The Bible explicitly states that there should be no sexual intercourse prior to marriage, and even if a man and a woman are engaged to be married, it is sin for them to have premarital sex. Sex is a gift from God meant for a married couple to enjoy, and it is not appropriate to have sex in any form before marriage. Premarital sex, also known as fornication, is considered a sin and is often referred to as such.
The Bible takes this stance because it upholds the sacredness of sex and reveres the ones partaking in it. Living together before marriage creates more temptation to sin, hardening us against repentance and plundering the trust in the relationship. The Western concept of dating is haram before marriage, which includes hugging, kissing, hand-holding, and sex.
Fornication is an outright sin, and it is considered a mortal sin if done with the full knowledge that it is against the will of God. The Bible regards marriage as a sacred institution that should be honored, and any sexual immorality, whether it is adultery or sex before marriage, is a grave sin of the flesh.
The Bible promotes complete abstinence before marriage, and sex between a husband and his wife is the only form of sexual relations of which God approves. Most Christians would classify premarital sex under the seventh commandment, “Thou shall not commit adultery,” but adultery is defined as:
In conclusion, premarital sex is considered a sin unless the two of you are married. The Bible’s condemnation of “fornication” or “sexual immorality” includes sex before marriage, emphasizing the importance of abstinence and the sacredness of sex.
📹 12 Reasons Not to Have Sex Before Marriage
Why is sex before marriage bad? Why is premarital sex a sin? What does the Bible say about having sex before marriage?
What does the Bible say about nudity?
17 You must not look at a woman or her daughter naked. You must not take her son’s daughter or her daughter’s daughter to look at her naked. They are her close relatives. It is wrong.
Is it wrong to be intimate before marriage?
It’s up to you whether to have sex before or after marriage. There’s no right or wrong answer. Don’t feel pressured into making a decision that makes you uncomfortable.
What are the benefits of having sex before marriage?; Are there any negative consequences of having sex before marriage?; Questions to ask before marriage about sex. Physical intimacy is important for all people, and sex is an important part of a romantic relationship. People’s views on sex outside of marriage are often influenced by culture, religion, faith, and spirituality.
Is cuddling before marriage a sin?
It’s not sinful, but it’s unwise. God says sex before marriage is sinful, not kissing or cuddling. We are wired to desire sex, and kissing and cuddling triggers that desire.
Is it unholy to kiss before marriage?
The Bible doesn’t say that romantic kissing is a sin. Many Christians believe that kissing is not a sin, but it can become sinful if it leads to more intimate or sexual acts before marriage. You and your partner can decide if kissing is okay through prayer and discussion. The Bible takes a strong stance on purity, but it doesn’t specifically call out kissing as a sin. Instead, it frowns upon any act that can lead to sex before marriage. Kissing your partner is not a sin, but having sex before marriage is. Cuddling, snuggling, and holding hands are fine as long as they don’t progress to anything more.
Colossians 3:5: “Put to death the sinful things in you.” Don’t have sex outside of marriage. Don’t be greedy. A greedy person is an idolater. Worship the things of this world. Treat older women as you would your mother. Treat younger women with purity as you would your own sisters. Note: Many Bible verses show kissing as a friendly greeting. For example, in Ruth 1:14, Orpah kisses her mother-in-law. They cried and Orpah kissed her mother-in-law goodbye. But Ruth held on to Naomi.
What to do if a girl is pregnant before marriage?
As a father, you have 6 options when your girlfriend is pregnant. Help Parent – Take responsibility for your actions and support both mother and child. … Get married and raise the child together. Temporary Foster Care Adopt the baby. Abandon mother and child. Abortion – I’m 17 and pregnant. What should I do? I’m 17 and a senior. My girlfriend thinks she’s pregnant. She hasn’t taken a test yet, but she’s late for her period and plans to take one this week. What if she’s pregnant? Help me! Hearing your girlfriend is pregnant can be shocking. The first reaction is often disbelief. Maybe you don’t believe this is real. You need to find out if she’s pregnant. We offer free tests here at the Pregnancy Resource Clinic. She can come in for a test to make sure she is pregnant. You can come with her if you want.
Is kiss fornication?
In many religions, fornication is sexual activity between unmarried people. Kissing on the lips is not fornication because it doesn’t involve sex.
Is giving birth before marriage a sin?
Rev. Diana Nkesiga, the vicar of All Saints Cathedral, thinks it’s wise for Christians in this situation to step down from leadership. However, she says that being pregnant is not a sin. If we think this way, we can make the child feel bad. “The sin is having sex and getting pregnant. If you repent, you can still come to Communion.” However, she says many Christians don’t listen and judge too quickly. Some girls are raped, and some act out from home frustrations. Fr. Dennis Wamala of Gaba Catholic Church says these incidents are rare at his church, so it would be hard to ask a devotee about a pregnancy. Even if the unwed mother is a choir member, it is usually up to her to step aside. “You can keep coming to church and no one will mind,” she adds.
Is it a sin to touch your private parts?
Conclusion: Touching yourself in a sexual manner is a sin. Touching yourself sexually is a sin in Catholic teachings. It is wrong to touch yourself sexually. It is against the sanctity of our bodies, involves intention and consent, defiles marriage, and can lead to addiction. The Church also says that we can ask God for forgiveness. Through confession, repentance, and commitment to holiness, we can find healing, restoration, and the grace to resist temptation.
May we all live in purity and glorify God.
Is it a sin to have a tattoo?
It depends. Some Christians believe it is a sin. Most Christians refer to Leviticus 19:28, which says, “You shall not make any cuts in your flesh for the dead, nor tattoo any marks on you.” I am the Lord. Why is this verse in the Bible? God wants His people to be different from other religions. This verse is about pagan rituals. Does this verse apply to us today? Yes! People getting tattoos should think about why they’re getting them and what they mean. Is the tattoo a sign of witchcraft, idolatry, or paganism? If so, Christians should reconsider… I think Leviticus 19 doesn’t forbid all tattoos. In the US, tattoos have become more socially acceptable in the last 20 years. A recent study by Pew Research says about 40% of Millennials have tattoos. It’s no longer just the outcasts or sailors with tattoos. Suburban moms, doctors, attorneys, entertainers, and even pastors can be found with tattoos.
Is exploring your body a sin?
Exploring your body is a sin. Your body is a temple. The Bible says our bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit (1 Corinthians 6:19). We should respect our bodies because they are God’s temple. Self-exploration can defile this sacred temple. It often involves impure thoughts, fantasies, or actions. The Bible says that sex outside of marriage is wrong. Romans 1:26-27 also talks about sexual immorality. It says that people exchange natural sexual relations for unnatural ones. These verses say that exploring your body in ways that go against God’s plan for human sexuality is against God’s will. As Christians, we should try to be holy and honor God with our bodies.
Marriage is sacred. God views marriage as sacred and a lifelong commitment between a man and a woman (Matthew 19:4-6). Self-exploration outside marriage devalues marriage. Hebrews 13:4 says that marriage is sacred and that sexual immorality is wrong. God will judge those who are sexually immoral or adulterous.
Is it a sin to make out with your girlfriend?
Anytime you get physical with someone, you create strong ties and bonds. Having a sexual drive is not bad. Making out is not a sin, but it can be sinful. A man’s job in a relationship is to honor God and the woman he is dating. Think about why you want to make out. You want to honor your body.If you’re making out just to please someone, you may not be honoring your body. For many guys, making out is confusing because of physical ramifications. It’s best to avoid this. Discover why you’re choosing to make out. You don’t need physical validation or connection in a dating relationship. “Your goal in dating is to honor the other person well.” -JD Rodgers.
Is making out a sin?
Anytime you get physical with someone, you create strong ties and bonds. Having a sexual drive is not bad. Making out is not a sin, but it can be sinful. A man’s job in a relationship is to honor God and the woman he is dating. Think about why you want to make out. You want to honor your body.If you’re making out just to please someone, you may not be honoring your body. For many guys, making out is confusing because of physical ramifications. It’s best to avoid this. Discover why you’re choosing to make out. You don’t need physical validation or connection in a dating relationship. “Your goal in dating is to honor the other person well.” -JD Rodgers.
📹 How To Be Physically Intimate In Dating Without Sinning
Elizabeth gets into the details of how to be physically intimate in a dating relationship without sinning. She proposes a refreshing …
It’s so difficult to resist temptation. Sometimes I feel like without thinking I isolate myself from others because they judge me because I don’t do normal stuff like partying, drinking, smoking or having sex. I had to lie to my sister that I had sex because she was worried about me. She even thought I was a lesbian because I don’t have a partner. My family has a different opinion on sex before marriage and it makes me sad. I just want to wait because I know God will find a person who fears and put him first. I know he will. Being a Christian is getting so difficult. My dad introduced me to God but now he doesn’t want anything to do with him. It’s so difficult to have morals when people tell you a different thing. Please pray for me so that I don’t lose faith.
I have had premarital sex and everything this brother says is true! I was with a girl who I wanted to marry and she wanted to marry me, but after we have in and had premarital sex our relationship went down hill and introduced other problems. It made me more needy of her and drove her away. We also, lost respect for each other. I hope God heals me so I can have a real fruitful relationship. Guys and girls who are virgins or have decided to become abstinent whatever you do, do not give in if you want to save love, it is something made for the union of a husband and wife. The sad thing is you dont know what you have lost until you have lost it, like the fall of Adam and Eve in the garden of eden
I agree completely. God makes our bodies ready for sex and childbearing in our teens. Our culture often asks us to wait for many years while we get our career going to get married. This long period of abstinence can lead us to engaging in premarital sex simply because the sexual instinct is so hard to suppress. I think our culture should change to prepare us for marriage much earlier in life so that premarital sexual temptation is not so difficult to endure.
Real love is self-sacrificing. You want the highest good for the other person and it develops through the practice of the virtue of chastity. You’re willing to get to know the other person and love them for their own sake not for how they may make you feel. The initial passion that happens when you fall in love is great but it resides on the emotional and sensual plane. To go deeper, there must be a permanent commitment between two people in such a way that it reflects how God loves us in a permanent, exclusive, committed and fruitful way. When you practice chastity, respect for self and the other grows. I really wish more people understood that.
Wow. I was recently asked (in a Christian capacity) why not to have sex before marriage and I couldn’t come up with a coherent answer. I was prepared to sit down for the next few hours until I found the best explanation. This is the second article I’ve watched and I don’t think I need to keep looking. Excellent article, I am sharing this one. Thank you!!!
Thank you for sharing this vid! I am 30 years old and I will abstain from sex and foreplay until I am married. Unfortunately, I am not a virgin, but I lifted up my past to God and asked him for forgiveness. I am now in my second virginity. When I meet my future husband we will not be having sex until we married! I will also not love with him until we are married for obvious reasons.
Could you do a series for teenagers?, Around 17-19 yrs old about dating and stuff and if one (as a teen) really means when he says he wants marriage. Maybe like a series on everything you talk about but talking to the youth because I’m going through stuff like this and it would be cool if you could talk to the youth
It’s definitely hard… I know what it is I want long-term and I know that I want to be as faithful as I can to God and my partner. The mistakes or sins that I’ve put myself through have made me feel uncomfortable the older I’ve gotten, but the temptation is still there… for the longest time, I’ve been trying to find ways to wage my sins or mistakes by twisting what I know is wrong with logic that I know is from my own selfish nature… I corrupted myself in more ways than one when I first entered my 20’s. Now I need God’s support and strength more than ever so that I can fully experience what He wants for me. ❤
Hearing this article has helped me so much. I am waiting till marriage and I am with a guy who I thought loved me and honored me but thia morning through a text he basically gave me an ultimatum and that he feels disconnected in the relationship because there is no sex amd that if I don’t give myself to him this weekend he will have to end things.
Thank you so much for explaining this the way you did In a way we can understand it. I know there is all kinds of terrible judgments in the Bible about sexual immorality, but I had no idea that it did all the other things you just mentioned. For the first time in my life I’m with a real Christian woman who won’t have sex before marriage. I thank God for her because I have prayed every day for years to find a woman like her. SHE IS SOOOOO worth the wait. If we honor God 1st he will bless our marriage. THANK YOU FOR THIS MESSAGE
#5 and #6 aka Soul Ties. The reason why you leave a toxic relationship but cant stay away or cant stop thinking of them😪. Most BAD soulties (some r good, like positive fam/friends) are made via sex but are also made by bonding/opening up to another person. Can be good or bad depending on the person. Easy way to get over a breakup is to break soulties with your ex and STAY AWAY from them. Their Demons r transferred from them to u and now u have insecurities,anxiety,jealousy and u cant figure out why🤔And like Mark said, it can all be avoided by staying sexfree and asking God for help to defeat spirit of Lust, believers should be fighting those spirits and temptations with scriptures and praying. Nice article bro
There are exceptions to your theory. I was a virgin until age 27 and wanted to try sex. I did learn that sex without love was “bankrupt”, but slept with a couple of partners in close relationships on occasion. My wife of 25 years was previously married to a bad man that beat her, and cheated on her. We met and lived together for 2 years before getting married. We have been happy, and trusting during our 27 years together, and could not imagine being apart. We both grew up as Catholic, and that sex was a somewhat dirty topic. We do believe that sex is a gift from God to be enjoyed between 2 committed people that love each other….
This has been a burden on me for a little over two years when I started dating my love. I fell in love with this beautiful girl and she did the same for me. I didn’t want to wait for marriage and threw my virginity away to her as she did to me. Everyday I feel guilty for doing this, as it’s a binding of marriage, and I really want to marry this woman. I’m just so confused and never want to lose this wondeeful woman in my life. I’m crying as I type this cause I don’t know if she’ll leave me because of this changes I want to have. This is by far, the biggest sin I have struggled with and have no idea what to do. I want to chase God and at the same time, marry this woman. I feel like I did it the wrong way. 💔
I just discovered my cousin is having sex before marriage and in lust is looking forward to be married as early as possible just so they could have sex. it breaks my heart. She is a Christian. I was so shocked. 😥 I thought his boyfriend was good. i was so wrong. He did not protect her purity and has no self control.
My fiancé and I fell into sexual sin for pretty much 2 straight months. We tried to hold off, then we did oral, then further and further. I felt superficially confident for a moment when she wanted to be with me that way, and I thought it helped my relationship anxiety. Now we’re pregnant from the one time we took the condom off, we don’t have much money, she doesn’t want to be with me anymore, but she’s going to stay because of the baby. I don’t think she would’ve stayed if the baby wasn’t coming. I had given up porn during that entire dating season, and when I decided to give up on sex with her I went back to porn to keep me sane. I started perusal porn daily at 9. When I don’t have sexual releases or watch porn I get angry at everything, I feel permanently addicted. I wanted to marry her quickly to do it God’s way, but my parents were rude about it and wanted me to wait at least a year or two of dating first. I can’t do that, they don’t understand. If only we had gotten married right away like we wanted to, instead my parents shamed me for something good and now I’m in sin.
I have had failed relationship after failed relationship because of this and has brought me nothing but pain. I really didn’t realize pre-marital sex was such a toxic and terrible sin, I’m convinced this is why you see the same people on dating sites year after year, I have realized what a sinner I was after finding Jesus Christ and starting reading the Bible.
This topic is always shared by married people. Yes it’s according to scriptures but what a married person knows about a single person’s life? The endless loneliness, unfulfilled desires years after years? And when you are a middle aged lady it’s particularly tough to listen to this from a married man.
A lesson thats sorely lacking in society today. Many would do good to look within and practice some self discipline and self control. Stop letting the body control your actions. Who is in contol, the flesh or you? If its the flesh you better reign that in and hard because it will only ever lead you to problems and destruction.
One thing I don’t like about couples rushing into marriages is sometimes in order to have sex faster. I am unsure what to do atm. Me and my boyfriend are serious together, we are planning to get married in the future but we are not married yet because of financial reasons(other people’s reason is their parents not accepting them as a couple), I don’t want to rush into marriage and make it unspecial, we really do feel married in our hearts already in front of God since God is Omnipresent. What even is Marriage according to the Bible? Public announcement? or private ceremony between the couple and God to join them together? People say that they don’t take marriage seriously, but I think people just don’t take the COMMITMENT seriously, even when they are married. Why does it matter if we marry later or now I wonder? God still knows if the two are serious or not.
What if its not actual sex its just like rubbing but their is that good feeling in the end and its happenings before sex because I’m trying to get outta that situation right now and I’m trying to determine whether i should be with this person or not since i already have done this with them or should i just move on.
I am 35, strong believer in “no sex before marriage”. Waiting for the right person to marry. No hurry, Whenever I meet the right person 🙂 Divinity is most important, and staying with God and sex only after holy marriage bond is the most appropriate for me. It’s a personal choice. I am Hindu, it’s a way of life and values we grew up and lived with all our lives. And even most of your explanation solidifies my existing beliefs about same.
I’m so confused I told someone that sex before marriage is sin and they don’t believe me the Bible say fornication is sin means having sex with someone not married to this is what he replied … Sex without contractional agreement is a transgression at what point does the Bible consider you a married it is not when you stand before a pastor and he pronounces you man and wife that is church tradition they think Christian Church of tradition has framed my response and not the word of God please what’s the truth how can I know the word of God
Thanks Mark! These are some great balanced examples of why it’s better to wait! I do have a couple of comments. First, when it comes to self pleasing or doing things for our own pleasure only, I don’t know if marriage necessarily makes the difference. If we would have sex before marriage just to please ourselves, it’s likely that habit would continue in marriage. This can be seen in abusive relationships and in many men, even Christian, who think that their wife is just there to serve them. The roots of that behavior I think go a little deeper. I know that selfless living is something learned throughout life, but I imagine marriage is a great place to start learning it! Secondly, I don’t believe that masturbation alone is a sin. It’s too bad that we’ve heard it spoken as such so often from leaders we look to. Masturbation is a very natural way to relieve pressure and to feel pleasure, which there is nothing wrong with. For any of you men trying out Christian dating, you will know that even a little time spent next to your girlfriend means a build up of blood which causes pressure in your testicles. Really the only way to aliviate that pain is to masturbate! The reason I think masturbation has been named as sin in our days is because we link it to porn and lust, things which do bring shame. In a marriage, our significant others may not always feel like having sex. So if there is pressure down there, masturbate! We need to get past feeling false guilt and shame for this natural way to relieve ourselves!
Two important things that are never brought up in these articles are; unintended pregnancy with someone that you may not be Godly aligned with and temporarily/permanent STDs. These two important things are never discussed but potentially have profound consequences you will have to carry for your lifetime.
Any relationship where you’re having sex while you’re not married.. God will not bless this relationship and God is not in it.. stop having sex, repent and if you’re adults go get married at the courthouse and have a wedding for your friends with family later if money is an issue.. marriage is between the husband and wife and God.. don’t know why grown people take forever to get married.. it’s just plain stupid and our model of dating and relationships is not godly.. all these points he makes are good.. but only one reason is needed.. God won’t be present in your relationship if you’re having premarital sex.. that’s it
Romans 3:23 For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God; 24 Being justified freely by his grace through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus: 25 Whom God hath set forth to be a propitiation through faith in his blood, to declare his righteousness for the remission of sins that are past, through the forbearance of God.
Pre marital sex is wrong…so many consequences..but soul ties…transferrence of demons so many problems…marriage is honorable and all and the bed undefiled..God will bless your marital bed…you will experience much more fulfillment and joy…I’m waiting..I’m 57 and he’s 69 and we’re waiting and trust me everything still works on both of us like new…we want to please the Lord….
I have a question, can someone please answer ? I have avoided all the situations i could have sex; no one ever going to know, no strings attached and beautiful girls also. But what if I marry a women who have lost her virginity. I will feel so stupid for saving myself for marriage and this is my only chance for getting virgin girl. How should I react if this happens to me ?
As a married woman who’s had plenty of premarital sex: It feels exactly the same as sex right after you are married. Years into the marriage the sex gets even better, but that is because of years of experience and loving eachother, not because of a marriage certificate. You are free, do what feels right to you, you owe nothing to anyone.
As a believer to Jesus I absolutely disagree. We are not in Medieval age anymore. In the past there weren’t condoms or any other contraception so this rule was meant as protection for women so that they are not left alone with child in poverty. In the past people also got married much earlier in there twenties so it was doable… In these days average man gets married in his thirties. It’s impossible and harmful to your body to wait. This rule of waiting with sex until your marriage is outdated and unnatural. God doesn’t want that either…I didn’t wait and I absolutely don’t regret it.
I do not mean to disrespect anyone’s views, I say this hoping that this can be a platform for a calm and informative discussion. I was raised in a Catholic comminity, but that’s not how I identify. My family has there own issues with the Catholic church which I won’t go into. My problem with identifying with this religion is I fail to see why I should devote my life to God and only he or a priest can forgive me of my “sins,” otherwise I won’t go to heaven. I would like to believe that a truly benevolent God would ask you to live the best life you can with what you’re given, be the best person you’re capable of being, and to treat your fellow human with respect and kindness. It makes sense to me that the act of being kind and the best person you can be would grant you entrance to heaven. Again, I’m not trying to disrespect anyone’s views, I mean only to gain insight.
I do not expect men to remain their virginity till their wedding night. Let’s be natural here. Men were made to hunt and there are fun loving women out there. In case some girls are more conservative than the others, she should make her man wait but she should not wait too long to get him to marry her. Maybe before she turn 30. Holding too long she could risk losing her man to other girls who are more casual with her sexuality.
Well I am VERY upset that I CANNOT enjoy or experience something SO awesome, beautiful and physically POWERFUL God designed for married couples only!! More than once I have TOLD God I’m above and beyond FED UP with not having the blessing of a Christian wife who is also my BEST friend and dance partner, who I can also share my bed AND body with!! Oh well, so much for faith and prayers. 🙁
Could you do a series for teenagers?, Around 17-19 yrs old about dating and stuff and if one (as a teen) really means when he says he wants marriage. Maybe like a series on everything you talk about but talking to the youth because I’m going through stuff like this and it would be cool if you could talk to the youth.
12 Reasons to have sex before marriage: 1.Understanding sexual compatibility 2.Understanding sexual orientation of a person instead of being lied to 3.Improves immune system 4.Improves women’s bladder control 5. Decreases blood pressure 6. Decreases prostate cancer 7. Improves sleep 8. Decreases stress 9. Lowers risk of heart attack 10. Boost libido 11. Keeps check of mind and body health 12. Higher rates of Happiness
We chose sex before marriage, and are so glad that we did. Avoided a ton of pitfalls we would have suffered had we waited. Would you wait to talk before marriage? Of course not. So why would you wait until marriage to see if you are sexually compatible? If youre not, then you are really screwed my friends. Responsible, godly sex before marriage; make sure you are compatible. Sex is not a simple act, it is a complex and complicated activity that each person has different expectations of. Make sure you are with a match.
1. Not glorifying to God: wait so this excludes a lot of things like eating pizza and perusal comedy, neither of which would be very glorifying to God in anyway. 2. Sacrifice long term joy for short term pleasure: again the same example applies: eating pizza and perusal movies and buying a car and buying nice clothes and drinking coffee… all evil because it sacrifices long term joy for short term pleasure. 3. Decrease probability of getting married: wait so I can’t do anything that involves me not getting married?.. what exactly happens if I’m not planning on ever getting married, so is that a sin aswell?… this kind of puts an odd mark an being a pastor, which involves never getting married. This person is not filling you like the hole inside of you needs to be filled??… <> 4. Cause problems in the marriage: aren’t Christian divorse more often then the non-religious? This makes plenty of sense, because you get to essentially get close to the person prior to being married, which helps you understand whether you actually want to live with this person for the rest of your life, while Christians essentially never get to live together until they’re married, so by this logic sex before mariage should do the inverse of what you claim. 5. Stay in bad relationship: see point 4, having sex with someone will almost certainly help you see whether it’s a bad relationship or not by allowing you to live together as you would when you’ll be married. 6. Marrying someone who is not Christian: wait so now being attached to a person who isn’t worshipping your God is bad?? That sounds like something which should be a personal choice. Yes sex will and should contribute towards choosing a person to be with, because sex is part of human life, and again point 4. 7. Christian dating: we’re getting pretty far from the Bible here, and again see point 4. The shame and guilt you feel is a problem with believing that doing the sex is evil, and not a problem with the sex itself. 8. Pull away from Christian community: if your friends care about what you do in bed, then you should probably pick better friends. No you’re not going to struggle in other areas of your life just because you had some good side-sex, and yes this is purely a church thing. I’m now bored of the repeatition… and you still haven’t really given a good reason for why having sex before marriage is bad.
I’m engaged to my fiancé and we’re planning on getting married next year, 2 years ago we were both non-practicing Catholics living in sin for years, since then we have made great strides but continue to fall from time to time. We have to do better with the help of our lord Jesus Christ, but I loved the ending of this article, we go to adoration together every week and it’s some of the most intimate time together, we both love dancing as well and it’s some of my favorite things to do with her, Theology of the body has helped so much, please pray for us and our future marriage 🙏🏾
Wife and I were fortunate to marry as virgins 15 years ago, and if people TRULY understood the profound peace and joy of St. JP2’s theology of the body, and primarily what you said – the true gift of oneself is only fully attainable in sacramental marriage, and the celebration of and renewal of the sacrament through sexual union is: -Free -Total -Faithful & -Fruitful If you truly understood… you would rather DIE than violate the sacrament of marriage.
This is one of the most helpful, honest and practical articles on physical intimacy before marriage that I’ve ever seen!! Thank you so much. In my past relationship, I was really confused and conflicted about this and I know I confused my poor boyfriend as I tried to figure it out. Wish I’d seen this article a year ago, but I’m so glad I’m seeing it now!
I love how you were so honest, using proper wording and it was short and sweet and a perfect message! Also I just want to encourage anyone who has fallen into these sexual sins that you have some Saint friends to run to! St Mary Magdalene and St Augustine are some of my faves. Also there’s hope if past relationships have been overly physical. I struggled with this and then with the relationship with my husband we had a beautifully chaste courtship! Thanks be to God!
Ever since I left my old life of various addictions and sin, I don’t have to worry about this because I get one hug a week at a meeting unless the only woman that kind of talks to me a little doesn’t show up there. Then I cry for a couple days and struggle with prayer until I get over my selfishness again. So I will stop going there for awhile to see if I’m better without any physical contact at all because the only places it’s available to me is with women on drugs or prostitutes, both are things that lead me to sin that I don’t want in my life but to live as a lepper would live is definitely not the easiest cross to carry.
There’s a reason the wedding ceremony culminates with ” I now pronounce you husband and wife… you may NOW kiss your bride.” It is absolutely ok, and God-honoring, to wait to kiss. Nowadays we don’t want to wait for anything, but it wasn’t always like this. We didn’t always have to “test drive” everything before making a commitment- that’s the opposite of God’s word. God knew how our bodies would respond to kissing- He designed us that way. There really are other ways to experience physical touch without kissing and when you take kissing off the table, all those other small gestures hugging, holding hands, dancing-mean so much. I’m one year into a relationship where we drew those boundaries at the very beginning. Both of us were previously married and made our share of mistakes beforehand, and I wish I’d understood God’s plan for relationships years ago!
I actually glad i just finished perusal this article. Sometimes when i with my boyfriend and we spend time. We talk, laugh and kiss each other. There were moment . There were a time. I wanted to show intimacy in a very passionate way. But not realizing there are other ways we can be intimate without that feeling of fallen into sexual sin.
A major flaw of this article is that it does not define what is meant by “climax” because that could mean simply feeling bodily attractions to the other, which can happen randomly as the body has a mind of its own, if climax was defined as when the body begins to prepare to engage in the marital act, then that would have been very helpful
I appreciate your heart in making this article, and I think your intentions are excellent. But–and I mean this in all love and gentleness–I found this to be actually more confusing than helpful, because it’s explained in a convoluted way. You said “don’t engage in activities that lead to climax”, but then you proceeded to describe activities that lead to arousal. Arousal and climax are two different things. In fact, many women don’t usually climax from intercourse by itself, but we KNOW that intercourse is a sin before marriage. So, at first I was apprehensive, thinking you might say that removal of clothing is okay as long as no direct sexual stimulation is taking place, and I was going to disagree with that. But then, you said no tongue kissing, and I was like “oh, she means don’t do things that lead to a high level of arousal, which may vary depending on who you are, and I agree with that advice.” However, it may just be me. It seems other people in the comments found this article really clear, which is great. It’s possible that I should re-watch it and ruminate more on what’s being said in order to understand it better. So thank you for making the article.
So So True 🙌🏻, thank you for sharing this information! God comes first in my life, and if any male friend is invited in my day of life, for some reason I turn🙏🏼 to Jesus and trust He will keep me safe from any passionate kissing, physical emotional activity, etc.” I have lots of male friends who I help drive, or bring food to, and go on field trips with. Things always go pretty smoothly, except when I let my boyfriend come over once or twice a month. I never stay the night with him and never let him stay overnight with me. “But we still sin, 😔 it even hurts me besides makes me feel good.” We’ve been in a relationship for 15 years and I broke it off for three years and put all my life in Jesus’s hands 🙌🏻 that’s where I’m at now. 🙇🏼♀️ 💕 😊 “Trying to write a book! So I’m better off alone ” 😅
Bible also says to run from the face of evil… drawing such fine lines such as communicating “this is my limit, I gotta stop” is trusting that you will be able to stop, as if your flesh could be domesticated. Bible says we need to mortify our flesh not play with its limits. Also, even if you are able to domesticate and discipline your flesh in that sense, the other person may not and by being physically intimate you are provoking the other persons’ sexual instinct. Lastly, best case scenario, if you are not provoking the other person’s physical instinct (or yours-which is highly probable too), you are feeding an intention, a thought, an imagination in that persons mind. A desire which you will not be able to fulfill ; that sin is called lust in the Bible. Imagine this couple breaks up, they will have to deal with soul bounds that were created, when they could’ve simply just taken the relationship as a friendship and touched only after marriage. I know it sounds crazy for a lot of people but it’s actually very simple and wise way to guard your heart.Truth is we need to constantly guard our hearts without touching people! But by touching it makes it just harder. It’s like an alcoholic going to a bar. He can get out but his flesh will want the alcohol because our flesh is treacherous.
My individual opinion is If we are all altruistic =We are sinner If we are loving people and because of low intelligence and thus take the easier path, platonic! just skip finding our other half ( yeah, leave it for Christ to find her/him for you ) = we are sinner like little mermaid, we are lucky if we strive our best, we will be the bubble. ( see the ‘Fairy’ tale already foretold us ) So we wait until we meet Jesus again, bubbles disappear but then we enter eternity. Life is thus = a fairy tale
1Cor.7 Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman. Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband. My husband and i didn’t hold hands or even kiss until we were married. We courted for 10 months. Always supervised, never alone, never held hands, or hug. It was strictly get to know one another around family in a way that is acceptable to God and see if this is the person god wants you to be with. Grateful to say that there was no physical until marriage and how special it is to not have to compare or wonder or struggle with our past. It’s worth the wait.
You know, I appreciate the point you’re trying to make but I think because you spoke about it and roundabout way instead of just coming out right and saying don’t manipulate each other’s genitals or erogenous zones it could be easily misconstrued. Best example I can give is if one of my 20-year-old idiot buddies from the military had heard this I guarantee the first thing they would say is we can edge each other and be fine, and then the joke would be edging for the Lordagain I genuinely appreciate what you’re trying to say, but I had to listen thoroughly to understand what you’re trying to say😂 this is not a dig at you by any means
The problem here is that I don’t see this leading into a balanced relationship. Good help but the problem is here that this leads to the other person probably feeling like you don’t really want them. You stop every time you start feeling sexually aroused. I bet you can see why that would feel psychologically problematic. Climax and arousal are completely different things. Can’t say here, trying to keep this comment PG-13 at least. The problem is that both need to feel wanted by the other. Song of Solomon or Song of Songs.
Hold on babes, I’m confused. Around the 3:00 mark it’s sounding like you can’t have true sex (non-sinful, “fruitful” and God-abiding sex) unless no birth control is used and the goal is childbirth. That doesn’t make much sense to me because does that mean that married Christian couples who use contraceptives because they are not yet ready to have kids are sinning??
And this is the first job of a false teacher of Satan. Sin is anything we think say or do which breaks God’s law. 1 Jon 3:4-6, Whosoever committeth sin transgresseth also the law: for sin is the transgression of the law.\r \r 5 And ye know that he was manifested to take away our sins; and in him is no sin. 1 Corinthians 7:1-4, Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman.\r \r 2 Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.\r \r 3 Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband.\r \r 4 The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife. Beware, God is a righteous judge, and you will not be forgiven unless you repent and turn to the Lord Jesus Christ