How An Affair Saved My Marriage?

Infidelity is often considered the ultimate betrayal of trust, and it can be hurtful and damaging. After discovering a partner’s affair, the immediate response is usually a combination of disbelief, anger, and depression. People in happy marriages don’t have affairs, but long, slow disconnection can cause a breakdown in the marriage.

To rebuild trust after an affair, the cheating partner must cut off all contact with the other party, the person with whom they had the affair. Both partners—the one who is unfaithful and the one who is cheating—will be open to reconciliation, therapy, and for the cheater to prove themselves. Learning how to save a marriage after infidelity is a long process, and it is important to remember that it hurts, it’s not easy, and it will take time to heal. It will take a decision to trust again and the cheater taking responsibility and not blaming their spouse for the affair.

In the aftermath of an affair, only the couple can decide if their marriage can survive. An apology without excuses and a process of forgiveness are crucial to rebuilding a marriage. To prove that your relationship is worth saving, reconnect with your spouse in a meaningful way. Married women of all ages and backgrounds are cheating, and Cortney Warren believes that relationships can recover and thrive after an affair if both parties are committed to the transformation process.

In summary, infidelity can be a devastating event that can lead to a new lease on life for a marriage. It requires patience, understanding, and commitment from both partners to rebuild their relationship and maintain their love for each other.


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Do most cheaters regret cheating?

The survey found that having a great marriage did not make people more likely to regret having an affair. People who had affairs said they were very happy with them and did not regret having them. The results show that infidelity isn’t always caused by a deeper problem in a relationship. People had affairs for new and exciting sex or because they didn’t feel committed to their partners, not because they needed emotional fulfillment. People cheat for different reasons, Selterman said. Sometimes they cheat even if their relationships are good. There is no solid evidence that people who have affairs have lower relationship quality or life satisfaction. Selterman plans to study other groups of cheaters to learn more about them.

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What not to do after an affair?

The Seven Deadly Sins: Don’t tell your family and friends about your affair. … Blast your partner on social media. … Make big decisions. … Blame the other affair partner. … Think about the other affair partner. … Blame yourself. … Think you can recover alone. How do you react when something bad happens? You just act on whatever feels good. When you find out your partner has cheated, you might feel many different things. But in the days and weeks after, some reactions make it harder to heal. This applies whether you stay together or separate. Don’t do these things after discovering your partner had an affair. Take our advice. We see this happen a lot and it never helps.

The 7 Deadly Sins: Don’t do these things after an affair. Tell your family and friends. After discovering the affair, you may want to talk to others about it. But your relationship is unclear. There’s no clear answer on whether to stay together, break up, hate each other, or love each other. If there’s a chance of fixing this, make the best decisions now to help the healing process. Imagine six months to a year from now: your friends and family hate you. This makes it harder to reconcile.

Do men feel guilty after cheating?

About 25% of Americans have an affair at some point in their lives. Most men who have an affair feel guilty. Even if they don’t admit it, most cheating husbands feel guilty. You may notice changes in your spouse’s behavior that make you wonder if they’re cheating. Men are more likely to feel guilt over sexual affairs than emotional affairs. Men think sexual fidelity is more important than emotional fidelity. Your husband may be feeling guilty after cheating or an affair. These are the signs.

Can you fall back in love after affair?

If you’re struggling to recover from an affair, know that you can move past this and come out stronger than ever. It will take time and effort, but you can rekindle the love and passion you once had.

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Can extramarital affairs last a lifetime?

You are having an intense sexual and emotional relationship. Sometimes extramarital affairs lead to marriage. Sometimes they are short-lived relationships. Some affairs last a lifetime. CBS correspondent Charles Kuralt had a 30-year romance that was exposed after he died.

Many people have affairs that change their lives. They use similar words to describe the passion, betrayal, and pain. No one ever made me feel like that before. I wanted to die. If I had to choose one person to live with on a deserted island, it would be him. Or her.

Therapists and people who have been hurt by affairs say that we should talk more openly about affairs. They believe that only honesty will help people understand and avoid the pain that affairs can cause.

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Can an affair fix a relationship?

If the affair is kept secret, we work with the person, not their partner. Sometimes someone comes to therapy because they feel guilty about having an affair but feel happier now there’s an extra person in their life. The new person can fulfill their fantasy side of life and explore new ways of thinking and feeling. Having an affair can make them more committed to their relationship because they’re not lacking excitement and don’t feel like they’re missing out on anything. An affair can keep a relationship intact if the partner doesn’t know. Therapists don’t judge relationships. We help couples and individuals figure out what they want.

Couples can work through issues in therapy together. But if the affair is a sign of bigger problems in the relationship, couples counseling can help the couple work through their feelings about ending the marriage. Sometimes an affair is the exit card a partner wanted to play but was afraid of. An affair can sometimes end a bad relationship. Contact our team for relationship support. Call 020 8673 4545 or email to book a session with one of our couples counsellors. Karen Dempsey has 20 years’ experience in publishing and has worked as a journalist, editor and copywriter. She is a qualified psychotherapist with an MA/diploma in transpersonal counseling.

Do people regret extramarital affairs?

The survey found that having a great marriage did not make people more likely to regret having an affair. People who had affairs said they were very happy with them and did not regret having them. The results show that infidelity isn’t always caused by a deeper problem in a relationship. People had affairs for new and exciting sex or because they didn’t feel committed to their partners, not because they needed emotional fulfillment. People cheat for different reasons, Selterman said. Sometimes they cheat even if their relationships are good. There is no solid evidence that people who have affairs have lower relationship quality or life satisfaction.

Can cheating save a marriage
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What are the odds of saving a marriage after an affair?

FAQ How often do people cheat in marriage? About half of people in monogamous relationships admit to having an affair. About 25% of marriages survive an affair. More men stay married when they are the cheater (61% vs. 44%). Should I admit my affair or keep it secret to save my marriage? Be honest and come clean. This is also true in statistics. If you don’t admit your mistake, your divorce rate is 80%. If you admit your mistake, the divorce rate is about half as high.

Honesty makes relationships stronger, builds trust, and allows healing.

Can an affair save a marriage?

Some therapists believe affairs can save marriages. Understanding how an affair happened can help couples find answers to their questions. This is not about blaming anyone. It’s about understanding what caused the infidelity so the couple can decide how to move forward. Esther Perel, author of Mating in Captivity, lectures around the world on love and sex. She asked her audiences if anyone had ever had an affair. Usually, no hands went up. But when she asked, “How many of you have been affected by infidelity?” many hands went up.

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How I saved my marriage after an affair?

The unfaithful partner must rebuild trust. End the affair. Answer questions. … Be honest. Apologize. Show your emotions, but in a positive way. … Ask questions, but don’t overdo it. Keep track of what helps. … Think about what needs to change in the marriage. People feel devastated when they find out their spouse has been unfaithful. Some marriages end right away. But many couples hit roadblocks as they try to move past anger, sadness, and mistrust. Over half of all marriages survive an affair. These hurtful interactions cause emotional problems for both spouses, and neither one knows how to help the marriage recover. Many couples who love each other decide to divorce. The good news is that you can move on from the pain, forgive and reconnect with your spouse.


📹 I Had an Affair, Can I Save My Marriage? | 3 Tips on Restoring a Broken Marriage | Dr. Doug Weiss

In this video, Dr. Doug Weiss, licensed psychologist and speaker that has helped thousands of marriages heal after infidelity, …


How An Affair Saved My Marriage
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Christina Kohler

As an enthusiastic wedding planner, my goal is to furnish couples with indelible recollections of their momentous occasion. After more than ten years of experience in the field, I ensure that each wedding I coordinate is unique and characterized by my meticulous attention to detail, creativity, and a personal touch. I delight in materializing aspirations, guaranteeing that every occasion is as singular and enchanted as the love narrative it commemorates. Together, we can transform your wedding day into an unforgettable occasion that you will always remember fondly.

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  • The one who was hurt should realize that you can never trust that person again. You’re not a warden and you shouldn’t have to look over your shoulder every time a trigger happens. The other person chose to cheat, not you. Go and work on any possible codependent issues you may have. Get your life back and chose a new course.

  • My husband has had multiple affairs over our 40 years of marriage and it wasn’t until recently I came across your website and watched your articles that I came to the knowledge that I no longer have to carry the guilt that he put on me for his bad choices. Thanks Dr Weiss for that revelation because the weight of this guilt was destroying me! My husband to this day keeps saying that it takes “two to tango”, he is still not getting it!