The concept of “upstaging the bride” refers to someone drawing more attention to themselves than the bride on her wedding day. This can happen in various ways, such as wearing a highly formal or revealing outfit. Wedding planner Illy Elizabeth states that upstaging the bride should never be an intention as the guest. In other parts of the world, such as Middle Eastern, Baltic, and West Asian cultures, it is important to strike a balance and avoid going overboard.
To upstage a bride, it is important to strike a balance and avoid going overboard. It is also essential to consider the wedding setting and theme, as upstaging should be done in a tasteful and subtle manner. To avoid upstaging the bride, it is important to choose an outfit that is appropriate for the occasion, such as an elegant dress or suit that is complementary to the wedding style. It is also important to choose a color that is not traditionally associated with the bride, such as white or ivory.
People who upstage the bride deliberately wear an outfit that is guaranteed to capture the attention of the assembled guests. They choose the occasion to make their own announcement, such as “Im getting engaged,” “Im pregnant,” or “It’s my birthday.” Upstaging the bride should never be an intention as the guest.
In conclusion, upstaging the bride should never be an intention as the guest. It is crucial to strike a balance and avoid going overboard when dressing up. It is also important to be respectful and considerate towards the bride and her special day, and to choose an outfit that complements the wedding style.
📹 ‘I Wasn’t Trying To Upstage You,’ Insists Mom Who Denies Ruining Daughter’s Wedding
A daughter claims her mother ruined her wedding day by making her late, wearing a white dress, and breaking into song just as …
What is too revealing for a wedding?
Show off your outfits. Don’t wear revealing clothes, says Sabatino. Crop tops, dresses with mesh, short skirts, plunging necklines, and form-fitting gowns are more appropriate for a night out than a wedding. A skimpy outfit will attract negative attention and take away from the bride. “Think about that your family and elders are there, not at the club,” says Avrumson. A wedding is sacred. If you’re wearing a low-cut dress, make sure it’s long enough.
Uncomfortable shoes. Think about what’s appropriate for the setting and venue, says Sabatino. If the wedding is in a natural setting, wear flats instead of heels. Don’t wear stiletto heels in grass all night or go home early because of painful shoes.
What do you wear to upstage the bride?
Nothing too revealing. Skimpy cocktail dresses are for parties; wear something more conservative. Dresses and skirts should be knee-length and cleavage should be covered. Wedding guest dress etiquette is about not upstaging the bride. Avoid plunging necklines. Denim jeans are not appropriate. Even if the invitation says casual, avoid jeans and wear well-tailored trousers. Overdressing is better than underdressing. Avoid sheer or see-through material. Wearing something see-through is embarrassing. Flip-flops are not appropriate. Don’t wear flip-flops to a wedding. If you’re going to a summer wedding and don’t want to wear heels, wear flats. Animal print. Animal print isn’t dressy enough for a wedding. If you love patterns, choose something subtle like polka dots or stripes. A new T-shirt might be appropriate for a casual wedding, but slogans don’t look good.
Image source: weddingwire.ca/wedding-ideas/50-things-wedding-guests-should-never-do–c378.
What colors to avoid wearing at a wedding. Wear bold, bright colors to a wedding. They’re fun and make wedding photos look great. Avoid these colors:
Is it rude to upstage the bride?
Bridal style expert Shelley Brown says, “Don’t upstage the bride or the couple.”
On my TikTok Explore page, Angela Pham asked her followers a question. She started by explaining her problem. “Please help: “I need your opinion on this controversial matter,” she said. Then she wondered if a vintage Carolina Herrera gown would upstage the bride at an upcoming wedding. The gown had a black bodice and a cream-colored drop waist. People had different opinions. If you’re getting ready for a wedding and wondering if your clothes are right, read these tips from wedding experts. Nobody wants to deal with snarky comments about inappropriate outfits or feeling upstaged on their wedding day. Some brides don’t mind what their guests wear, but others do. Guidelines and expert advice can help with this tricky subject. Don’t wear white unless they say it’s OK. Shelley Brown, a bridal style expert and former senior editor at The Knot, says, “Don’t upstage the bride or the couple.” Not wearing white is the most obvious guideline. It competes with the brides gown. Avoid light pastel colors that can look white in flash photography unless requested. Some couples now ask guests to wear white or white-themed attire. If it’s not on the invitations, don’t use white or similar colors.
Is it possible to outshine the bride?
Wedding Experts View. Wedding expert Zoe Burke told Newsweek that it’s impossible to outshine the newlyweds on their wedding day. The couple will be unmistakable, even just by their glow. Weddings have cultural significance, so guests may want to wear culturally significant clothing. I’d see it as a sign of respect, not to outshine anyone. If you’re unsure about your outfit, you can send a photo to the couple and ask if it’s OK. Some guests have worn white or lace outfits. If they don’t want you to wear it, they should explain why. If you don’t agree, you can decline the invitation.
Is it rude to outdress the bride?
Staying within the dress code lets the couple shine. It’s rude and disrespectful to upstage the groom or bride. To keep your reputation and look great, here are a couple tips.
“You’re too loud.” The loudest person in the room is the weakest. – Denzel Washington as Frank Lucas in American Gangster. Best wedding guest suits. Suits are appropriate for most weddings. Staple dark tones, such as black, navy, or charcoal, will be perfect for the occasion. If it’s spring or summer, tan, light blue, and gray will also look sharp.
What does don’t upstage the bride mean?
Don’t steal the limelight. The wedding is about the bride and groom, so focus on them. Don’t do anything that upsets the bride. Don’t try to steal the show or the photographer’s attention. A child’s wedding is exciting, so you want this day to go perfectly without upsetting the bride. The mother of the bride helps the bride plan and on the wedding day. Avoid these things to keep your relationship strong.
When can you kiss the bride?
8. The Kiss. Now for the good part! After the vows and rings, the two of you kiss to seal the marriage. You’re married!
9. Unity Ceremony. If you’re having a unity ceremony, this is a good time to do it. In a unity ritual, the couple symbolizes their new union with something like lighting a single candle with two candles or binding their hands with a ribbon.
10. Closing Remarks. If your ceremony is religious, say a final prayer. Closing prayers are the same as final blessings after each religious ceremony. The officiant can call for the congregation to bless them. If it’s not religious, the officiant can say words of encouragement, bless them, or read a requested prayer or poem. Prayers usually ask for prosperity, faithfulness, and a strong bond.
What is the anti bride trend?
TikTok’s latest trend aims to change the way brides are portrayed. More brides-to-be are embracing a wedding trend that lets couples ditch traditional wedding traditions for a more personal experience. Many modern brides are having simple weddings. Some are even eloping. In early January, TikToker @knaakwell posted a video about eloping. She cited anxiety and expense as reasons.
Why are you not supposed to see the bride?
This practice started before the 18th century, when arranged marriages were common. It was unlucky for the bride and groom to see each other. This was to stop the groom from backing out of the wedding before the ceremony. Many couples today take a first look instead of waiting to see each other down the aisle. Knowing the history of not seeing each other before the wedding has helped couples decide to have a first look. Wedding Planning Tips: Not sure if a first look is for you? Read more about first looks here.
Is it bad to outshine the bride?
Behave. Everyone agrees. Don’t outshine the bride. Besides not getting drunk, several of our editors have advice for guests who misbehave. “One friend got engaged at a wedding, and people spent the rest of the night congratulating her instead of celebrating the couple getting married,” says one writer. It’s never okay to propose at someone else’s wedding. Another editor remembers someone who got on stage with a scarf on their head and started singing with the band. It’s a good idea to avoid the stage and stay away from the microphones. Speeches at weddings are often embarrassing. One writer had to sit through one for the bride. Don’t bring up an old flame, even if it’s a joke. “It’s never appropriate to make jokes about exes at a wedding.”
How to avoid upstaging the bride?
Don’t wear a dress that will overpower the bridal gown. Avoid loud patterns that will overwhelm photos and make you stand out. Bright or shiny clothes will distract from the bride. Avoid being too casual. While you don’t want to upstage the bride, you should avoid dressing too casually.
📹 wedding guests that tried to be the main character – REACTION
Hey there, fabulous YouTube fam! It’s your girl, Charlotte Dobre, here to spill the tea on some seriously outrageous wedding …
PSA: Never wear a white dress to a wedding unless you’re the one getting married. Edit: Okay y’all, obviously this is just a general rule-of-thumb and there are exceptions. Yes, it is common for the flower girl to wear white, I was more talking about the guests, not the people who are in the wedding because generally the bride chooses what the wedding party wears. And yes, some brides might not wear white, or might want guests to wear whit or some off white color. This is just a general rule to follow, obviously if you are told differently for a specific wedding it doesn’t apply.
Dr. Phil! I just love your show. Sooo much drama and you are so calm and to the point amidst the the confusion that some people are trying to create. Brilliant! I’m taking notes. Priceless tutoring from a true professional. And to the bride: the only person complaining about the boundaries that you’ve set, it the person benefitting from you not having any. I wish you the greatest future going forward with your life partner.
The mother of the bride has Histrionic Personality Disorder. It’s your daughter’s wedding not yours. The mother has to be the center of the attention and she is jealous of her daughter. My mother has always been jealous of me. She could not stand that I was getting married to someone who loves me instead of her having to get married because she was three-months pregnant. She ended up wearing a track suit to my wedding. She said she had an accident, however there were tons of formal wear shops near the wedding venue so she could have bought a new outfit. She always wore formal outfits to my brother’s weddings including wearing expensive hats. But for her only daughter she wears a blue track suit. My parents did not even bother to buy my husband and I a wedding gift or a bridal shower. She did not give her only daughter a baby shower a few years later. Just move on and leave toxic family members behind.
It’s a weird but known rule at weddings that the bride is the only one supposed to be wearing white, the mother knew this then acts like “how is it my fault that I liked the white dress?” seriously? All the colors in the world and all the styles of dresses yet the mother wore white to her daughters wedding? She wanted the spotlight on a day that had nothing to do with her and now her daughter will forever remember how her mom ruined her one special day.
My friend was at a wedding and the maid of honours boyfriend proposed to her, so when she went to the maids wedding the woman who got upstaged announced she was pregnant. Lmao Edit: some of u r saying this is on something called r/pro revenge a reddit but all I know is my friend told me something about a wedding she had been to, so I don’t know
Either way, as the mom, you shouldn’t have to be defending everything you did on the day of your daughter’s wedding. IF you do, you have to STOP and really examine your actions and motives. This is the day for her to shine, and you should ONLY help keep the spotlight on her, or keep others from trying to steal it.NOT take it for yourself.
The evidence of the Holy Spirit in someone’s life is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. (Galatians 5) This mother is being led by a spirit of some kind, but it’s NOT Holy Spirit. She needs to examine herself to see if she is really in the faith. (2 Corinthians 13: 5) This is shameful behavior!
This mother is off her rocker. We all know it. No rational or sane woman behaves this way. Her daughter is beautiful, intelligent, and refined. And her mother is completely jealous of her. Mom just has to be the center of attention. What kind of mom ruins her daughter’s wedding and steals and curses her son and daughter-in-law’s wedding rings? …. A crazy mother, that’s who!👁👁
“Then she comes to the wedding and she decides she wants to catch the Holy Ghost…” 🤣 this girl is an amazing storyteller because her personality shows all the way through when she is talking. I’m so sorry that her mother did this, and what an awful way to support your daughter. “You were not raised in church, there is no way possible…” 🤣 my mom is cringing looking at this. It should not be this funny, because it is upsetting to see how her mother behaved, but I’m glad that although the daughter is mad, she is keeping it together and comical too.
The reason no one wants kids at weddings anymore isn’t so much that kids misbehave it’s because the parents don’t act like parents and make them behave. A chaplain at a church I went to said at the beginning of the service ” Crying, screaming children, like all good intentions, should be carried out immediately!””
I had kids at my wedding and hired a babysitter for them. She was $300 for 4 hours with 12 kids. She got a 30 minute break to eat while the kids ate with their parents. I had the cake lady create blank cupcakes and include decorations the kids could use to decorate their own wedding cupcakes. I think the baby sitter had more fun with the cake decorating than the kids did lol. The kids had their own area within the larger reception space. I covered the tables in rolls of paper and they went to town coloring the tables. Would only change the groom if I redid the day. 😂
Photographed a wedding a few years ago that probably had around a 100+ young kids in attendance. The bride was a preschool teacher and had been for years. She invited all the students in her AM and PM classes along with any siblings. These kids were so well behaved throughout the ceremony as they were so excited to see their teacher get married! I was honestly impressed as when she first told us I thought it was going to be a disaster! She apparently had also discussed in her class ahead of time how to behave at a wedding too. That wedding was definitely an exception though…
I attended a wedding where someone’s kid inserted themselves into the first dance. To my horror the parents didn’t pull the kid away, they laughed and filmed encouraging the kid to continue. Main character by proxy. Thankfully the articlegrapher skillfully got between the kid and the couple whilst filming and with his body maneuvered the kid back to the circle of guests. The parents glared at him with disgust and I wanted to applaud him. Now that I think about it he did it so smoothly that I’m afraid this wasn’t the first time he had to intervene 😬
I was just at a small wedding where the only child was a 2yo who was flower girl. She showed all of us up by being so well behaved throughout the ceremony, the meal and the reception. She sat quietly, got a beautiful dolly for doing such a good job and played with it for the rest of the night. She also sat and ate her meal without making a mess. I did not know 2yo could be so well behaved but her mother clearly does an incredible job.
I photographed weddings for 11 years, and I’ve seen some kids that were wild and disruptive, but like 90% of the time I’ve seen kids at weddings they’ve been completely chill and didn’t cause any issues. The difference is 100% with the parents–I’ve seen some parents who simply don’t understand the concept of teaching their kids to respect others.
I was a professional wedding and funeral attendant for a few years. My job was to dance with awkward people, defuse situations and move rude aunties away from the bride and dump wine on anyone in white. At funerals I changed the subjects, got tissues, called Uber for the drunk or distraught and interrupted speeches. People say disgusting things at funerals.
I recently attended a wedding with my 4 year old little cousin. She was so well behaved and never cause a ruckus. She even took pictures with the groom and bride during the reception and they love her. The bride and groom were so beautiful and my little cousin was so well behaved and sat through the whole thing. There is no excuse for children acting like that with the parents right there.
As a mother to four (well-trained) children, I 1000% understand no kid weddings and am totally on board with them. They’ve been to a couple family weddings and did fine, but generally I leave them home with a sitter because I want to have a good time celebrating the couple with my husband and not have us be on parent-duty.
My sister had kids at her wedding, and she encouraged them to be themselves because she wanted them to enjoy her day too. Nothing bad happened because none of us raised monsters. Grandparents, Parents, Aunts and Uncles took turns calming them down or removing them if they got upset and my sister has loads of cute pictures of her nieces and nephews dancing, chasing each other on the dance floor or hiding behind skirts. Some of the best pictures had the kids in them. The problem is never the kids it’s when no one is willing to take responsibility for the kids.
Went to a wedding that was supposed to be no kids. Parents brought their kid anyway. He spent the ceremony quiet, but at the reception everyone walked in from cocktail hour to find the kid alone in the dining room going elbow deep in the buffet trays eating directly out of them and double dipping EVERYTHING. Caterers had to toss five trays of food. When the caterers were trying to get the unattended child away from the table, he kicked and spit at them. Parents show up FIFTEEN minutes later asking why the kid was upset.
In México, when I was a teenager, there was the wedding of a retired soldier. ( Silver wedding) Before the ceremony all tge parents that brought kids/teenagers with them were directed to the church’s courtyard and asked to stand in formation; a Colonel then gave a Stern warning drill Sargent style for any and all who would be disrespectful during the celebrations (mass or party). The parents were warned to be watchful of their kids and the kids of their parents(so they did not get drunk.) Everyone got along BEAUTIFULLY in that wedding. 😎
I went to my mom’s brother’s wedding as a 4-year-old. I cried because I was tired but wanted to stay, so my dad took me outside to get some fresh air and calm down. He and my mom did that a couple times during the party. I came back with a genuine smile and made it to the end of the party/reception. The groom or bride never had to deal with my 4yo stupid stuff because my parents were, well… parenting.
i’ve been the bestman @ 3 weddings. i told all the other groomsmen, we are security. it is LITERALLY the original job of groomsmen! i posted 1 at each door & told them who wasn’t supposed to be there & stop them then come get me. i pissed off 2 ex’s and 1 family. but the bride & grooms were both quite pleased.
There was an update for the last story! The parents countersued the bride for medical care the kid supposedly required because the cake fell on him. The entitled family is being ostracized by everyone who was at the wedding and the bride has received emails and calls from the crazy parents demanding they drop the suit while badmouthing them on social media. I don’t know if there’s been another update but I can’t help but hope the newlyweds get everything they’re owed and more.
A colleague of mine was really annoying me at work today and was demanding I do all kind of (boring) tasks that he is responsible for, but doesn’t feel like doing. While he was continuing with his rant and demands, I all of a sudden heard Charlotte in my head “Aaaaabsolutely NOT!!” 😂😂 I started laughing and left my colleague very confused 🙈😂
At my wedding I had 2 kids under 6 and 2 teenagers. It was a small wedding so no specific accommodations were made for them but they were well behaved and didn’t need iPads. They danced and played with the balloons, the venue was in the countryside so they ran outside, picked flowers, they gave me a cute bouquet of wild flowers 🥺 and they struck conversations with the adult guests.
I love kids. Ive worked with them in daycare, always babysit for friends and family. Im getting married in 3 months. 3 out of 10 people in the bridal party have young kids (1 of them is my godson). Some of our guests also have kids. We have decided to have a no kids wedding. I know these kids are nice but its my 1 bridezilla moment. Its MY DAY. I dont want to have to deal with kids😂
I just binge all of your articles randomly, I can’t help but listen to drama – it’s so entertaining, and I can confidently confirm that your website should be classed as educational. Being an introverted, anxiety induced, mental mess, I have learnt a lot about people and just social occasions in general. Thank you.
There was a time I was at the hospital for an appointment, and I asked if I could bring my daughter in with me. She told me “she can, as long as she doesn’t run around and cause any trouble.” I replied with a laugh, “I hope not, she’s 24.” I guess kids causing trouble in this hospital had been a regular thing. I also felt flattered, that she thought I looked too young to have an adult child. 😊
My daughter was a flower girl when she was 11 months old. She did amazingly well but I could tell she was getting fidgety during the ceremony so I took her outside to play in the grounds of the Abbey. After that she was fine. With the permission of the bride and groom we took a travel cot to the reception which she sat in playing with her toys and eventually sleeping. She had an incredible time and so did we. Parents need to take responsibility for their kids!
There were kids at my wedding. If the baby cried, mom took her outside. The two year old flower girl was very shy, so we let her stand by my brother, her father who was singing. She and the older flower girls, aged 5 and 6. Sat on the steps by the altar playing quietly together. It didn’t concern us a bit. They looked so pretty and happy that it made everyone happy! When my brother got up to sing his daughter toddled to his side and looked up at him with love. So many people said I had one of the most lovely weddings they’d ever seen. It wasn’t fancy, but the obvious love is what made it so great. We’ve been married for 30 years now and our own children attended many weddings both fancy and casual. They were always well behaved. Also there was never any problem with any of the kids at our reception. They played and danced together but didn’t cause a ruckus. I think you have to be careful, though about the ADULTS and parents you invite. They are the ones who can be trouble! A decent person won’t allow their children to cause harm at a special occasion. If a small child has a tantrum they’ll just remove them until they are calm.
This is why we write down our speeches. That being said, my cousin almost had everyone fall out of their chairs when she mentioned her sister’s first love and said the groom could never replace him. We all thought she meant cousin bride’s first bf. Nope. MoH cousin pulled out the stuffed monkey which was bride cousin’s favorite toy that went everywhere. Told the groom that he still hasn’t broken up with the bride and if the groom ever did anything, she would tell the monkey. Ultimately what we thought was going to be a shocking speech turned very sweet and only something a sister could do.
Omfg that story about the kids absolutely destroying that wedding got me so heated….i would’ve thrown them all out before the ceremony even started, whyyyy did they not have someone kick them out before it got to the point of destroying not only the wedding dress, but the cake too?? I feel so bad for that couple. If my son had ever done something like that when he was younger, he’d only be allowed to leave his (empty) room to use the bathroom. I’m beyond grateful to have a well behaved kid after hearing that story 😂
I invited as many family members, littles included, to my wedding. Only one family brought their four-year-old daughter. She was adorable! Got “she’s a princess!” On my article from her when I walked down the aisle, and a “they lived happily ever after” when we kissed. During the reception, she even sang a song on the microphone. I love the idea of having kids at weddings, but I absolutely believe the parents are the ones who can ruin that for everyone, including their kids.
Bit late to the party but wanted to share a wholesome story with kids at a wedding. At my grandmas wedding my 7yo cousin (at the time) was the ring bearer. When he walked up to present the rings, his little brother also walked up even though he wasnt supposed to. Then the youngest sister, the 2 year old flower girl also walked up with them. Everyone laughed because it was obviously unintended but little kids having silly misunderstandings can be cute.
So I remember being a kid at weddings and absolutely being bored out of my mind. So I knew we’d have kids at our wedding and decided to create something fun for the kids to do and it was a hit. We set up a kids craft table with those little wooden bird houses for them to decorate. I bought stick on decorations and paint crayons and bought kid aprons. I told my planner that I wanted her to make sure that the kids knew that this was for them so that they could have fun and she did. The result was amazing. And I almost bawled when the kids gave my husband and I some of their decorated projects as wedding presents. We also made time to dance with each of the kiddos and our photographers got some of my favorite pics of us with our godchildren ❤
Every wedding I’ve been to that allowed kids, they were well behaved. There was one time where a 1 yr old was tired & fussy but the mom took the baby out of the reception area right away to rock her baby to sleep & there was no disturbance at all to the wedding. If kids are at a wedding, it is the PARENT’S responsibility to keep the kids in check-no one else’s.
I’m a teacher and when I got married, I invited my 2nd grade class. I believe 26 students back then? And of course, all the cousins, neighbors and so on. I even stumbled across an unknown mystery child that I had never met before (turned out to be a foster child who was new in her foster home). My husband and I arranged a bouncing castle, a face painter and some coloring books. A recipe for disaster you might think. Not in this case. They were on their best behaviour! They had a blast and I have amazing memories of that day. Last schoolyear, that class went to highschool and I was welling up during their ceremony a couple of times…
I made my wedding child free (except the one flower girl) because of my friend that brought her two young children to my bridal shower and let them cry and scream through the whole event, never taking them outside to calm them down. When she RSVP’d to the wedding she included her children in the count and I had to call to explain that I wasn’t allowing children. She told me that her children did not do well with babysitters but I stuck to my no-kids rule. I hated that she wouldn’t come but this article makes me extra glad I stuck to it.
I worked as a banquet supervisor and plenty of times I’ve caught myself safeguarding the wedding cake, buffet, and decorations from the kids and trying to rally the kids off the dancefloor for the bride, groom, parent dances. Thankfully I had a great team doing an amazing job so the weddings ran mostly smooth
As someone who’s getting married this Saturday and made a strict no kids allowed rule, I got a lot of flack from friends and family that not allowing kids was creating an unnecessary burden for parents to attend. After hearing the story about the kids at that last wedding, I’m standing by my decision with zero regrets 😂
I at first didn’t want children at my wedding, but my 1.5 year old nephew is literally the only child on either side so we decided to allow him to come. He was not happy for a good portion of the day since he isn’t used to so much attention, but the grandparents handled any issues right away! And now we have pictures of him in the family photos and some adorable ones of him from the reception, so I’m really glad I changed my mind 😊
I had 4 kids under 12 at my wedding. Two were angels, and two were caught running in the street. The keeper of our venue has to corral them into a fenced area and lock it. The mom of those two did not even look at them all night – she just got drunk, smoked a joint and said they were fine on their own. Definitely the parents at fault, not the kids. At one point, a friend of ours picked up her son and handed him to her. She still didn’t get it.
I got married nearly 5 years ago. I have a large family and wanted to keep my wedding simple. My sister was my matron of honor, my husband’s brother was his best man. The rest of my bridal party was nieces and nephews (2 junior brides maids, 2 flower girls, and 3 tiny groomsmen) all under the age of 12. They were perfect little angels, they did so well and it was so special. But they were taught respect and have good parents. It was so special for them, they cried more than my husband and I did…and it is a memory I will cherish forever
The only wedding I’ve ever attended was when I was like one year old. Apparently during the super long Catholic service I was asleep, then at the reception I just ‘butt scooted’ around in a circle on the dance floor for like 2 hours. I did indeed take attention away from the bride and groom since apparently everyone found me hilarious and the best entertainment there. This is the kind of happy things kids can add to a wedding, but I feel like the risk is just too great to have a kid friendly wedding. (Ps me and my older brother were the only kids there. He slept for the service and then sat in a corner playing on a game boy color after the first 20 minutes of the reception)
I had one child at my wedding, in my wedding. She was my best friend’s daughter. Basically, my niece. And she was an absolute angel. 2 years old, and an absolute angel. It’s not the age of the child, it’s the parents’ ability to properly raise that child, which determines how well that child behaves.
14:41 I bet a lot of people thought they were overreacting but 1. It was a special day, supposed to be beautiful. No one can justify that behaviour with “they’re just kids”. The parents let the kids ruin their special day 2. Even setting feelings aside, the rage, sadness, disappointment, that was a lot of money, it’s fair the parents pay it since they could have prevented many of those incidents
I had kids at my wedding, but I did a Lego coloring book corner where they could play and take the legos and coloring books home with them too. And after the wedding what was left over I donated to day cares. The kids were happy the parents were happy and most importantly so was I. But I love the kids and wanted them there.
My sister (the bride) was soooo mad that I left to take my infant home at 9pm. It was an hour and a half drive home minimum for everyone in attendance. I had been there since 8am to help set up, take photos, etc. while trying to fit in breastfeeding in between everything. As soon as the ceremony was over, I was told I’d have enough time to breastfeed before heading into the barn for the reception. I rushed to the bathroom to change my baby and feed him then headed to the barn. Everyone was already sitting and eating. I grabbed what was easy and close and sat down at the wedding party table. As soon as I took a single bite was told it was time to do my speech. I never had time to actually eat anything as I had to attend my baby again, and by the time i was able to search food out, everything was gone. I was exhausted and starving, and my baby was hungry because my supply was so low that day because I wasn’t able to properly care for myself. I wish I had said no to being a part of the wedding party. She didn’t speak to me for a couple of weeks because I left when I did.
I had my own kids (ages 5 and 6) at my second wedding, along with a ton of nieces and nephews and guests’ kids. Legitimately the worst behaved person at my wedding was my mom. Yes, my husband has that MIL. 😮💨 We’ve been married 20 years and finally about 3 or 4 years ago I went EXTREMELY low contact. So much less stress in my life! It’s not these kids’ fault that their parents suck at being parents. Someone needs to teach them what is and isn’t acceptable at a wedding! I now have 6 kiddos and they’ve been to many family weddings. I made sure they had something quiet and appropriate to keep them entertained if there was a possibility they were going to have an issue.
I had a very small wedding reception so there were only about 4 kids under 10, they all knew each other so started getting progressively louder and more energetic the longer they were around each other. After about an hour seeing the energy level get up too high I grabbed the goodie bags I’d prepared and had all the kids come over and said, “I’ve got these gift bags for you but if you want them you have to promise that you’ll all be mindful of the other guests here and not be screaming and running around, can you do that?”. They all agreed and got their bags that had some little toys, activities and foam wearables, they loved it and were totally preoccupied and well behaved the rest of the night. For something super small scale it worked like a charm.
So my husband has this one angel looking niece. She comes up to me one day and says in front of the whole family: “You have a HUGE zit on your cheek!” She was referring to a bursted acne I had which was healing and I couldn’t put makeup on. After getting over the inital shock which had me smiling like this: 😃 I told the girl: “And you don’t have tact!” The girl didn’t understand but I was saying it loud enough so her mother could hear. It’s NOT the first time the girl does/says something that shouldn’t have to a family member, even after they ask her to back off. The mother doesn’t do anything about it (At one point it endangered a baby of the family!) And so now I have this verbal restraining order to my in-laws: “Please keep your child away from me from the age of 4 until they reach puberty.”
My neighbours got married laat July. Since I am good with kids (especially theirs, they’re like my little brother and sister) they ‘hired’ me to be the nanny during the wedding and reception. They had games and toys to keep the kids busy. It was a great wedding👌🏼 All the kids went home before the big party. Their own kids got to enjoy a little bit of the party and when they were tired, I took them home. It was all planned out well. Doesn’t have to be a problem, but the kids from this article are just……. 😂
I remember when that awkwardly racist article went viral. It’s really bizarre. I have mixed children, and can confirm that there are white people who do this stuff all the time. It’s really bizarre that they think it’s okay, or that I somehow chose to have mixed children “because they’re beautiful” as if that was somehow a part of the decision making when I chose my partner. Just… Ew 😬
I was a bridesmaid at my aunts wedding quite a few years ago now and since I was the bridesmaid I had to walk down the aisle with her, well my aunt kept speeding up and then slowing down so it was really difficult for me to keep up with the pace, guess what? I stepped on the back of her dress, I apologised quietly and she continued, she was so calm about it, and I have so much respect for my auntie and I loved the ceremony but I always apologise about it happening and now it’s a little joke that me and her have. The ceremony was beautiful and I was honoured for being her bridesmaid🤍 I love my auntie
i’ve been a babysitter at weddings since i was 13. me and my family have lots of friends and family and for the first few wedding i attended if i did end up perusal a kid it was more like volunteering, a parent would be doing something important and i would notice child doing something that may or may not end in disaster so i would step in. but at the third wedding, right as i walked in a mom (her kids were ok but still needed to have an eye kept on) asked if i would watch her kids during the wedding. i was leaning towards no but she offered a pretty penny and after that i LOVED weddings if i heard a wedding was coming up i couldn’t wait! some families would reach out to me a day or two before the wedding and ask if i would watch their kids during the service.
I recently took my 2 year old toddler to her first wedding and I was worried because she can be loud. But I made a game plan I brought books toys and various snacks to keep her busy during the entire event and if she got to loud my husband and I would take turns taking her outside to run around a bit, we only stayed for 2-3 hours because we had another wedding reception to pop into but she did not make a fuss a single time all of the things I brought played a huge part. Now I know that these things won’t work for every kid but as a parent your child is your responsibility if you don’t think you can control your child during a wedding get a babysitter! The parents audacity in the story blaming the bride for not making arrangements to entertain the children blows my mind how entitled people can be is insane
Getting married in two days and had a big fight with my mother about not inviting the children of my cousin (kids 1 and 3). After speaking with the wife of my cousin and mother of the children she told me she already had a babysitter for 2 months so not to worry, it was my uncle and my mom who insisted. After perusal this article I am glad with my decicion (english is not my first languages, so sorry for any spelling mistakes)
Just going to say that the problem wasn’t the crotch goblins … the problem was the adult goblins that brought them. The SECOND my kids misbehaved in public they were snatched up and we left. At a restaurant? Nope, we’re leaving and I’ll feed you PB & J at home. In the store? We’re leaving and no you aren’t getting a toy or snack. At the park? Nope, we’re going home and you can play in the backyard by yourself. Having kids at a wedding is fine … but asking them to leave if they misbehave is ALSO fine. That is what bridesmaids, groomsmen and ushers are for.
I’m a kid and I’ve always done my best to be good at weddings after being good we all have a blast I’m going to my cousins wedding and I’m super excited to go to Mexico and finally meet her. But I will always remember to be on my best behavior so the bride and groom can have their best and most special moments of the wedding end in a happy and festive mood!
My niece wore a lacy white dress to my daughter’s first wedding. We couldn’t say anything cause I honestly think she didn’t know any better. She was so pleased with her self my sister made a point to tell us she bought the dress just for the wedding. They aren’t the type of ppl who would try to ruin the wedding. She just didn’t know it was inappropriate to wear white at someone else’s wedding.
My husband and I had kids at our wedding and everything went wonderfully. There was only about 7 kids total. I had made little coloring books, little packs of crayons for the kids when sitting at table when everyone is eating and later on when everyone could dance, I handed out glow sticks 🙂 Kids had a blast running around and dancing. The biggest issue is when parents can’t respect the bride & groom during their big day, don’t let your kids run havoc on everything. That’s incredibly rude.
I can understand this, but to brighten the mood a little I have a story to share :3 back when I was twelve (given I’m a teen now) I was asked to be the flower girl to my great aunt’s daughter’s wedding. I’m a well behaved bubbly kid at the time. I was supposed to walk the ring holder (a little boy, about toddler age maybe 2 3 ish) down the isle. Mid way through the walk he ran Over to a family member (given this wasn’t like a whole tantrum it was like a cute “omg it’s grandma!” Type of waddle. Everyone at the wedding, bride groom, everyone was giggling about it. The boy gave a quick hug before the guest politely redirected the kid back to me so I could continue to hold his hand down to the altar. This kid was well behaved and super sweet, he never did anything else out of the ordinary besides that little treasure and after he finished giving the rings he went and did a cute little waddle to go sit with his people in the front row and I went to my respective place. ^w^ just thought I’d share some good stuff
A mate was getting married, his fiance”s cousin turned up with her b.f. she was wearing a bridle dress. His wife was upset as they had put something about only the bride wearing white (imagine having to tell people that?). My mate wanted the best man to sort it out but his wife to be was didn’t want to cause truble. Best man has a word with me, No probs. I go over to say hello etc, “trip”on the dress and spill half a pint of red wine down her dress. She screamed blue murder at me (I think she may have had a medical background) and left. One of the very few weddings I enjoyed attending.
I’ve gone to one wedding when I was like 5 or 6. I stood up to go restroom during the vows because if I didn’t go then I would go on myself. The bride(my aunt) glanced at me, stuttered in her vows for a moment as she tilted her head in question. I pointed in the direction of the bathroom, she pointed at her own kid while she continued on her vows and motioined for him to follow me. When I came back I tripped over my little heels, almost tore down a bannister if he hadnt caught me. My cousin got an extra piece of cake for saving the bannister and I got to take off my little heels a few hours early.
That last story was riveting. That one family completely destroyed a wedding, from start to finish… My heart goes out to the bride, and I really wished that someone else in the crowd, seeing the huge problem, could have stepped in on the bride and groom’s behalf to at least salvage some sense of a happy memory. Just pray that their marriage is one of the keepers, despite this unholy fiasco. And yeah, sue these idiots for all damages.
That last one. I lost it when the crazy mom finally went up to get her son after the wedding cake and table fell on him. And she had the audacity to accuse the bride and groom of hurting her kid! No lady, he did this to himself because you wouldn’t step up and stop him and his siblings the first time they acted up. I hope that bride gets not only the money for the damages, but also some for the embarrassment and emotional damage they suffered because of those little brats. I can remember being taken to a wedding when I was about 10 or 11. It was one of my mom’s cousins kids, I had no idea who any of these people were. I was totally bored, but sat still, because that’s what you do when your mom tells you to behave. At the reception I saw a lot of people filling up glasses out of what I thought was a fountain of lemonade. So I got a glass. Turns out it was a champagne fountain. I drank some it, thought it was sour and went to find my mom to tell her ‘Don’t drink the lemonade, it’s sour.” Luckily the cousin and the bride and groom thought it was funny. I was taken to the kitchen to get a soda and then one of the brides younger siblings took me out to the stable behind the house (they lived on a farm). I spent most of the rest of the reception petting the horses and ponies they had.
I had kids,at my wedding from new born to teenager and all were well behaved. We had the wedding and reception at a local oval and clubhouse in a small farming area. I bought a football (Aussie Rules) and a cricket set and the kids and adults played with both and had a great time. friends did get stroppy because they wanted their kids to eat with them and my mum said that they could either sit with the kids or have a table set aside for them and the kids,so thy left. All other parents were happy with that arrangement.
I had a family and very close friends only wedding, and of course family included kids, and it was great! Of course, I was able to do this because I trusted everybody to be parenting their kids appropriately. We had disposable cameras on the table, and the second youngest decided it was his job to take pictures, and it was honestly the most adorable thing ever. I would have felt like an important part of my family was missing if they weren’t there.
Our eldest was married 6 years ago. She had kids at the wedding and it was wonder. Everyone commented on how fun was the reception. Our second born is marrying in a few months and she will also have children at the wedding. She did exclude one family’s children because they are hellions, but should anyone get out of hand hubby and I will immediately handle it! I don’t tolerate rude, disrespectful or destructive people no matter how small.
I went to weddings as a kid as a preteen as a teenager and never even thought of behaving the way some of these people’s kids behave at weddings. I knew it was a solemn event and I knew that we were to be on our best behavior and all the kids at those weddings were on their best behavior. I don’t understand why kids these days have to wreck a party that’s not about them.
I was single mom for most of my kids lives… I can tell you right now neither of my kids would have even thought to behave this way especially at a wedding. My oldest was 4 when my sis got married and she was being loved on by everyone and had a great time. The wait staff took her in the back and gave her a apron and let her go around with them taking orders lol it was great fun for everyone! My youngest is a handful to me and me only. He is very polite and well behaved when he is out in the world. So if all else fails I feel like I at least did one thing right lol. I could never and I hope that bride won her case and that mom had to pay everything plus court costs back
I’ve gone to three weddings now with my daughter (she was 3 months, 10 months and 18 months old. So like, tiny.) You just accept that if you’re going to a wedding with your kid that you may have to miss out on stuff if your kid is crying or needs to get away. The wedding is not for you. It is for the bride and groom. Yeah it sucks that I missed part of the reception and had to leave early… But I chose to have kids and that’s the kind of sacrifice you have to make. I also had at least a dozen kids at my wedding and none of them caused any issues. People just need to deal with the fact that kids require sacrifice.
I saw a post where a girl was complaining that her only friend didn’t invited her bf to her wedding, but did invited a guy they haven’t seen in a year and her ex bf with his new gf, she was pissed that her friend didn’t think about how she was going to be alone and frustrated for not having someone with her, the bride explained that their friend would be there so she wouldn’t be alone, she also said that they were childhood friends so I assumed she knows her family. And the comments were crazy, girls said that the bride is horrible for not giving her a +1 and “why do brides think they are doing us a favor to invite us?” Or “the wedding is about the guests, the newlyweds should take care of the guests first” I didn’t believe that getting married would make you lost friendships but it does, I cannot believe how many people were mad about not giving a +1 to friends. I was even insulted because apparently if you are a bride you can’t invite who you want neither do what you want . That’s crazy
I was a teacher when I got married. Anyone who knows me will tell you my students were VERY important to me. I gave them love and affection like they were my own. So when it came to the invitations… I picked a select few I knew would behave themselves at the wedding. I didn’t invite any child I wasn’t close with their parents so I knew they wouldn’t act up. My day was amazing (minus my wedding topper being broken by my MIL) and all my students got to play with me and take pictures. It was great.
When my bf’s daughter (who I’d known for over 20 years by this time). Stepfather gave a speech afterwards. He mentioned meeting her when she was six and crying after school (he was the crossing guard) and he asked why she was upset. Her friend told him, “Because she misses her mommy.” So her mother arrives and he’s like, “I could see why she missed her so much!” He then went on to tell the guests about how much shrimp the bride had been capable of eating when she was nine. This young woman was a governor’s scholar who had maintained a 4.0 throughout HS and college. Without putting her name in the running, she was still elected Prom Queen. She made two trips to Guatemala to teach children there. (She’s a teacher still.) She is a talented dancer who choreographed the dances in her college musical. She is an absolutely all-around lovely, sweet human being, and her husband is a lucky guy. That stepfather ought to have been slapped. p.s. Great wedding tho, with kids. One infant threw up on my bf (before he changed into his wedding clothes!) but bf loves & understands babies.
My Mom was a florist and every week, she would make 2 – 3 very large, beautiful arrangements on wrought iron stands, for her church. Brides & grooms were told in advance that there would be flowers in the church, but for a small extra charge, they could choose the colour to match their wedding. This particular couple chose to do this & the flowers were arranged as requested. Now when I say ‘small fee’ it was exactly that, £10 for arrangements that would easily cost £25 – 30 each. At the end of the wedding, when almost everyone had left, my Mom went back into the church (she was in charge of security etc), to lock up, when the stragglers had left. However, she found, two women, struggling to carry 2 of the arrangements and stands, down the aisle. She asked what they were doing and they said that they ‘were taking the arrangements, that they’d paid for, to put them into the reception venue and then to give them as presents to the Bride and Groom’s Mothers!’ My Mom replied that they had only paid to choose the colour & the arrangements & stands belonged to the Church and most definitely not the Bride and Groom! One started to try to push passed my Mom, to no avail, while the other, started to cry and accuse my Mom, of stealing the flowers and destroying the wedding. Fortunately, at this point, the vicar hearing the commotion, came back into the church. He backed up, everything my Mom had said & told them that if they didn’t leave immediately, he would call the Police. At this, they started yelling ‘imagine how that will look, when we go to the newspapers & TV (this was before social media) & they make reports, showing how the Church & the Vicar, had ruined their wedding!
My brothers wedding: Some kid (probably 7 or 8 years old) knocked over the entire wedding cake before even the bride got to see it. My brother asked me to go get another cake… like where was I to find a wedding cake in under 20 minutes!? 😭 but per his request I left, I missed the whole ceremony and came back with a hideous tower of various flavors and colors of cake from a bakery. It got a good laugh but it was super sad because the original cake was so pretty. My wedding: I got married on the edge of the Grand Canyon, so being my worrisome self I made my wedding child free so I didn’t have some tot literally falling to their death on the day. When I told my family, my sister simply said “Well then I’m not coming”. I gave her a years notice and also offered to pay for a babysitter she just didn’t come. The rest of my family came even my brother from overseas, she couldn’t be bothered though 🤷🏼♀️ Having a child free wedding is so much more peaceful. I love kids but they sure can make things get chaotic really fast haha
2:26 Yeah that’s part of the reason why, but I’m gonna use my 10 years older sister’s wedding as an example for why it’s not always the case. I was 11 or 12 when she had her wedding and I took a article of the cake cutting that I somewhat recently refound and showed to my older sister. According to her my angle was basically the same as the photographer they highered and she really liked my article of it. You could hear her friends being funny, she liked the that I got a good shot of the back of her dress and might’ve even had the actual cutting better then the photographer. Their anniversary is comming up again in June and I plan to wish her a happy anniversary and send her it. Also sometimes the adults are a WAAAYY bigger hazard than the kids, like one of my older sister’s friends set my little sister’s dress of fire and burned it some by accident. We’re lucky it was a poofy dress or else my sister could’ve caught on fire herself and not just the dress. The person that put her on fire was also the one to put her out, using just her bare hands mind you, so everything worked out but still…
Oh my goodness the last story. Reminds me when I was working for a catering company and while I was catering a wedding at this beautiful venue with elk and water features on the property, a wedding guest literally changed her baby right there on the table with white linens during the reception. It never ceases to amaze me what people do.
When my brother got married, the ring bearer and flower girl were brother and sister and the children of his best friend/groomsmen. They stood up there really well and behave themselves. It was near the end of the ceremony, which was not long, when the little girl leaned forward looks down her brother and said “I am bored are you?” It was really cute and everyone in the room had a very good chuckle.
We tried to discreetly say that young kids were not invited by specifying just the parents. A family member of mine threw a fit about it, sent my aunt to fix it for her. This was a suggestion of my mother and photographer, mind you. This family member still brought her small kids, which one of them cried the whole ceremony, and my aunt was the one to take the kid out, missing most of the ceremony. It broke my heart. If you bring your kid, take care of your kid.
My brother got married in June and I’d had a few drinks by the time we got around to doin speeches and they were really startin to hit. I remember tryna listenin to my sister and his friend’s speech but after that, my memory got pretty spotty. My mom told me the next day she couldn’t believe I had stood up in front of everyone and gave a speech. I was like, oh no, what’d I say? Apparently, my speech was short but so good that I made my brother cry! I still wonder what I said to this day lmao. Idk why people weren’t recordin smh
I have a huge extended family with 25 cousins. As a kid, we were all invited to the many, many weddings. There was always 30 to 40 kids as even second cousins brought their kids! Never, ever did anything happen like what was described with the crotch goblins! A crying baby and spilled water, sure, but a tantrum would be taken elsewhere and the kid given an “attitude adjustment” out of ear shot. Honestly, what is wrong with these parents?
I was once at a wedding reception where a boy, about 3 or 4, sneezed green snot all over his hands (it was DRIPPING), then promptly ran up to the cake and stuck two green snot covered fingers all the way in it to the last knuckles. One of the bridesmaids started screaming at the mother, who was just letting him run wild. Nobody would eat the cake, it wasn’t a cheap-looking one either.
My cousin hired my sister in law as a babysitter for her wedding. My SIL was still in college and my cousin was paying her a decent amount for the occasion. She only had to babysit for the reception as majority of the kids were part of the ceremony. Kids had fun they had a little party and watched movies and fell asleep while the parents got to have a good time celebrating. It was great and my SIL said she would 100% do that again as it was easy money.
I went to a wedding in 2016, and I was 11. It was a Japanese wedding, so the reception was pretty uptight and scheduled- and I had to be taken out of the reception cuz I was abt to have a meltdown (I’m autistic) haha- Then a few years later, I went to another wedding (17 years of age by that point), and it was a genuine blast- like- the food was amazing, and the reception was so cool! I’m 18 now, and still remember those two events very fondly
for our engagement party, we wrote on the invitations ‘goodnight for the little ones!’ but we did tell our close family (uncles and aunts and such as) that they can bring their kids because we know and love their children, but for other people no thank you, I’m not tryna babysit your children.. funny enough, the older people were more of a problem than the children lol, they outright STEPPED on the STAGE during the photoshoot and grabbed some of the GIVEAWAY candy and scented stuff (that me and my dad organized before-hand) we were trying to get a good shot of all the goodies with us but some people are so entitled I swear.. one of my older cousins (dad’s family side, they’re crazy) she didnt just peer pressure my mom into giving her the chocolate to hand out, there were also MULTIPLE photos of her handing the chocolate to her children and mom (RIGHT BEHIND US IN THE AISLE LET ME ADD) like I kid you not she was in every shot in the aisle walk, and do you wanna know why I’m upset about her giving the chocolate to the kids and her mom??? the giveaway stuff was supposed to be for AFTER, after the photoshoot, after everyone’s eaten, there was only a limited number of stuff and she gave it all to her close family, even my mom and my mom in-law didnt get any, heck me and my husband didnt get any.. hopefully in the second party my parents dont get peer pressured into inviting them… literally her mom and some of my other aunts came in house-clothes, like traditional loungewear, that is NOT how you dress up for an engagement party