Losing your virginity before marriage can be a significant life event, but it does not have to define you or your future. It is important to understand what to expect and what might happen, as it comes in various forms and formats for each person. The physical sensation of losing your virginity can be subtle, and people’s emotions and reactions can vary widely.
The consequences for losing your virginity before marriage widely depend on which Christian denomination you are in. In Protestant and evangelical Christianity, premarital sex is strongly discouraged and, at times, severely condemned. However, there are real emotional, physical, and spiritual reasons why it is best to wait until you are in a committed, married relationship with a man who will.
Sex before marriage is not fornication, and it is best to share all your firsts with your wife, not your girlfriend. If you have any strong feelings about sex before marriage, it is okay. The Bible carefully talks about being pure before marriage.
For many women today, sex is as natural as ever, and it is not a status to either want or treasure. Virginity is not a status to either want or treasure, nor is it a qualification to look for in a desirable partner. It is important to remember that God is more than willing to forgive and cleanse sins if we confess our sins.
📹 To Anyone Who’s STILL A VIRGIN..
Watch this if you’re still a virgin. I hope this helps. Build Your Body, Quit P*rn & Get Girls …
Is it important to be a virgin before marriage?
But when it comes to marriage, especially arranged marriages, a woman with a sexually active history is still seen as a problem. Why is virginity so important? How does this affect women? Dr. Mahindra Vatsa, a gynecologist and sex counselor, says it’s because our traditional values are still strong. “One of the most common questions I get is ‘How do I know my bride or girlfriend is a virgin?’ “There’s no way to know,” says Dr. Watsa. He says it’s just men and their families being unrealistic. How does our culture not stop couples from having sex before marriage? “Once a couple is engaged, they think they can do anything,” he says. “It’s not a big deal.” Some men still complain to me that their wives did not bleed on the first night, so they think she is not a virgin. The hymen doesn’t always break when a woman has sex. Some women are born without it, some are so elastic that it never ruptures, and some are so fragile that a little activity may have ruptured it without them even realizing it. “It’s not possible to tell if a girl is a virgin just by looking at her,” says Dr. Rajan Bhonsle. “It’s also not possible to tell if a girl is a virgin just by asking her.” He adds that in a relationship, it’s more important for a couple to focus on virtues like trust and honesty. “If a woman admits to having had sex, it shouldn’t matter. “She’s honest for admitting it, even though she could have hidden it,” he says. Some men, especially those raised in traditional families, are influenced by their family members. “In these families, being bold is equated with falling in love or having sex before marriage. They think that if a girl has sex before marriage, she will keep doing it after. Actress Sophie Choudry says that most people in Mumbai and other cities don’t expect their partners to be virgins anymore because India has changed a lot in the past 10 years. India is no longer closed. Young Indian women work and make their own choices. The Indian man has had to adapt to this change. Girls from smaller cities and more conservative families face pressure to stay virgins until marriage. But an intact hymen doesn’t guarantee virginity. A woman’s hymen can be ruptured by non-sexual activities like sports, dancing, riding a motorcycle, etc. It’s not necessary for a virgin to bleed the first time she has sex. In fact, only 42% of women bleed on their first time. With modern technology, a plastic surgeon can easily reconstruct the hymen. Remember, virginity and chastity aren’t the only things that make a marriage happy. Honesty and trust are more important. Follow us on Twitter and Facebook for more stories.
What if a girl is not virgin before marriage?
People feel most comfortable in their bedroom. Women lie about their vital stats, and men also fudge about their sex partners. Maybe it helps them keep the romance alive. Here are some truths people prefer to keep secret. Couples fake orgasms to avoid upsetting their partner. This is common among women. Revati Prasad, who works with a Noida-based MNC, says, “Like other girls, I talked about sex with my friends before getting married.” But when it came to doing it, I was scared. It’s been eight months, and I rarely orgasm. I find sex painful. I keep quiet because I’m afraid of being rejected. “I think it would hurt my husband’s ego if I told him he doesn’t satisfy me.” Dr. Sanjay Chugh, a psychiatrist, says, “Sometimes men fake an orgasm, but it’s mainly a female problem.” There are many reasons, like guilt, fear of pregnancy, lack of desire, or painful intercourse. You don’t always reach orgasm. Faking it to spare your partner from embarrassment is wrong in bed. “I forgot the count. Men think women are possessive.” Men often exaggerate the number of women they’ve slept with. Rakesh Aggarwal, a marketing executive, says, “No woman wants to be in a competition, so I don’t try to impress my girlfriends.” I’ve been with nine women in four years, but I think I’m serious this time. She’s my office colleague. She knows I’m not a virgin, but I don’t want to tell her I’ve slept with half a dozen women.Dr. Kamal Khurana, a relationship expert, says that men also don’t like women who have had many sex partners. People lie about their exes because they don’t want to be honest. It’s your choice, but keeping your partner in the dark is unfair. “It was fun! Your partner pushed you to try a new position.” It was awkward and not pleasurable. You said it was great. Many people can relate to this situation. Reema Sinha, a content writer, says, “My boyfriend and I were on a weekend break.” I was looking forward to some good sex. I was enjoying it until I got into a funny position. I think he liked our new sex position, but I laughed, and he was upset. “I decided to let him experiment,” Dr. Sanjay Chugh said. “It’s good to try new ways to have a good time with your partner in bed.” Nobody likes a boring sex routine. Be considerate of your partner’s comfort. It’s hard for women to reach orgasm in certain positions. Who goes to bed with a measuring tape? It’s easy to brag about your body. Chitra Rawat, a media person, says, “Men love women with big breasts. My boyfriend is no exception.” Lingerie makes it easier to look a size bigger. I think it’s fair to mislead him if it gives him a sexual high. “The only problem is, I can’t go lingerie shopping with him.” “Most men like women with fuller figures.” If you know how to use it, it’s the best. Sometimes men brag about their size. Don’t make claims you can’t keep. “It could embarrass you both,” says Dr. Khurana. Virginity is still a big deal when it comes to marriage. People still want a virgin when they get married, even if they say they don’t. Suparna Gupta, an architect, says, “I was in an intense relationship in the past. We couldn’t take it further because of his family issues.” I’m getting married to another guy. He might find out I’m not a virgin. I’m being careful because I don’t want to ruin my future. “Is it really a big deal?” “It’s not uncommon.” We live in a modern society, and premarital sex is common. But it’s still a secret. If you think your partner won’t accept your past, keep it to yourself. “If you have had sex, get a medical checkup before you get married,” Dr. Chugh says. BY RITU VERMA.
Does losing your virginity change you?
People sometimes think losing their virginity will change their lives. People think losing their virginity will change their lives. Everyone’s experience is different. Some feel happy, relieved, or anxious, while others feel nothing. Everyone reacts differently to having sex for the first time. How someone feels depends on their expectations and personality. Some people think sex changes their relationship. The change can be different for everyone. Some people feel overwhelmed during or after sex. One sexual experience doesn’t have to shape your identity or life.
What sin is unforgivable?
In Christian theology, eternal sin is the sin that can’t be forgiven. The Bible says that one sin is unforgivable. This is called the sin unto death. It is blasphemy against the Holy Spirit. This sin is mentioned in several Bible passages. These include Mark 3:28–29, Matthew 12:31–32, Luke 12:10, Hebrews 6:4–6, Hebrews 10:26–31, and 1 John 5:16.Christian theologians disagree about what the unforgivable sin is. They agree that if you’ve committed it, you can’t repent.
New Testament passages The New Testament often refers to the unforgivable sin.
Will God forgive me for losing my virginity before marriage?
Your question about forgiveness shows you care about following God’s design for sex. This is good. God wants us to follow his will. God wants our hearts to be on him. Those who follow him are forgiven for all they do that goes against his will. This includes premarital sex. Paul said, “I do the wrong things I don’t want to do.” “I do the evil I don’t want to do,” (Rom. 7:19). You may feel the same way about past choices. But Paul later says, “Thank God for saving me through Jesus!” (Rom. 7:25). Thank God for helping us follow his will. He gives us strength, his presence, and the presence of other Christians to encourage us and keep us accountable to live godly lives. So, now that you know God will forgive you, what do you do? Should we keep doing things against God’s will to see more of his grace? Of course not! Think about this instead:
Do girls regret losing their virginity?
It’s normal to feel mixed after losing your virginity. If you regret losing your virginity, know that it’s common and doesn’t have to define you. Sex for the first time is often not as good as you think it will be, but it gets better with time. Read on to learn why people regret losing their virginity and how to move on.
Disclaimer: We’ll use the term “losing your virginity” throughout this article. But it’s important to know that the idea of virginity and losing it doesn’t align with our values. Don’t let your feelings after losing your virginity ruin your self-worth. Losing your virginity is a big deal and often a big disappointment. Don’t let a bad first experience ruin your self-worth or stop you from having sex. You’re not the first to feel this way. You won’t be the last. It gets better. I’m being honest.
Do most people regret losing their virginity?
It’s normal to feel mixed after losing your virginity. If you regret losing your virginity, know that it’s common and doesn’t have to define you. Sex for the first time is often not as good as you think it will be, but it gets better with time. Read on to learn why people regret losing their virginity and how to move on.
Disclaimer: We’ll use the term “losing your virginity” throughout this article. But it’s important to know that the idea of virginity and losing it doesn’t align with our values. Don’t let your feelings after losing your virginity ruin your self-worth. Losing your virginity is a big deal and often a big disappointment. Don’t let a bad first experience ruin your self-worth or stop you from having sex. You’re not the first to feel this way. You won’t be the last. It gets better. I’m being honest.
Can you tell if a girl isn’t a virgin anymore?
To know if someone has had sex, ask. There’s no way to know if someone has had sex without asking. No, not even tests for virginity. Learn more about the unethical, imprecise, and traumatic practice of virginity testing. This includes what it is and what to do if someone tries to test you. Virginity testing is the practice of determining whether a person with a vagina has had penetrative vaginal sex. It’s usually done with a pelvic exam.
What happens if a girl lost her virginity before marriage?
You can’t tell if someone is a virgin. However, there are many ways to seem not to be a virgin. Never admit to having had sex. Keep it. In India, a woman is considered a virgin until her hymen is broken, which causes bleeding. Tell your husband you were active in sports and damaged your hymen. On the first night, act like you’re having sex for the first time. Act like you’re having sex for the first time. YouTube has lots of videos to help you prepare. Don’t worry. If you don’t have sex anymore, your vagina will go back to normal. Get a hymenoplasty to fix your hymen. This is the best way to restore your vagina.
Doctors on Lybrate offer suggestions for information only. The content on Lybrate is not meant to replace your doctor’s advice.
📹 SEX BEFORE MARRIAGE | NON VIRGIN-TRUTH
For more follow up questions answered read my blog post! My biggest prayer is that this helps someone. I honestly hate being this …
Great article Sir! I would like to mention a book that you haven’t mentioned and its for Insecure Americans. it’s called CrushAnyGirl and so on its for finding a girlfriend as Insecure American. After reading, you will have a better perspective on girl’s and find your gf in thirty days, guaranteed Highly recommended to read
I’m 28 years old and still a virgin. Honestly, now a days I respect both men and women who choose to wait until they are married or at least in a committed relationship. The stigma around being a virgin seems to be going away more and more and we as people should value the importance of what it means to have sex or make love and when to do it.
21 years old, virgin, 6 foot 2,I work out and I get quite a handfull of complements for my looks. I don’t get nervous when I speak to women and I flirt enough with them when I wish to. But I am a Christian and believe in sex after marriage ( I grew up with the right standards before me), and self development as they come before all those things. I believe in building by self to be the right father and husband to my kids and wife. Most of my free time I spend the working on all round self development and trying to treat people right, it keeps me of thinking of trends that we youths follow. Stay strong, build your future, this is our building era. The time for doing will eventually come and we will have it to the fullest.
I’m a 21 yo virgin and it’s been rough. I remember i got my first decent job when I was 19. My coworkers were a group of people, half of them around my age. I remember they quickly started talking about sex and it came up that I was a virgin and they kept bringing it up. Despite being older than half of them, I immediately felt like a child. 90% of the conversations they had were about sex and I didn’t have anything to do besides sit there with them. They weren’t bad people, I just wasn’t confident about myself or my decisions. I haven’t dated anyone since I was 16. I know it’s because I haven’t approached anyone and my social skills are not the best. I’m working on it now by learning to love myself and build up my confidence. Thank you for this article
As a 23 year old female in college and am a virgin, I needed this article. I’ve been around some guy that has been saying I’m “no fun” for not wanting to have sex with him. I’ve been thinking I’m weird for wanting to save it for marriage given how our culture is nowadays, hell even a family member has pressured me to do it. It’s not a good feeling when you see everyone else do it and you’re considered the weirdo for not. I’ve questioned if there are even any guys that have similar thoughts..but this article helped me gain clarity to work on myself and stay to what makes me happy. Thank you. ❤
I’m 23 years old and still a virgin. Being a male virgin doesn’t really bother me. In fact, I take pride in my virginity. I’m waiting to lose it to the right girl. The pros definitely outweigh the cons of being a virgin. No risks of getting a girl pregnant and no STDs. I refuse to succumb to hookup culture and I’m not going to get a vasectomy just to avoid risking pregnancies. I also think loving someone is much more romantic than sex will ever be.
As a young woman who is losing hope every day for a self-respecting young man to come into my life, I sincerely appreciate this article. I see how both men and women treat themselves on the internet and it always leaves a sour taste in my mouth. The culture of today even used to have a hold on me at one point, and it messed up the way that I was supposed to view the opposite sex. I’m a Christian, and I pray everyday that God will help me overcome the challenges of today so I can find a man who is Godly, self-respecting, compassionate, kind, diligent, and full of integrity. It is a difficult time to grow up nowadays, especially with the access people have to pornography and such. Thank you for your impactful contrabution to bettering this world ❤
I feel like everyone should hear this once they hit puberty. I am 20, I am a virgin and I never felt ashamed of it. I was almost raped a few times and that shifted my mindset into “Okay, this is not something I wanna do with someone random. I must trust the person and I’m not opening up to somebody in this way unless I love them.” Today’s society disgusts me when it comes to the approach to sex tbh 😀
This article hit me like a freight train, if I’m going to be honest. I’m a 19 year old male, and obviously, I’m a virgin. And actually, this was recommended to me when I first opened youtube… immediately after I closed the hub for the second time in less than 8 hours. And before I was on the hub, I was trying to find legitimate hook up sights for free. I feel like I needed to see this. I feel like I need help or someone to talk to. I can relate to a lot of your story. I know the girl. Her and I have known each other for almost 5 years. We met in our freshman year. I’m sure most guys know that feeling when you see a pretty girl at a store or something and you daydream a life with her. We all get that. I got that when I saw this girl, but the extremity of it was more than I’ve ever felt before. I, like you, am very shy. I never went out to talk to girls, even if I had a huge crush on them. But this was different. I took a week getting the courage to even speak to her. I eventually did, kept it casual. We spent that first week just talking, getting to know each other. Exactly a week after we first started talking, my dreams came true. She confessed that she was growing feelings for me. I knew she would say yes, so I asked her to be my girlfriend. She did. I didn’t know how I managed, but I had the sweetest, cutest, funniest girl ever and she was my girlfriend. Little did I know what I signed up for, however. Due to personal and unrelated issues, we had a long off and on relationship, but I grew too attached to her and didn’t want to give up on our relationship.
Man, I’m still here at 19, I haven’t because I know it’s special. I am a Christian, proud to be, and until I find the one I want to spend the rest of my life with me being a virgin won’t change anytime soon. If anyone is pressuring you into this sort of thing, especially a partner you need to stay away from them, if that is what they want from the relationship then it’s not built on anything substantial.
i admire and respect you for feeling the need and having the courage to share this article with everyone. i’m sure you’ve helped so many people feel better about their feelings and maybe even helped people be more confident and sure of their decision to stay a virgin until they’re truly ready. thank you 🙂
I’m a 24 year old guy and I’m still a virgin. But I’m a virgin in many ways. I’ve never been on a date, I’ve never kissed a girl, I haven’t done anything with another person. AND I’m not quiet, I’m what people consider popular. I know everyone, talk to everyone, and I’m friends with a good chunk of them. I put too much pressure on myself to find the perfect person, or to wait until that right person comes along, I don’t give any person the chance. I feel like you’re right, but I’ve internally taken it to an extreme which is honeslty just as bad.
“yeah…sick in the head” haha, love that part. Wow, I actually find so helpful that you share your experience with us. I think it’s something that is not so much talk about, ’cause as you said, it’s normalize to talk about ‘what’s your body count’ more than ‘I’m waiting’. So thanks for that, and also, your narration was very entertaining, you’re good at it.
As a girl of 20 y/o who has never had a serious crush, first kiss, first date, I’ve never felt pressured, I’m learning so much from other people’s experiences and I hope I will treasure my value for my future someone and family. I am not stupid, I won’t do it with a random person, I really want to feel it. Also because s3x these days is viewed as something vulgar somehow and it’s disgusting how they portray it with such superficiality…while it’s something so freaking natural that since the beginning of times it’s thanks to that that we exist, why has it become so artificial?
I’m 31 and a virgin. Saving myself for a God-fearing wife. It’s a blessing to remain sexually pure and wait on the Lord. Edit: GOD BLESS YOU ALL for showing me love. I never expected my comment to blow up like this! 🙏🏾 To all the haters who took time to share their opinion of me, don’t judge what you can’t comprehend. This is my life and I choose to obey God by remaining pure until He blesses me with marriage.
Growing up, my friends lost their virginity during freshmen year of high school. I always thought that being a virgin was always a bad thing. Some of my friends would mock me about it and I would often feel insecure. The truth is I just wanna wait it out to find the right person. It’s messed up how most people care about “body counts” or how many hookups they did. Whatever happened to love? Or being respectful. This generation is so messed up, it’s disgusting. The world is completely different now. Whoever’s reading this, you’re not alone. I promise.
31 and virgin, and, at this point, actually proud. So much mindless f-ing around happening, hooking up quick, going seperate ways quick… I want it to be with someone special with whom I can share this experience long-term and not have it be, with a high likelyhood, be a stranger soon that I probably will think bad things about because it turns out he’s an asshole after closer inspection. Let alone the fact that your partner is probably going to be more gentle the first time than some stranger. But I don’t mean the first time per se, but the whole deed in general to be with someone special. It just so happens that the first time is also still missing. And I must admit, it scared some potential candidates off because they also think that there must be something wrong with me, as I thought for a long time, too, because of society. So they believed this stereotype, which is indeed a bit of a problem. Since there is actually absolutely nothing wrong with me. But yeah, the RIGHT one won’t care and he will be all the better for it. Maybe he will even appreciate it and will be happy about it since he is also kinda turned-off by how society is nowadays. Which is nothing I am expecting but it would be a relief to not only be met with a neutral but even a positive vibe, and it would encourage me even more that all that stressing out all of these years was uneccessary and that all is fine… Because even if I don’t care anymore on my part, one still worries a bit about how the other party will receive it and think about it.
I’m a 28-year-old guy and I’m still a virgin. Not ashamed by it. Not bothered by it. I’m on my own path in life and I won’t be pressured into doing something just to please others. It’s perfectly OK to not be ready to have sex for whatever reason that may be. Just be yourself and focus on YOU! That’s all that matters.
I’m 21 and I’m proud to be a virgin in my generation. I stand my ground and stand firm. A relationship isn’t a priority, I have other priorities that are higher up that I need to focus on and that deed is best saved until after marriage, that’s what it’s made for. For those of you who are virgins, stay pure and get married.
I’m a 26 year old girl virgin and I am so insecure about it because society now and “hook up” culture makes it worse and feel so pressured to do it. It sucks because I feel like I haven’t found “the one” and I feel like I never will…. But thanks for the article, makes me feel better about being a virgin.
I’m a Christian girl and so I’m waiting until marriage before having sex. As a 17 year old it’s hard to find guys who respect that. But at the same time it tells me everything I need to know about them ahead of time. Sex is something that should be special and shared with someone you truly love, not just given away to a guy who doesn’t deserve such a connection. I’ll wait for my husband 🙂
I see so many guys here that I thought I could comment, as a 22-year-old female virgin: I’m really happy that so many of you have the same opinion as me. Coming from a friend group that has as many non-virgins as virgins, I sometimes feel pressure to meet certain expectations when it comes to “relationship talks,” and as someone who’s never dated before, I feel lonely. Don’t let society ruin your sanity and self-esteem. I protect my body and the vulnerability that comes with it, waiting for the person I want to trust the most. Don’t think about the rush. It’s okay to not rush and to wait. It’s okay to have high standards. And it’s okay to wait for the right person or not be interested in a relationship at all. Just be who you are, and when you’re ready, you are ready. We shouldn’t mock each other for having a lack of experience. It’s truly a shame that the experience of sex overshadows the experience of life, education, and wisdom. Give yourself the time to understand yourself. Enjoy what you’re doing in life right now. Evolve and get better. Do whatever makes you happy. I wish you all the best of luck and success. A big hug to all of you!!!
Porn is one of the worst things that has been offered to society. The fact that it is free and accesible to ANYONE of any age that has access to the internet is mind boggling. The easiest way to distort your sense of reality around sex, and for some men like myself, you find that to be your source of pleasure rather than the real thing until you realize what a waste it is. Stay up kings😤
I wish this mindset was widely accepted in society. Thank you Matt for making this article. As a girl who has been frustrated with the way guys have treated me (only wanting one thing from me) this article showed me hope that there are good guys out there who exist and will treat me with respect and dignity. Keep posting these articles and spreading your truth!
I’m a virgin at 29 and I’m a recovering addict I’m a year and 6 months sober. I was a alcoholic and a drug addict. I’ve almost died many times. I’m in the best shape of my life muscular, tall, and I even look younger. I used to be a crackhead literally. It is a horrible thing I’ve done long amounts of time in jail. I have more money than ever, I get alot of female attention, my looks, my story is a thing that definitely catches women’s attention. I will say that the last time I was happy was I had a girlfriend she was really cool, we didn’t have sex, but it was a pure romantic thing, her mom died and she disappeared. She quit her job, just dropped off the earth. It’s horrifying I get sick, all people talk about is sex, I have been beat like a dog, in a prison cell, going through withdrawals, everyone just talks about it all day, I work all the time, I have a good job I have several women I talk too all the time. It’s just hard, I’m a big guy, I’m muscular I’ve had to survive in a dog eat dog environment where men are being raped, I survived. Sometimes I want to physically beat men who talk about it too much. Keep it to yourself. I turn on the TV it’s like “your a loser if your not getting laid.” I’m 29 I’ve had a very hard life I’m a virgin and I’m kinda mad. My story is a little different I understand that but nobody understands. I gave my life to Jesus while stuck in a prison cell, I was saved by a preacher in jail. I can tell you drugs and alcohol are responsible for my failures with women, the last one was just bad timing.
As a women, I really needed to hear this. I have always felt really left out of ‘girl-talk’ and people used to laugh at me for not understanding dirty jokes or suggestive remarks. It’s even worse when a guy I’m talking too asks about it and then proceeds to tell me I’m acting all high and mighty like I’m something special. I completely understand what you mean about the pressure, but for me instead of giving in, I distanced myself from even my closest friends. I felt that I had to because it got to a point where I admittedly lied about losing my virginity just so we could talk about something else. It never sat right with me that I lied, but as a coward, I didn’t want to admit this to them. I thought that I could leave my worries behind in high school, but the question followed me into college where I faced the same dilemma. Now when asked, I either get really defensive or say something dumb like ‘wouldn’t you like to know,’ but it really just makes me sad. Talking about this always makes me uncomfortable but I like how you address the topic so nonchalantly. It also feels good getting this off my chest, even if it is to random people on the internet. A small part of me still hopes no one reads this though :”)
PLEASE READ THIS! I was the only friend in the friendgroup who was still a virgin and I put so much pressure on myself that I cried many times. I felt like a loser and I really didn’t want to be a virgin anymore. Which ultimately led to me losing my virginity down a sex street with my friends who forced me to do it. Right after I had sex with this women I directly regreted it. And now I’m even more ashamed off it than I was before I was a virgin. I wish I could go back and change that…
34 year old virgin. Didn’t get my first date until last year, and we almost started a relationship, but I wasn’t ready to be a father, so she stopped talking to me. It hurt, but I looked at the progress I made. I went from an incel to having my crush ask me out on a date. I still haven’t gone on a date since then, but that’s not a priority anymore.
I’m an 18 year old who never had a girlfriend or sex or even my first kiss it used to bother me when i see my friends making out with all these girls having sex relationships and all these girls who are into them but I’m at the point now where i don’t feel bothered or upset about it i have big dreams and big goals I’m striking for financial success and it doesn’t really matter anymore I’m not sad but it’s not something on my bucket list anymore
I’m 32, never been in a relationship and still a virgin. I used to be insecure about it, but now, I figured out my values and prefer to only have sex with the woman I marry as I want children as the result of the intercourse. I’m most definitely not in a hurry to have sex despite feeling anxious at the thought it will be weird because I’ve never been touched intimately by a woman.
Damn. I really needed to hear this. Thought this was gonna be another “self help” article but it really gave me some insight and a confidence boost. Keep doing what you do man. Need more people being honest about things like this. I’m a virgin and that’s ok. My time will come one day but their is so much more important things to focus on in life, especially when you’re young.
This guy is so right. When I and others were 17, everybody already lost their virginity but me. My ex-friends used to mock me all the time for being a virgin and I was really insecure at that time because I had so low confidence about my acne and how overweight I was. 2 years later, I took care of my skin and lost a lot of fat and gained a lot of muscle. I started to attract girls and I went on a rampage and got about 20 bodycounts in less than 3 months because of the overpowering insecurity I had over the last years. Now that I’m 22 and I look back at it, it really wasn’t worth it and not proud. Keep your heads up kings and find a girl that you genuinely love don’t rush it.
Im glad to feel welcomed by everybody in the comments section and with this article. Im 21 and a virgin and never been in a relationship but it’s because Im bad at communicating my feelings in person and another big part is that most dudes glorify hooking up with different wine always. But I definitely feel alone and it sucks especially when nobody in my family can make me feel welcomed. I dont feel welcome anywhere anymore. Been depressed for the past few days bc of feeling lonely plus I always smoke my weed to not think about anything so now that Im out Im overthinking about these things. I guess I long for true love maybe Thank you everybody for helping me calm down.
I myself am a 19 year old virgin. I turned down so many girls that just wanted one thing from me. This whole generation is fucked, I just want to communicate with someone, not for communication to meet, but an actual relationship. I’m waiting for the right one, hell I truly don’t care if I’m a virgin my whole life.
man hearing this made me feel some type of way. im 27, a virgin and never had a gf. its only just hit me this year that its a problem. im learning to eat better and start being more active while also cutting out bad habits like the hub. this man is right that girls are the true motivator. like sure, i want to be healthier and work out so i am healthy but come on we all know we do it for the girls. its been about 4 months since i changed my diet and ive lost close to 40 lbs just from diet alone and Im trying to get more active by doing some workouts from home. its going to be quite while of working on myself but i will get there one day and hopefully the girl for me is still out there.
Thanks Man!!! I’m empowered. I’m a 23 years old virgin in many things and I’m proud of it. I’m all about self improvement. There’s a different between sex and F*@king. See Sex is metaphyiscal than it is carnal/physical is any sense. It’s a communion/agreement, a celebration which binds two lovers together. Intercourse is just a conduit for sex– a website through which the souls become one
I am 24 y.o. virgin and as the times go on you kind of let it go and accept the reality. When I was 20 I was way more insecure about it, I couldn’t stop scrolling on dating apps, talking to multiple girls in attempt to get a first date (I’ve spend on tinder and other dating apps more than 3 years prior to 20 actively searching). It was a real mess, where out of frustrationI would beat my head against walls and hit myself with dull objects. Now it stings from time to time, but generally I am okay that I wasn’t made for relationships and sex. My final message – time indeed is a great healer.
Lost my virginity when I was about to turn 20 and I waited for the right guy which was the right thing to do.I had many other “options” but my body was always trembling and nervous when I was around them.When I found the right guy, my body was super relaxed and it just felt right.So never ever pressure yourself to do anything you don’t FEEL comfortable with and just relax, the right person will come to the right time❤
Thank you, I started my nofap journey a few weeks ago and I’m still a virgin. I don’t even feel the need to “do it” anymore. In the meantime I have been working out, reading and slowly improving my life. When the time comes I do lose my V card I know that I will be the proud man that I always wanted to be.
I’m so glad to have come across this article. I have been trying to teach my daughters to be abstinent until they are married. So much more goes into s&x than people understand. There are also soul ties that are sometimes hard to shake. Love how you covered “delayed gratification.” Everything today teaches to get things fast and now without speaking of the consequences. You have a lot of wisdom.
nearing the age of 23 and i’ve never really had any problems socializing nor any insecurities of still being a virgin. I’m curious about it but I am scared of giving it away to the wrong person. Nearly every friend I have, men and women, are no longer virgins and here I am still keeping myself reserved cuz i do not want to end up regretting it nor have any bad memories. I want it to be special and only be with one person, hoping to grow old with one person and one person only.
You are absolutely correct, especially that last part. A few years ago, I decided to start working on myself, maintaining how I look, my physique, and learning more stuff to educate myself… Since then, I find it way easier to connect to any female. It’s like I’ve unlocked a new milestone by leveling up lol.
It’s hard for me because of childhood bullying, which gave me social anxiety, depression, and difficulty trusting others. I’m not into getting one night stands, but I struggle even to get a girlfriend. I want romance, obviously, with a woman that I find sexually attractive. But idk how to get myself out of my trap. It’s not about pressure for me. It’s loneliness, sexual frustration, etc. I’ve been single for too long and I just want to gain the confidence to attract the women that I’m attracted to.
I lost my virginity about 6 months ago, when I was 21. Even though I’m not a virgin anymore this article made me deeply rethink the decision I made that night. Just like you Matt I ended up in a relationship with this woman, and I thought to myself at that time that just because I was having sex with this girl that somehow I was winning, or succeeding in life, until about a week ago when she basically ditched me for her ex. Which destroyed me. And now that she’s gone I can’t help but feel like I was robbed these last six months, of what should’ve been a very intimate and unique relationship, and now I just remember losing my virginity as some “chore” I had to get done. This article sends a great message to anyone who’s reading this and is still a virgin. Trust me, it’s so much more worth it to bide your time and wait until you meet someone who is truly in love with you, you’ll forgive yourself in the end, and that is nothing to be ashamed about.
wow this actually made me open my eyes, i’ve had trouble getting away from fapping, tried many times but failed in the end, thought alot about stopping once and for all and i think your article was the sign for me to pursue this goal, btw i’m still a virgin at 22 but rn all i care about is getting better in the gym, which i primarily do for myself to feel more comfortable but of course i want to look more attractive and be more confident in my own body. Thanks bro, u really helped me here and i’m going to try my best to get to my goal, i’ll update in 2 months if i made it, and to everyone else who is struggling with it, try to pick up some new hobbys, distract urself, staying alone often brings that thought back of doing it whenever you feel comfortable, ur the one to decide what to do don’t let ur mind overtake your actions.
I was 13 years old when I first started and now I’m 20 years old within my teenage years I’ve always questioned if I’m the weirdo for not having sex because I was the social awkward person. I’ve been dealing with poor mental health just by beating off for the past six years of my life I tried so hard not to give in. Also, I never thought I was worthy enough to go to speak with a girl due to my lack of communication and confidence mostly because I have a fear of rejection. Even though it’s wrong to watch articles of a girl just getting railed by another person is gross it really messed me up. After seeing this article just now You Matt gave your experience and that really gave a reality check to prove to myself I can improve my mental health and build confidence to walk up and build a relationship with my future girlfriend. So once Matt thank you for showing me the light and giving a new perspective you gained all of my respect you have made my whole year thank you
I literally have two close friends of mine and they already have a girlfriend the moment I graduated high school with them. I never had my first girlfriend to begin with, I have hit puberty, and I do not feel the pressure at all! It’s like either I am immune to this “pressure” or I am actually meant to remain single for generations to come. With the way society, being a virgin is like achieving a trophy.💯
I turned 20 recently, and for the last 2 years sex and girls were the thing I’ve been thinking about the most. It’s not like I’ve been insecure about being a virgin, I’ve just been envy and felt alone. I only had some sort of a girl once, when I was 17, after high school. But this relationship didn’t last long cause of my awkwardness, and I didn’t even get to kiss her. From the very start of the university I was studying online (first year due to covid, the second due to the war in my country). I couldn’t even had a conversation with girls, just was sitting at home studying and playing games, rarely hanging out with my friends. With time my anxiety about sex was getting bigger and bigger, and eventually I even lost my focus on studying and working out. I was perusal this fucking instagram stories and reels, seeing girls from my school living their best life, especially the girl I liked 2 years ago. She doesn’t realy like to show her life, but she always make stories for “best friends” to share something special, like a new boyfriend. And the moment I saw new photos of her with a guy hugging her or just hanging out, I was starting to imagine how that guy fucked her, thinking why the f he could do this, and I couldn’t, burning with rage. That was repeating nearly every fucking day. And now, thanks to the guys like you who make this kind of articles for young men, I’m eradicating this anxious thoughts and returning focus on my goals. Thanks.
I remember my mom telling me my sister’s experience where even girls would mock her for being a virgin at what 15 or 16? They would mock her so much they pressured her to go do it. And soon enough she did. And she hated it ofc but…well. She soon got rid of those people and got herself better but it still kind of bugged me man. And I am glad I had friends who wouldn’t focus on anything like that so we weren’t pushed on it or have any need for it. Good things take their time man.
I’m 21 and i’m kind of a Virgin. So basically i felt the “society”/friends pressure just like you and i felt like i needed to do something about it. Few months ago i had to go to Germany for a month for work and i knew that in Germany pronstitution was legal; so i thought “this is my opportunity, i’m so far away from home none is gonna know it”. I did what i wanted to do and luckly i came before even starting to have actual sex, i say luckly because it was one of the worst experience of my life: i felt like everything was wrong, it was against my ethic and i Didn’t really wanted to do it, i was there just because of the pressure i was feeling. To be honest i’m still sad about it and i still regret it because i feel like i may have ruined what it’s gonna be my “really” first time. Did i just sold out my virginity to a fucking prostitute ?! I hope i Didn’t because i might not forgive me for the rest of my life Ps. Sorry for my english
I’m a guy, 19yo currently and never held hands with a girl, kissed or had sex. But I feel like many guys in my age are like this, there are some exemptions but I guess it’s mostly girls losing their virginity earlier. I think there’s a study saying that less and less young men are having sex and I find that to be a good development, the only problem is acceptance in society, especially for younger people. Some of my female friends lost their virginity at age 14 and are proud of that, while my male friends are rather focusing on university, gym or self improvement 🙂
i’m currently 16 and going into my senior year. my birthday is late so next year in 2024 i turn 18 in November. i haven’t had any romantic relationship with a guy and although i sometimes get sad seeing all my friends with boyfriends i also see all the toxic relationships. I’m honestly proud to still be a virgin and not lose it to a guy who does not deserves me or treats me like i should be treated.
Same here, a girl. Jus turned 22 the other day. I’m not shy. I like socializing and I’m ambivert. I think being a virgin is something that can be proud of. Ppl keep saying ohh why are u still single or not in a relationship you have to go out there experience it” I guess we’re all have diff mindset and I understand. As for me, I’m waiting bcs I feel that I’m not ready and whenever I feel pressure or like feel the rush to be in an RS. There’s always someone like my boy college classmate would say something like and shares a bit of advice to me bcs I shared what I’m going through in my life, a gist o it. He said, don’t be rush. If the God say Yes, Yes. If the God say No, No. I’m not a religious person but it’s eye opening for me. I’m so happy and grateful that there are people out there like me who feels the same way. Love from Philippines
I’m 23 and I’m a virgin. Not because of religion or by choice but because after my adolescence I had an identity crisis and after that everything went downhill, I lost contacts with my friends and since then I have been very lonely, a loneliness that has cost me hard episodes of anxiety and that hit my self-esteem very hard. But little by little I am meeting new people and I don’t put pressure on myself to stop being a virgin, I know that at some point I will, and when I do I just want to make the other person enjoy, that it’s not a cold encounter, I’m not thinking about it being something flooded with love either, although there has to be something, I say… I don’t idealize it, I’m just moving along a different path than most, and that’s not bad, everyone has their life, their lessons learned and to be learned. It’s okay if you haven’t experienced many things yet, as long as you don’t give up and have a practical attitude to change that, but without falling into despair, the first thing is to love yourself, no matter how clichéd it sounds, love yourself, open up to others, we are all human beings, with our dreams, flaws, ambitions and embarrassments, show yourself as you are, is the only advice I can give you.
20 year old virgin here. I’ve never been in a relationship, never had my first kiss, nothing. I’ve also, believe it or not, never watched porn either. I have pretty bad social anxiety and have a really hard time connecting with people as a result. I still feel kind of embarrassed for myself, but this article made me feel a bit more confident. Thank you.
This article popped up randomly and I decided to click it just to listen to what you had to say. I am religious and waiting until marriage so I definitely don’t feel pressured. It made me realize that I also don’t have people in my life who judge me based off of my virginity. If anything that can be a way for me to determine the type of people I don’t want to be around. You’re right how hookup culture is disgusting. If anything, not having hooked up with anyone is a good thing because I can get together with a girl who is also a virgin and religious. People claim that those don’t exist anymore but I’m optimistic.
19 year old here! Loved to hear from your experience. I have a girlfriend and we’ve been dating since we were 15. Almost four years of relationship and we are both still virgins. Since the beginning we decided to wait until marriage because we are christians, although we’ve had some moments in our lives where it has almost happened… We are still pure. I love her and I want to do everything with her in the right time. However I got to the point where I was getting worried about it because literally every person I know of my age have lost it. But with your article, I think Im doing the right thing.
I’m still a virgin and I really appreciate this account. I was just told today after revealing that I am over 35 y/o and still a virgin that something is wrong with me. I wish I could just find someone who understands this. I’m a great person with a beautiful soul and a lot to offer. This made me feel a lot better about myself and has changed my overall perspective of men. Thank you again for this!
This article is a great watch for those who are eager to jump into relationships. Personally, I was 21 when I encountered the right person. While some might consider this late, it never bothered me much. I did grapple with self-doubt and questioned myself extensively, wondering if I would be destined for eternal solitude. Insecurity loomed over me. I was convinced that I would never cross paths with “the one.” However, out of the blue, it happened. I crossed paths with the perfect girl, and we fell deeply in love. We took the necessary time to understand each other. After a while, we shared our first intimate moment, and it was truly special. I am overjoyed that I exercised patience and refrained from hurrying into a relationship with someone I didn’t genuinely appreciate. Waiting for the opportune moment is crucial; eventually, it will present itself.
I am a woman and it happened to me the same as you. It was at 18, it was basically due to social pressure. Today I am a somewhat asexual person, it doesn’t attract my attention as much as other people, I don’t need it, I can go years without having sex, it doesn’t make me lose sleep. Sex, like all things, is something that if you like it and want to do it, great. But if not, great too.\r As a society we are forced to have sex just because the social norm dictates “do you have genitals? Well, have sex, that’s what it’s for” And no, not really. \r Not having sex or not having lost your virginity doesn’t make you weird. Don’t ever forget that. \r AND IF SOMEONE LAUGHS OR MOCKS AT YOU FOR NOT LIKE SEX OR FOR NOT LOSING YOUR VIRGINITY, SMILE, TURN AROUND AND GO MOVE THAT NICE ASS GOD GAVE YOU AND DO SOMETHING BETTER WITH YOUR TIME, DON’T LISTEN TO THOSE PEOPLE .
This article is awesome, the problem about todays society is, that many things that are (morally) wrong/weird are accepted and shown as good, quick example, I saw a short article on instagram where people were flexing with their debts. Like wtf? that’s not something you should be proud of, the same goes with so many other topics like being a virgin. I am turning 20 this year, had 1 girlfriend for like 3 weeks and I am still a virgin and I want to tell anyone who thought to work on their self, just do it, going to the gym improved my life so much, maybe you’ve heard it a million times, but its just true. Not only will you feel better, you will learn social interaction and meet new people and friends ( I got into the gym last summer and today I know like half of the people there).Yeah there are creeps and the stereotypical people but till today I just seen 1 maybe 2 of them, for those who are afraid they will be judged, the reality is, most people there are so focused they don’t even know you are there. Go with a friend or ask the trainers or the “strong” people, these are (from my experience) the nicest ( nearly everybody is nice, but these are especially) and will help you anytime. You can get really good advice from them for free and the people there mostly have other good habits and if you can surround you self with them you will start doing them to. Well I could write an entire book about why going to the gym is good for you, but lets cut it here, hope I could motivate some people to improve them self.
I’m 28 & I’ve kinda looked at sex as a competition because of my peers. I am glad I never listened to my friends in high school. I went to college right after high school and still to this day they ask if I have a girlfriend. It’s refreshing to stumble across a person in a yt article who sees things the same way I do and is proud of it. We all have something we enjoy and are good at whether it’s a good laugh or playing call of duty. As i read through some of the other comments I don’t feel alone in this and I am glad other ppl understand it. Thank you Matt you are doing something right on this platform. To everyone who reads this “You Are Appreciated Don’t Let Someone Control Your Actions”
I was insecure a lot, I had my first kiss with a girl a few months ago, I was really happy that I started dating etc. Now I’m really mad to who I gave my first kiss to. A month ago, I met a girl which I fell in love with, I’m mad that my first kiss wasn’t with a girl I love… Fortunately I didn’t hookup with that first girl (but it was close lmao) and lost my V card to a girl I love. Wish y’all luck, and remember to not rush things and wait for a right person 🙂 (I’m 17 if anyone cares) <3
Im 23 now and I had chances but something always felt wrong about doing it just because. I don’t wanna do it with just anyone,I wanna do it with the right person and person who really loves me. I’m sure it can’t be as good as when person you’re comfortable with and who loves you for who you are instead of someone you know for just a few months or a hooker. To anyone of my generation,don’t feel pressured,be comfortable with it because you’re “clean” and want to save yourself for your soulmate. Don’t give up on your body too easy,save yourself for someone special so you both can feel special when it comes to sex.
27 here and I know that feeling when you don’t feel ready. I have had been in a relationship in the past but didn’t feel comfortable to lose my virginity. It’s a relief I am not the only one. I can feel comfortable with being a late bloomer. I would say it made me feel sad and anxious when intimacy didn’t work out in a past relationship. I also struggle with communication and have been thinking about going to counselling to improve it. Awesome article and so comforting! 😊🫰🏻
Im 28 female virgin and i had pressure growing up even now in my late 20s ive had pressure to have sex with men that liked sleeping around with many women. Ive never told any of my friend groups that im a virgin because they seem to have a very immature mentality so i keep it to myself. I no longer have any friend groups since last year and i feel comfortable as a virgin even proud to still be one. Im not feeling in a rush to lose it and honestly i dont mind dying a virgin. It really doesnt matter to me anymore. Its not the most important thing in life especially when ive been coming closer to the Lord. That has been a stronger focus to me lately.
I lost my virginity at 27, I am a woman. It happened exactly 10 years ago, and I can assure you it was a serious mistake. Fortunately, I have never cared about others’ opinions, which is why it took me so long. Besides, I had modeled for many years, so prospects were never lacking for me. What I want to say is that it’s a grotesque experience if you do it with someone who pressures you and doesn’t share your values. I thought only women felt this disgust, but I’ve also heard many men say the same. Please, if you’re going to do it, make sure it’s with someone who shares your values. Don’t feel pressured to do something you don’t want to because you will regret it for the rest of your life. Besides that, you become intertwined with the person. In my case, with that first serious boyfriend, I looked terrible physically, and thanks to that, I ended the relationship. With my husband, it didn’t happen the same way… take care of your body as if your life depended on it.
I lost my virginity at 20 (I’m now 22) and am in a happy relationship with the same person, but lately I’ve felt so much shame for not losing it earlier at 16 or 17 (especially in high school). I tried a lot of apps, working out, etc. until I met my now girlfriend (who I didn’t meet through those apps and who did not care much about my body). But I still a lot of times feel shame for not having the experience until now, and this article’s just a wonderful message for people to hear about the pressure of losing virginity at a certain age.
I’m not married and I’m in my 30s. I’m proud to be a virgin. Nothing wrong with that and I certainly don’t feel bad about not sleeping with anyone. In fact as a Christian it’s very important to me to save myself for my husband someday. Not only that but it’s a really special moment that should be cherished and done with the love of your life. Of course there’s possibilities of getting pregnant and it’s quite selfish to bring a baby into the world with unstable parents who were together for a one night stand or even a few times but not out of love. No, I’m not ashamed of my virginity, in fact quite the opposite. I hope to get married someday and when the night comes, it will be a very special moment.
I gave my virginity at 18 years old to the same girl I’m with right now. It’s been 2 years and I know that’s not enough to know that she is the one but I’m so happy that we gave our virginity to each other knowing that it is somebody I truly love and care about with all my heart. So gratefull I didn’t stick my stick inside a hole that has already been poked in by a million other sticks like all the other people around me did. It is truly an amazing thing to share this with the girl I love and we both take care of each others virginity. I just want to say that it doesn’t matter how old you are, don’t f*ck a random girl to impress others or boost your self-worth, just wait it out and one day there will be a person that will accept you and accept the fact that you are a virgin. Even though I’m not a virgin, I truly respect all virgins and VIRGINITY FUCKING ROCKS
Regardless on different people’s perspectives on the matter of virginity, despite the somewhat increasing awareness of its discontents and dangers (especially in regards to the exploitation of others, its use as a vice and a maladaptive coping mechanism, the spreading of diseases, the complications of birth control, arguments over abortion and unwitting pregnancies), the allure of sexual activity still persists. Within the context of peer pressure or loneliness, a factor to consider is how sexuality is often conflated with maturity and experience, making virginity a mark of childhood innocence that needs to be shed in order to not be left behind and move along with the rest of the group and avoid, creating a fear of missing out on a crucial experience and a shame of not being able to cross the threshold. However, the amount of discontent and danger being discussed on the subject is a clear reason to not be taken in by that allure and honestly question wether the fear of being different and alone is worth the potential cost of one’s health and safety
Thank you for this, I’m a 18 year old woman and yes I’m still a virgin and yes I’m saving myself for someone who actually loves me and that may take a long time because I have to go out and talk to people and it’s fine if It takes times to find the right one but I’ll wait I do not wanna lose it to just anyone (Edit: I’m actually going to wait til marriage if I find the one, I still don’t wanna give it up to anyone and if I don’t find the one well it’s fine by me) have a good day to everyone who is commenting on this comment and stay safe
Thanks for this man I’m in the same situation you were in now I’m 16 and feel insecure abt my virginity and all my friends talking about sex all the time. I haven’t dated a girl in over a year because my social skills are just shit and I feel like an outlier around everyone thank you for this needed this bro
I’m 28 and lost my v at 18. If you haven’t lost it yet and you’re in your twenties (or teens) please don’t for the sake of it, please don’t out of being envious. When I look back at my teens and earlier twenties there are huge insecurities around everyone you meet and you only realise it in hindsight. Anyone who brags, anyone who mocks you, anyone who makes you feel insecure are the ones tossing and turning over their own insecurities and hurting you for it. Also – people just lie. Your twenties are stressful and a very desperate time. If you lose your innocence out of mockery, or by trying to fit in, you also join the side of life that exhausts your pleasure and makes you miserable that so many people fall into and life feels spoiled and rotten. Living your best life is keeping your purity, holding onto passion and what you feel is right.
I hear “body count” used overwhelmingly in a pejorative sense, as disgust for someone’s record of poor past judgment (usually a woman’s, but increasingly applied to men too as it should), and that is exactly as it should be. Even when I grew up, at the height of the glorification of pussyhounding, there was at least some recognition that quality of your sexual conquests mattered as well as quantity. Of course carried to this extreme this would mean that the real flex would be to bag one single top-shelf woman, and thankfully these are exactly the values that are blowing up more and more with each passing year. It’s a really good, encouraging social development in a world that sorely needs them.
25 year old virgin here. always lacked the confidence due to my weight growing up. Lost 100 lbs and am gaining some confidence, finally. Always turned more towards long distance relationships because i felt too ugly to be seen with in person due to the amount i was bullied in school. To fit in i used to lie, even to my closest friends about having sex. A lot of people are like “you should be proud to be a virgin” but for people like me, it just wasn’t a choice. I was an outcast, never had many friends, and never enjoyed drinking or smoking weed so i never really hung out with the friends i did have, outside of school, nor did they ever invite me because they knew i didn’t do any of that. That all being said. As a teen i never wanted to be a virgin. I told people otherwise to hide that fact. But now, even though it wasn’t a choice, now it is. I choose to stay a virgin until the right person comes along and i feel like they’re the right person. Hopefully soon. Not because i wanna have sex, but for companionship. Don’t lie about it, i have to live with that now. i can never tell my best friend that i didnt actually have sex when i said i did, and holding “true” to that for years. Be honest with yourself and give yourself a break. it will happen when the time is RIGHT. Everything happens for a reason.
I’m 22 and I’m still a virgin. In high school I felt that pressure to be intimate with someone because so many of the girls around me were doing it. After high school I lost the pressure and I realized that I wasn’t the problem for being a virgin. Being demisexual (it means you have no physical or romantic attraction to anyone unless you build an emotional bond with them first) I’ve never met anyone that made me want to have sex or anything and I’m happy that way. I’m not saving myself for marriage or anything but when I get intimate with someone I want it to be with someone I know well and trust. As it stands I have no urges to jump into a relationship or even have sex with anyone at all and I’m happy the way I am. I used to feel embarrassed for being a virgin but now I’m actually really proud of myself because I know that if I did something just because of the pressure, I would’ve regretted it for the longest time
I’m a virgin 21 and male. Sometimes I feel bad about it because I know the main reason why people don’t wanna date me, or have any kind of relationship, is because I look VERY young. I’ve stoped even considering having a relationship, and just resorted to wait until I look old enought to be respected by others of my age. Glad to see that i’m not alone on this. But it still sucks a little bit.
Being a Muslim perusal this is so great, you have such a clean and wise perspective. Much sex with multiple partners was never and will never be an achievement, it’s becoming overrated for nothing. What truly matters is which person you’re having this physical intimacy with. Our bodies are sacred and not everyone deserves to see them or get the benefit of them, it should be the one who really cares for you and loves you to take the GREAT OPPORTUNITY to discover your body. The problem with this generation is including sex in fun activities, while it is much more important and sacred in our religion.
As a 16 year old man virgin, and a becoming Christian, and trying to quit pornography after 5 years of being addicted.. i kinda needed this article. I dont talk about my sex life to anybody. Because i know that 90% of the kids in my class have lost their virginity, and my own friends have surpassed my boundaries, trying to hook me up with total whores, and total red flags. I almost instan ditched those friends and just focusing on myself. Moral is.. focus on yourself and stay a virgin til marriage
I’m well aware this article ain’t for me since I feel like I’ve made myself functionally asexual and aromantic by just not caring about sex or love ever. But I’m definitely saving this article so that I might be able to help anyone I know in the future if they need it. Although I myself do not need this article, I thank you on the behalf on the many people it will help. Very well done 🙂
Yo bro, thanks for the advice you gave in one article. I was also stuck with free sex and pornography since I was 19 years old or around Junior High School. I’ve been stuck until I’m 22 in 2023.\r \r It’s an unpleasant journey of life in my opinion. Where when you have done that, after that you feel sorry for what you have done. Until one day my genitals experienced itching due to masturbation too often (sorry maybe this is too sensitive, but I admit that I did it when I was influenced by free sex).\r \r Now I have made a promise to myself and to God that I will stop doing that again. I’ve deleted all those things from my phone and laptop.\r \r So, when I start to feel myself empty and I don’t know what to do anymore, from now on I will do positive things, such as reading books, keeping a diary, keeping journals / notes on motivation for life, as well as sports, and even playing games. The point is don’t make yourself feel empty and don’t know what else to do.\r \r Once again, I thank you bro.
Male, 19 here. I occasionally feel insecure about being a virgin but then I realize that itd be pretty easy to loose it. I wouldnt say im high on the attractive scale but i have had my fair share of relationships (6-7), from my friends telling me theyre all at least 7 and above, and most of them being older than me, it kinda just gives me alil boost of confidence. Ive almost lost it (Super close! like just alil further push and it wouldve slipped in) but i backed down for some reason and i really dont regret it. I respect virgins because of all the hysteria of having bodies and you kinda just live in this world where its such a flex to some people.
I’ve lost mine at 25, trust me, I was one of those who had a huge stigma because of it and put it on a pedestal as a grand achievement. Did it feel good? Yes, but another issue arose. If you put a huge emphasis on it from a side of insecurity and shame, once you get that, you will think off another thought to put on a pedestal and stigmatize it, such as “will this be the only time I receive it?” or “is this the only person I’m going to be sleeping with?”. This might seem simple but if you got it through a relationship, this will sabotage it. Trust me, I’ve been there. So what I want to say is – never ever make this your goal or overthink much about it, you will feed your mind to chase or desire things that are just feeding your ego by proving something to yourself. Stay true to yourself and never label yourself as a lesser, unworthy or undesirable. Just enjoy all other aspects of your life to its fullest, look after yourself and that time will come naturally. This might not relate to everyone but that’s how I felt, and I really wish to convey this to anyone reading that you should never feel ashamed of this, ever.
i’m in this exact situation of being pressured by other people to lose my virginity. mostly because a lot of people think i HAVE already lost it from my physical outlook. i’m only 16, and i’ve been talking to this girl but we’ve been having issues. i originally left her, but thinking about losing my virginity with her sucked me back into it. after seeing this article though, it’s making me believe my only intentions with her were to do it and nothing else. now i’m figuring out it may be an awful idea for her sake and mine. i’ve been in the stage of talking to girls for about two years now, and originally i always just wanted a relationship but now i feel like i’ve changed from that mindset. jumping right into it truly isn’t the way to go about a relationship, thank you for this article Matt.
I am 28 years old and still a virgin. I was mad at myself for reaching that age and not doing anything about it but after perusal this article, I realized it’s okay that I didn’t do it at an earlier age and its doesn’t mean I missed something. It’s true that those I know have already done it but that doesn’t mean I’m not better than them. In my past I had social anxiety because of school so I wouldn’t go out to parties and interact with girls because of lack of confidence and fear. It took me a long time to rebuild myself and I can say that I am still in the process of reaching my goal.\r A person must first of all learn to love himself and only then will he be able to love the other and that way the relationship will be good, healthy and faithful.
This article really helped me a lot I’ve been struggling with this topic a lot, I can’t believe I even became so depressed just because I didn’t lose my virginity, as a Christian who learns that sex is only allowed after marriage but all my other friends are Christians and they all lost their virginity, my best friend even quoted “I want to have a-lot of sex in my teenage years before I die” and yeah both my bestie lost theirs, I felt so lonely n depressed bc they all can talk about their experience and I was older then them and still haven’t lost it, I had a bf at that time but I wanted to follow the rules where God said it is beautiful thing but only when we are married but now me n my bf broke-up I’m still virgin I’m 17 now n tbh I don’t mind waiting till I’m married or lose it to the one I will spend the rest of my life with, this article helped me alot with my insecurity
I’m a christian, often times whenever I hang out with my other friends who mainly don’t believe in God, they ask about body counts and sex experience. Sometimes they think I’m weird for not wanting to have sex (mind you they’re all 17-18). I’ve always believed that sex is a gift from God, something given to us to enjoy responsibly within marriage. I replied with “We have different morals, not everyone appeal to the same thing in this world” and I’m glad they realized that now. We’re all good friends and living prosperous lives now,
I’m a 24 year old guy who has never had sex, never kissed a girl, never been on a date, nor been in a relationship. I’m an introvert and I live on a farm in a rural area so I don’t have many opportunities to meet women and socialize with them anyway. It bothers me sometimes if I spend too much time on social media, but I honestly don’t see the point of getting with someone whom you don’t share a connection with just to have casual sex. Rather save it for someone you love.
I was 14 when I first started perusal porn. It was actually an accident that I got into it. I was curious about a topic that apparently people made fetish art about and that took me down a rabbit hole of senseless masturbation probably 3-4 times a day. Being a Christian, that’s not the type of life I was supposed to be living. I wouldn’t say I don’t still struggle with that lust for instant pleasure, but it’s a whole lot easier to reject that now than it was when I was 14. Once you’re an addict to something, it takes time to get off of it. Anyone who is still struggling with perusal porn and masturbating, just do something else when that lust comes after you. Literally anything else, like working out and exercising, going on a walk, reading your Bible if you have one and/or praying if you have access to the throne room of Heaven. there are countless and more profitable things you could be doing instead of wasting a whole session of hours just to play with your genitals. It’s just a waste of your time and it does nothing but harm you in the process mentally. It’s vain. I know it’s easier said than done, but you have to cut some things out like screen time or whatever in order to get away from that junk.
I’m a 16-year-old girl. I found God a few years back and made a commitment to wait till marriage. All my friends around me are 14, 15, 16, and or 17 and they are doing things I can’t even comprehend. I know the pressure of losing your virginity is so REAL because we live in a hook-up culture. Thank you for the article! This was something everyone like me needed to hear<3
My husband and I waited until we got married. I was ridiculed by a lot of people because I was one of the only virgins in my late teens and early 20s. I knew that a lot of guys that expressed interest weren’t serious or marriage material, so I saved myself for my husband so that I would only form a strong emotional attachment to someone I could trust, who wouldn’t break my heart. Two years into the marriage, I still don’t regret my decision. Anyone who is still a virgin, and might feel like the odd one out, my two cents is that you are set apart for a good reason, not a bad one. This world is asks backwards, and you’re not meant to fit in it. Period. You are on a higher level than them and you have potential and respect that they don’t, thats why they envy you. Love y’all, and f*** anyone who tells you otherwise. <3