Who To Invite To Wedding Shower Etiquette?

In a wedding shower, it is essential to invite both sides of the family and both sets of family friends. The wedding party should be invited as well, as well as best friends, coworkers, distant relatives, and anyone not invited to the wedding. The bridal party should include bridesmaids, including the Maid of Honor, and out-of-town guests.

Bridal shower etiquette involves inviting everyone from close family friends, relatives, and couples friends. For destination weddings, it is possible to have a shower with people who are not attending the wedding, but stick with a group of people who are close to the couple. Engagement can be challenging when considering inviting families from both sides.

Inviting close family and friends is crucial, but not obligated. The bridal party, including the maid of honor and bridesmaids, should make the top guest list, followed by immediate family members from both sides of the aisle. If the bride welcomes children, guests may include nieces, the flower girl, and junior bridesmaids.

The party host is responsible for sending the wedding shower invitations, but it is important to ask the couple to approve the guest list before sending them. Close family and friends should also be invited, but not feel obligated to invite significant others or friends.

For a traditional bridal shower, women from both sides of each family should be invited. If the groom’s mother is helping with the wedding, a maid or matron of honor should be the host. A good rule of thumb is to invite the groom’s closest female relatives and friends of the family.

What is proper etiquette for bridal shower invitations?

A general rule of thumb when organizing a bridal shower is to make sure the invitations are sent out at least six to eight weeks before the date of the event. If there are guests coming from out of town, you can give them extra time to make travel arrangements by sending your invitations a couple of weeks earlier. If you have a date in mind but havent planned the other details yet, you may want to consider sending bridal shower save the dates. That way, guests can mark it in their calendar while waiting for the official invitation to follow.

As for when to host a bridal shower, it really depends on the date of the wedding. However, its recommended that the bridal shower take place anywhere from two weeks to two months before the wedding itself so that it doesnt interfere too much with the couples wedding planning and other events. If you have a lot of guests coming from far away, take their travel plans into consideration as much as possible.

When sending out bridal shower invitations, make sure to include a specific deadline on when the guests should RSVP by. That way, you can plan accordingly when it comes to choosing a venue, organizing refreshments, and more.

Who should be invited to the wedding shower?

Close Family. If youre having one wedding shower, both sides of the family and both sets of family friends should be invited. However, if youre having multiple bridal showers, you can invite the side of the family and family friends from that side only-or have a mix of both sides, depending on locations.

Planning your wedding shower and not sure who to invite? Explore our guide to find out who should attend and those you can potentially skip.

You probably have a good idea of who you’ll invite to your wedding day or bachelorette party. However, that’s not the only event that comes along on the wedding planning journey. If you plan to have a bridal shower or couple’s shower, youll also need a guest list for that.

Fortunately, showers are typically much smaller than wedding ceremonies and receptions—and there’s a lot more flexibility when it comes to who to invite. Here, we break down all the common questions around who to invite to your wedding shower.

Is it rude to invite someone to a wedding shower but not the wedding?

Dont Invite Anyone to the Bridal Shower If Theyre Not Also Invited to the Wedding. This may seem obvious, but inviting people to the bridal shower if they are not invited to the wedding is inappropriate. It will likely offend them, and it looks very much so like youre pandering for gifts. The only exception is an office shower, where coworkers want to impart good wishes to the betrothed, but that would be hosted by an entirely different group of people.

Keep It Intimate. When it comes to inviting friends, it may be hard to narrow down your list, but the shower really is for your nearest and dearest. Of course, invite your wedding party and close family and friends. Do not feel obligated to invite significant others or friends of your relatives unless you truly have a close relationship with them. A shower should be a healthy mix of family and friends who know you best. After all, how else will they be able to win all those fun shower games?

The Host Ultimately Decides the Number of Guests. Its up to the host to decide how many guests they feel comfortable having in attendance. The host and the bride should sit down to discuss the number of guests they feel comfortable having, both based on size constraints and the overall budget. If the betrotheds list exceeds that number, consider having more than one shower (perhaps one for friends and one for family), but the host should not be asked to go over the guest count.

Who should not host a bridal shower?

Traditional etiquette dictates that the maid of honor—not the mother of the bride—should host the shower. Nancy is a freelance writer for MarthaStewart.com. Some etiquette rules were meant to fade away into oblivion, like the one about family members of the bride not hosting her bridal shower.

Traditional etiquette dictates that the maid of honor—not the mother of the bride—should host the shower.

Some etiquette rules were meant to fade away into oblivion, like the one about family members of the bride not hosting her bridal shower. Thats right: Every shower youve attended that was hosted by the mother of the bride actually broke with traditional etiquette—who knew? The concern with having a familial host was that, since the party is all about people bringing, or showering, the bride with gifts, it was considered tacky for her family to be asking for presents.

In modern times, however, many people other than the maid of honor have taken on the role of bridal party host. And were here to tell you theres nothing tacky about loved ones hosting a shower. Anyone whos close to the bride, including her mother, sister, aunt, cousin, even her grandma, can host. Here, we explore the choices.

Who to invite to a bridal shower vs bachelorette party?

When it comes to bridal shower vs. bachelorette party, each event can have its own guest list. While theyre both pre-wedding events, one often feels much more focused on close female friends of the bride while the other is more open to friends and relatives.

A bachelorette party typically has a smaller guest list than a bridal shower, which includes the maid of honor, bridesmaids, and close friends. You might invite your mom and mother-in-law too — especially if youre hosting a relaxing retreat or daytime activity for your bachelorette party.

With a bridal shower, you often invite close family members as well as your wider friend group. While bridal showers are traditionally for female relatives and friends, theres no reason why you need to keep your guest list exclusive to one gender. You might decide to invite the whole wedding party, or host a wedding shower with friends and loved ones that both you and your fiance want to attend.

Whether you opt for a small or large guest list, ask your host to consider sending online invitations. Not only does this save time, but it also means theres more room in the budget to spend on incredible experiences, decor, and food. Plus, there are hundreds of bridal shower invitations and bachelorette party invitations that you can customize to your hearts content.

Do you invite your mother-in-law to a bridal shower?

When Should the Bridal Shower Be Held?. There is not an absolute right time for the shower to be held however, as a general rule they should be planed sometime within one to three months of the wedding but can happen up to a couple of weeks before if needed. Its also pretty common today that brides have more than one shower for various reasons. Hosts of the different showers should be sure to consult each other on dates and guest lists so there isnt any overlap. It is common for Bridesmaids, mom and mother-in-laws to be invited to all showers.

Where Should the Bridal Shower be Held?. Bridal showers can really be held anywhere from someones house (usually the hosts) to a restaurant, park, or other venue. It can even be a destination event if it makes sense for the budgets of those attending. No matter what location is chosen, it is most important to consider the costs to those attending so that no one has to miss this special time simply because they cant afford it.

Who Should Be Invited and When to Invite Them. Invitations should be ready and mailed out 4-6 weeks before the bridal shower. While I always recommend sending a physical invitation via snail mail, if there are guests that will need to travel, sending electronic save the dates is totally acceptable.

Can you invite people who are not invited to the wedding to the bridal shower?

Amy talks bridal shower guest list etiquette in this recent interview with BRIDES.

The article says answers the question “Who to invite to the Bridal Shower”:

The short answer is, you should not invite anyone to your shower who will not be invited to the wedding. Your shower is an intimate gathering of some of the closest women (and men if you choose) in your life, and if anyone makes the cut for your shower, they should also be close enough to you to get a wedding invite.

“Youre basically telling your guests that you like them enough to have them celebrate you (and buy you gifts) but not enough to include them on one of the most important days of your life,” says Amy Nichols, owner of Amy Nichols Special Events. “Anyone who is invited or included in the bridal showershould be invited to the wedding.”

Who do you send bridal shower invites to?

Who should get an invitation?. Before sending the invites, request a guest list from the bride. Then send out an invite to everyone on it-even if they helped plan the event. Since a bridal shower is an intimate celebration with the brides nearest and dearest, everyone invited should also be attending the ceremony and reception.

What should you include in the invitations?. A bridal shower invitation should include the basics, like date, time, location, dress code, and RSVP information. Many bridal showers involve a gift exchange, so consider putting wedding registry information on the invite as well. If you feel its necessary, remind guests that a bridal shower is a family-friendly event; anything overtly raunchy can be reserved for the bachelorette party.

Who typically pays for a bridal shower?

Who Pays for the Bridal Shower?. In short, the host is the one who pays for the bridal shower—or at least some of it. Most commonly, this is the maid of honor, but the couples relatives, friends or even the to-be-weds themselves can all pitch in to cover the cost of the wedding shower.

In that situation, my recommendation for cutting back on conflict is to put one person in charge of collecting the money and then designating that person or another person to make the purchases, says Swann, who is a nationally recognized expert on social etiquette and lifestyle practices. That way, theres a very clear line of communication in terms of who is contributing what. Just be sure to clearly outline how much youre expecting from everyone involved so theres no confusion or hurt feelings down the line.

Keep in mind that the bridal shower cost is an added expense that might not be feasible for some people, especially for anyone whos also in the wedding party or contributing financially toward the actual wedding. If people arent able to contribute financially, it doesnt mean that they arent interested in helping organize the party in other ways. There are plenty of other non-financial ways to contribute, including sending out invitations, setting up the food, decorating the space and cleaning up, says Swann.

Is it okay for the mother of bride to host a bridal shower?

The maid of honor isnt the only option, however. Anyone who is close to the bride—including her mother, sister, cousin, grandma, or future mother-in-law—can host.

It used to be that immediate family members were never named as official hosts. Since a shower is all about asking people to bring gifts, it was thought to be gauche if a brides family were essentially bidding for presents. But if they were secretly hosting, meaning they did the planning and the paying, their identities werent revealed–and the bridal party was usually called upon to fake being the hosts. Now, though, its fine for Mom or a sister to plan and host the event.

How to Ask Someone to Host a Bridal Shower. What should a bride do if no one has offered to host a shower? Even though you know no one is obligated to give you one, youre disappointed (and it may especially hurt if youve thrown showers for other people).

First, consider that there may be a surprise shower in the wings. But if youre sure thats not the case and, as time goes on and still no word or sign, youve got to be brave and ask your maid of honor to throw you one. If shes hesitant because its a money issue and the bridesmaids are strapped for cash, ask your mom or mother-in-law if they are willing to host a shower for you. (You may have to explain the modern etiquette of mom-as-host to them.)

Should the groom’s family be invited to a bridal shower?

Who Makes Up the Majority of the Guests?. A bridal shower guest list will be mostly the brides closest friends, bridal party, and family. If the grooms mom is helping with the organizing, she may ask to invite the grooms sisters and aunties, so you can count on including the grooms close family too.

Should I Invite the Grooms Close Girlfriends?. If youre also close with the grooms female friends, its customary to include them.

Is the Groom Invited to the Bridal Shower?. Traditionally, showers are meant to be a party for the ladies only. However, its become quite common for the groom show up at the end of a shower and make an appearance. Many grooms dont love this attention though, so its definitely something to discuss openly as a couple.