborate wedding takes six months or more. Maybe they get engaged in October but don’t want to be married until June when the weather is nice so they (she!) can have a fairy tale wedding. Right …. Have you never read about Rebecca and Isaac? Abraham was living in a … permissive age when there were lots of ungodly people around. He would simply not accept his son marrying some local liberal woman. He went out and found a godly wife for him. Rebecca, returning from her original family saw Isaac far away. She asked Abraham’s servant who was bringing her to Isaac if that was him. When she received an affirmative answer, as the bible says …. “she went into his tent and became his wife.” Did she now? What did they do, hold hands and sing Kum By yah? No, she jumped his bones and screwed his brains out and the bible says that Isaac was comforted after the death of his mother. I also remember reading that in Jesus’ time, a child that was conceived after a betrothal (engagement) but before a wedding was considered to be a legitimate child. Only a century or two ago, people had formal “betrothal ceremonies” and a wedding took place after.
What is worse? Being in a long term committed relationship with Sex before marriage or getting a divorce? Why should you quickly rush to get married just so you can have sex but when it doesn’t work out and you get divorced? I know a guy who proposed to one of my friends Bc he wanted to have sex with her ?? That doesn’t seem right to me either. (She rejected his proposal btw) What if you and your future spouse have plans to get married and have been together for 5+ years? Both have been faithful and respectful? Getting married is expensive and a lottttt of legalities. While I believe in getting married, I know not everyone does
Through all this I just wanna give my honest opinion,I genuinely feel it is best to have sex before marriage as just as one sets themselves in a position to learn about their partner before they make the decision to propose or marry them,it is also best to know them sexually and physically,both emotional and physical factors play a major role when it comes to marriage and when one is out of place once you’re married will be a big problem. Say for example you really love a woman and she ticks all the right boxes in terms of how she makes you feel and the type person she is including the morals she stands by but you’ve never had sexual relations before and are waiting for marriage. Once you’re married and have sex for the first time and one of you if not both do not enjoy it because you’ve had no previous experience either with each other or someone else,then that would definitely heavily impact and damage your marriage because sex is not just a means of potentially making children,it’s a combination of everything. So honestly I say the best option is to have sex before marriage so you know what you do and don’t like and then you’ll be able to determine who you should choose or decide to marry based of sexual pleasure and emotional factors that I mentioned before. Sex is not only just something that carries a marriage,all avenues have to be in the right place and there can’t be an imbalance,you and your partner need to be on the right and same path spiritually, emotionally and physically and there isn’t one that’s more important than the other because they all compliment and support each other in some kind of way,if one is not on the same level spiritually and with God then i feel emotionally it would be rather difficult to find peace and balance in the relationship and if that’s not in place then it be difficult to pleasure each other and express their love for each other through the act of sex and statistically it’s seen in a lot of broken marriages.
When I was younger. And looking at the girlie magazine. And being attracted to very large women. I was told that sex was a sin. And only for the procreation of children. And not for pleasure. And I did have sex outside marriage. And I was told it was a sin. And when I got married. Again my mother told me again. Over and over again. That sex was a sin. And my first ex-wife. Was puzzled why I would not make love to her. And I was into the fantasy world. Phone sex. Because I was not happy at all. And I got divorced. Then the second ex-wife. Came around. And she is a christian. But I went to jail for a little while. And I tried to make love to her and I just did a couple of times. And then I stopped all together. Because I could hear the preaching. From my mother that sex was a sin.And not for pleasure. After the second divorce. In 2015 I refuse to date. Or get into a relationship or a marriage. Because when I was a kid and as a teen. I had a tendency to lean to isolation. Since childhood. I got laughed at for my preference in women. Also the laughter from peers. About my dating failures. And i didnt even have a date for the prom. And I am painfully sensitive in company. And incapable of flirting or courtship. certain
I think that the word purity is far too exaggerated. Don’t get me wrong, I’m Christian myself but with this I can say that none of us are pure, or probably will never at least shed a beam of pureness because at the end of the day, every obstacle God gives us is a test, and we aren’t perfect so chances are we will ever so rarely pass them, and or do the contrary, Only if we are willing to put in the effort of changing for ourselves and the Lord. Great article, however! Very informative.
The original ancient Greek word you have chosen to read as ‘Sexual Immorality’ is *Porneia. From the root ‘Porne’ = to sell, and the stem ‘eia’ = like/abstraction of. In the Greek Septuagint it is used mostly to describe the selling of oneself into the thralldom foreign religions and in common Greek parlance it was an insult to imply that one had sold themselves into the lowest class of slave, the Pornie, the sex-slaves. It has nothing to do with sexual immorality and is to do with subjecting yourself.
Just to be clear, do you believe that premarital sex between consenting adults should be criminalized, or do you simply disagree with it from a Christian perspective? Actually, the Greek word “porneia” means “prostitution”. The word “fornication” also originally meant “prostitution”, but in recent times has started to mean “premarital sex”, which is not the original intended meaning of “porneia” or “fornication”. I don’t think what “porneia” is talking about is the rampant temple prostitution that was common in Pagan Greco-Roman communities.
I may be leaving this world soon. But I urgently need some biblical and spiritual questions to be answered buy a protestant paster. Do you know by any chance of a e-mail where I could ask a pastor that won’t judge me. Important biblical questions? PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE. I’ve asked on many websites. No one has given me a email 😢I am in crisis. I need a very clever and loving pastor to answer a bunch of questions through e-mail .THANK YOU.
Where does the Bible, the New Testament, say that sex “before” marriage is a sin, that it’s an example of pornia, “sexual immorality”? I am a new Christian, and i truly want to know, instead of a athiest looking for an argument. We think of “fornication” as sex “before” marriage, but the KJV’s word “fornication” means sexual immorality. Other than the Samaritan woman at the well, and the man she “had” when she met Jesus, is sex “before” marriage ever mentioned in the New Testament?
Sexual intercourse is marriage!👉To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband.(1 Corinthians 7:10) (If a man’s wife isn’t a virgin or widow, he is married to another man’s wife!)👉”If a man seduces a virgin who is not pledged to be married and sleeps with her, he must pay the bride-price, and she shall be his wife.(Exodus 22:16)👉But Er, Judah’s firstborn, was wicked in the LORD’s sight; so the LORD put him to death.Then Judah said to Onan, “Sleep with your brother’s wife and fulfill your duty to her as a brother-in-law to raise up offspring for your brother.” But Onan knew that the child would not be his; so whenever he slept with his brother’s wife, he spilled his semen on the ground to keep from providing offspring for his brother.What he did was wicked in the LORD’s sight; so the LORD put him to death also.(Genesis 38:7-10)
As long as chastity before marriage is being viewed as a self-imposed chain there will always be people claiming to be Christians who cave in to their desire to experience sex out of wedlock and here in Italy (my country) most catholics merrily ignore what the Bible says about sex before marriage and only minority groups (like the Jehovah’s Witnesses for example) take it seriously. The Bible does stress the importance of holding back from improper fleshly desires but actually it speaks about chastity not in terms of it being some kind of self-imposed chain but as part of the things that God teaches us “to benefit ourselves” as Isaiah 48:17 points out. This means that far from being some sort of unreasonable restriction, self-control (not only in the domain of sex but also in every other domain of life such as money spending, the ability to restrain oneself from lashing out, the ability to hold back from talking a lot and listen to others instead etc) is thinking in terms of long-term benefits vs instant gratification. A Christian engaged couple that holds back from fornication develops a degree of self-control that will stand them in good stead in every area of their life as a couple: the self-control that they mastered while holding back from sex before marriage will spill over into every aspect of their marriage and they will likely be able to hold back from spending money they don’t have on things they don’t need and getting into unnecessary debt, from venting their emotions on each other and from countless other miopic moves.
i am not a christian nor a fan of god, but these are serious questions and observations, not trolling: it is mathematically and logistically impossible for everyone to marry, and not everyone wants to marry. so if you don’t marry are you supposed to die a virgin? why would god hardwire us all for sex, make it intensely pleasurable, mentally and physically beneficial, then restrict it only to married people knowing full well not everyone will marry? if god actually feels that way then the notion of god is all loving and only wants the best for everyone is wrong. i know not every couple is two people of the same age but for discussion sake it is ok for two 20 year olds who dated six weeks and married to have sex yet is sinful for two 30, 40, 50, 60+ year olds who are not married to have sex? this makes no sense! sins cause harm. there is harm in murder, stealing, etc… there is no harm, in fact there is benefit, in consensual sex. when a married person strays, which is also sex outside marriage, there is harm. i think one of the reasons so many marriages are bad and / or end in divorce is people get married because they think it is an accomplishment or crazier yet an obligation. i have nothing against marriage or married people but get over yourselves! you got married, you did not split the atom. married people have not earned more nor are they entitled to more than single people. consensual sex is part of the human experience, not the only for married experience
Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind, Nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God. And such were some of you: but ye are washed, but ye are sanctified, but ye are justified in the name of the Lord Jesus, and by the Spirit of our God. 1 Corinthians 6:9-11
It’s so one sided it hurts my soul. You can marry someone and then it may not work out, you may be cheated also by your wife, not only gf. It’s not a magic pill, sex may be an amazing experience and if you want to torture yourself, spend couple of thousands for the weeding and then get severely disappointed, be my guest, but at least admit that this idea may work, but it doesn’t have to.
I’m absolutely crushed I can’t love my girlfriend through out college. So I have to wait four years and 30,000 for a marriage in order to make love to her. I love my God the Christ but it’s so unfair. I find myself upset with God that if I want to have sex with my girlfriend I gotta cough up money and wait years in order to have her. It’s so unfair or at least in my eyes that if I love her before the cash drop and friend like behavior for like 4 years I’m going to hell
Good article, but You failed to mention the utmost important thing as stated in 1 Corinthians 6:9-10 Or do you not know that wrongdoers will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor men who have sex with men nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanders nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God.
God please you, all respect for Christian people I read the ten commandments it’s so beautiful, I still virgin and I’m 24 I like marriage and I like I don’t have sexual past so that with my feature parent, you be more likely to cheat if you have more sexual partners in the past so one woman one man family its life …
I was in love with god and when I was 22 I tried sex and omg! wow! I don’t Regret doing it! Now I don’t think sex is bad what so ever! The only bad thing is, it distance me from god but my life is amazing and I dont really need to go to church anymore I still am blessed and I love god! Ive actual improved my life by having sex, it makes me smart! I can do what ever I want now! But thats just my opinion! She is right! Also sex makes me want to stay away from dirty websites! God bless! Preach it girl!😀
People always say it’s my choice,its none of your business like bruh, but isn’t its a sin to sex before marriage? Ofc it’s a sin and most of ppl now don’t have religious and just have sex for fun:( then what the point of religion exist in the first place then? It is not to teach us to be human, etc? Ofc it is nvm I’m to lazy to talk I’ll attract hater;)
So….I don’t blame you for trying but you did exactly what everyone else does when trying to prove sex before marriage is a sin. You made ASSUMPTIONS. It’s really all you can do because the Bible doesn’t say it. You’d this that if this was SOOOO important to God it would have been written very clearly and throughout scripture.
Here’s the thing about men. They are looking for a perfect woman like you. You have the beauty and intelligence and that’s difficult to find that’s why you probably get a lot of attention and it’s difficult for a man not to try to pursue someone like you which makes it possibly difficult for you too.
I can understand why God would want this…waiting until after marriage for sex would make the sex more meaningful and special…which is how it’s meant to be….no wonder people that have meaningless sex and one night stands are depressed.. In the long run it’s better for your mental health too to wait.
Didn’t quite get it.. so did you or did you not have premarital sex ? And for the record, heavy kissing and sitting on laps ARE inherently wrong. And allow me to say this, Your dressing is attractive and so are you. Reducing elements of arousal would be best by dressing modestly. That’s why in Islam women are ordered to be covered. It’s better for society. All the love to you, and thank you for the article !
As a believer to Jesus I absolutely disagree. We are not in Medieval age anymore. In the past there weren’t condoms or any other contraception so this rule was meant as protection for women so that they are not left alone with child in poverty. In the past people also got married much earlier in there twenties so it was doable… In these days average man gets married in his thirties. It’s impossible and harmful to your body to wait. This rule of waiting with sex until your marriage is outdated and unnatural. I will never do that. God doesn’t want that either…
why would you have sex b4 marriage, its disgusting that your future husband finds out that you are not a virgin,, unless you marry the first guy you have sex with than you are guilty of removing the first right of your future husband,,, why would your future husband find out that your gates have already been opened by someone else and that he is just another visitor in this yard and has to make a choice whether to go inside the house or remain having more fun in the front yard.
You hang everything on “The Bible” which is a collection of SOME ancient texts specifically chosen to support a particular theological or political view. The guys that did that left out a lot of stuff they didn’t like. In turn those ancient texts are really just myths and legends that some zealots wanted to claim came from God to them. And only to them. And they were supposed to make everyone else follow what God supposedly told them. Funny how that stuff works out. The Bible also says women must marry their rapists if the guy pays her father, and that children should be stoned to death for sassing their parents. How’re you doing on those parts? Judeo-Christian teachings about sex have only one goal, and that is to control and dominate women, and remove their self-determination and personal liberty. If you had any understanding at all about what the Bible is and how it got here, you’d reject it for the total bullshit it is. Live free, girl. Lose the ancient women-as-property bullshit.