This guide outlines the steps to escape an abusive relationship, emphasizing that everyone’s situation is unique. It highlights signs of abuse, such as physical abuse, abuse towards children, and fantasizing about harming a partner. Individual therapy can help individuals emotionally and physically recover from such situations.
Emotional abuse, which includes extreme moodiness, yelling, rejection, refusing to communicate, making mean jokes, making everything your fault, and being generally unkind to your spouse, can have both short- and long-term consequences. Prioritizing self-care and self-love is vital for survivors to avoid falling into another abusive relationship.
Community, family, and religion also play a role in why some people stay in abusive relationships. They may be afraid of being scrutinized by society or are used to doing things together. Abuse is about power and control, and when a survivor leaves their abusive relationship, they threaten the power and control their partner has established over the survivor’s agency, often leading to harmful retaliation.
To persevere, three approaches can be practiced: detachment, focusing on healing yourself, and seeking therapy as a couple or on your own. Staying in an unhappy marriage is a very dangerous situation, and it is essential to avoid emotionally abusive husbands or spouses.
The Bible condemns violence, as Malachi 2:16 shows. If you are married to an abuser and don’t want a divorce, staying well is not possible. It takes courage to escape domestic violence and abuse, but it is possible to live free of fear and protect yourself while exploring your options.
📹 You Should Stay In An Abusive Relationship 😃👍
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What is a silent divorce?
What is a silent divorce? A silent divorce is a gradual separation between couples. Intimacy, love, and connection erode, leaving couples feeling more like roommates than romantic partners. A silent divorce is not recognized by law. A legal divorce involves court proceedings, lawyers, and dividing property. A silent divorce is about emotional disconnection, indifference, and a lack of shared experiences. The couple may still live together and have children, but they don’t love each other anymore.
Signs of a Silent Divorce. A silent divorce isn’t discussed. But there are signs you might be going through a silent divorce. We list these signs below.
What are two signs of narcissistic victim syndrome?
Signs of NPD-related abuse: dissociation. People sometimes use dissociation to protect themselves from abuse. … Perfect appearances. … Smear campaign. … Doubt from others. … Isolation. … Struggling to make decisions. … They feel like they’ve done something wrong. Narcissistic victim syndrome is the mental, emotional, and other consequences of being in a relationship with someone with narcissistic personality disorder. Narcissistic victim syndrome describes the effects of living with and being abused by someone with NPD. Long-term abuse can cause anxiety, self-doubt, and other mental health problems.
Can the brain recover from emotional abuse?
Early help can help the brain recover from damage. If the child doesn’t get help, they’re more likely to have mental health problems, personality disorders, or abuse drugs or alcohol in the future.
It is also important to teach new parents how to take care of their children. Some parents have been abused and may need help from coaches and psychotherapy to stop the cycle of abuse. Childhood maltreatment is abuse or neglect of a child by a parent, caregiver, or other adult. It can be physical, sexual, emotional, or neglect.
What happens to the brain during emotional abuse?
Those who had experienced childhood trauma had different brain regions than those who had not. The most obvious changes were in the brain regions that help us control our emotions and impulses, as well as our thoughts. The study found that people who were abused or neglected as children are more likely to develop mental health issues later on.
Effects on the Brain. Childhood abuse and neglect can affect how the brain develops. Some effects are:
Smaller corpus callosum, which connects the two sides of the brain; Smaller hippocampus, which helps with learning and memory; Problems with the hypothalamic-pituitary-adrenal (HPA) axis, which helps with stress. Less volume in the prefrontal cortex affects behavior, emotional balance, and perception. Overactivity in the amygdala affects emotions and reactions to stressful or dangerous situations. Reduced volume of the cerebellum affects motor skills and coordination.
What is the miserable husband syndrome?
Miserable Husband Syndrome is when a man gets angry, frustrated, and anxious because he’s losing testosterone. This can be caused by aging, certain medications, or too much stress.
Can emotional abuse lead to divorce?
An emotionally abusive spouse can wear you down and do a lot of psychological damage. When you finally leave, they make the divorce more complicated. You don’t have to face them alone. A Shelby County, Tennessee divorce lawyer from our firm can help you get a fair settlement and freedom from an abusive relationship. What behaviors are considered emotionally abusive? Many behaviors can be emotionally abusive. Spouses can do all of these things to make you feel uncomfortable at home.
Isolating you from friends and family; cutting off your access to money and other resources; raising their voice at you; not allowing you to make decisions; stopping you from taking part in activities you once loved; threatening you; blaming you for their behavior; getting set off by any little thing.
What happens to a person after years of emotional abuse?
Mental health issues. Narcissistic abuse can cause emotional trauma, which can affect a victim’s mental health over time. It can also cause anxiety, depression, and PTSD. Victims may also have mood swings, anger, or emotional numbness.
Physical health issues. Narcissistic abuse also causes long-term physical health problems for victims due to the mind-body connection. These emotions can cause sleep problems, headaches, muscle tension, and stomach problems. Some victims neglect their health by eating poorly and abusing substances to cope with the abuse.
Difficulty functioning. In more severe cases, the effects of narcissistic abuse can make it hard to manage daily tasks and enjoy life. They might lose their job because of feelings of inadequacy or anxiety. It can be hard for them to form and keep healthy relationships, which can cause them to feel isolated and even suicidal.
Can a toxic wife change?
Some people think toxic relationships are doomed, but that’s not always true. What makes the difference? Both partners must want to change, says Manly. If only one partner wants to change, there’s little chance of that happening. Some signs you might be able to work things out:
Take responsibility. If you and your partner know your relationship is struggling and want to improve it, you’re on the right track.
Will my wife regret divorcing me?
How many people regret divorce? About 30% of people regret their divorce. About 27% of women and 32% of men regretted their divorce. People regret it for different reasons. Does infidelity cause divorce? Infidelity is one of the main reasons marriages end. It can happen in any marriage. About 25% of men and 20% of women cheat on their spouses. How many cheaters regret divorce? Most people who divorce because of cheating regret it. This is often because people rush into divorce and don’t plan for a happy life after marriage. An experienced attorney can help with this.
Should I divorce a disrespectful wife?
You decide how much of this behavior you can tolerate. If you don’t respect your spouse, there are bigger problems. Counseling might help you find the root of the problem and resolve the behavior. If it doesn’t improve and the disrespect continues, you might want to leave the marriage. If you do, make sure you know your legal rights.
What is the walk away wife syndrome?
What to do if you think your spouse might leave. Walkaway wife syndrome is more than just a phase. It’s the end of the relationship. She hasn’t said anything about divorce, but she’s checked out. What can you do when your wife no longer loves you? Can you resolve your issues, or is it too late? Think about yourself. Why do you want to save your marriage? You may have checked out too. Do you still love each other? Respect? Are you committed? Or is it just a convenience? Maybe you’ve been afraid to let it go. Know your reasons. If you still love and commit to each other, you’ll need to work at it. If not, it’s time to move on. Don’t waste your time.
Talk honestly. Don’t beg. You missed your chance. Just listen. Stop justifying yourself. Think about what she says from her point of view, even if you disagree. You’re at a crossroads. You may feel betrayed, but she has felt abandoned by you for a long time. If you want to save your marriage, don’t make her feel worse. Just. Listen.
How to deal with a cruel wife?
If your wife insults you, say, “Don’t call me names.” If you keep doing it, I’ll leave. Try to say the boundary when the behavior happens so there’s no confusion. Most abusive spouses have signs that show when abuse might happen. Your wife may hit you more when she’s drinking. If you see a trigger, leave. Leave the home and go somewhere safe. If you can’t leave, go to a room with a door that locks until your wife either leaves or calms down.
📹 Staying In Your Marriage “For The Kids”? Watch This | Mel Robbis
Should you stay in your marriage for your kids? Absolutely not. I tell you why in this video. If you’ve already done all that you can …
My dad was an abusive man. He used to be abusive towards his sister too. He used to abuse my mom emotionally and made her mentally exhausted but when it got physical she left him and got a divorce. 20 years later i thank god that she did. She’s now a strong confident woman. He got married after divorcing my mom and we got to know that his wife was being abused so badly the neighbors had to interfer sometimes to save her. I cannot imagine how our life would’ve been if she was still with him. I’m so grateful.
Also, I am incredibly scared for whoever they end up dating, marrying and or having children with. And if any woman could date them after seeing that episode they have to be extremely lonely and just as effed up and I hope they don’t have feckin kids! Do any of them even have partners currently? I wouldn’t be surprised if the answer is no. I get incel vibes from them also.
These men are obviously predators trying to manipulate young people (especially women) into remaining in abusive relationships where the man has 100% control and is able to gaslight them into believing that if they leave their abuser then they are a failure, giving up and don’t deserve love. Forcing two incompatible people to remain together is abusive and illogical, not strong and romantic. Traditional marriages didn’t break because the woman was the man’s property and had no choice and often could not access divorce or police support. I remember a story my granny told me years ago about a woman that was beaten half to death regularly by her husband and was repeatedly returned to him by the police. She developed alcoholism and lost her children. She couldn’t leave, even if she made herself homeless the police would take her back to her owner like a dog. It’s sick. These men should be investigated.
My dad was incredibly abusive towards my family. My mom wouldn’t leave him because of church dogma like this. She finały woke up and divorced him when he beat her half to death and killed our dog who was trying to protect her, my brother came home from work to my “dad” beating her and called 911. I was away at college. She divorced him in 2018 after 30 years of marriage. I wish she would have divorced that psycho earlier. Rip Max, you were a great dog and probably saved my mom’s life.
Telling someone to ENDURE abuse is fucking insane…. Imagine being a girl or guy right now getting beat everyday with kids involved perusal that episode and staying because they saw that. That episode needs to be removed from wherever asap. I highly suggest everyone to report it. That is SO harmful to literally every single person in the world because anyone can end up in that situation at any time of their life…. Fucking INSANE.
I was abused by my father as a kid and I live in a country where its kind of normal I guess. He abused my sisters and brother as well and my mother divorced him a year ago ( when I was 14). And let me tell you IT WAS TO LATE. The damage was already done. Please get out of an abusive relationship before its too late! Sending you all love❤
I have been perusal your content sporadically for a while. Finally subscribed and even though this topic is not funny at all, I get such a kick out of your reactions. You genuinely seem like a great guy with good values. Binging all of your articles now, wish you all the success in the future! ❤️ from Chicago.
These kind of articles used to pop up on my insta reels and there used to be like 90% supporters in comments. These are fuc***g toxic articles. Hearing this level of toxic shit makes u speechless. In what era are these people living. And this guy is incredible for actually talking about this toxicity in humorous way!!
Is it really that surprising that more women are willing to cut ties and leave abusive men when they have a college degree and thus make enough money on their own to be able to afford to leave? I certainly don’t think so. Also, while I’m not religious, I will say that any religion that encourages people to stay in abusive relationships doesn’t promote health and happiness as core tenants of its faith and thus should be relegated to the garbage bin where it belongs.💁🏼♀️
Are any of those losers married? Have they ever been or ever known a person in an abusive relationship? Makes me sick how they are just ignoring a real issue and brush it off like it never happens. I get what they say that you have to try and work through issues but NOT abuse, that is a no no, the same as cheating. If you are in an abusive relationship or have an unfaithful partner, get the hell out because that never gets better, you can’t work through that.
Where in the hell did they get the dude that thinks abusive relationships are rare??? We hear and see it everyday. People like him are the type that abuses partners and then justifies it by saying things like you made me do it, you know that makes me mad!!! He just vomits words answering the questions he was ask.
Thank you for calling out this show. I am conservative and although the men do make some good points on this show they clearly slant everything so that they are ALWAYS right. They need to be called out on their shit sometimes. It’s like the main guy got his heart broken and created his show to demonize women and make them look stupid. Both women AND men need to do better in dating and relationships. It’s not one-sided.
11:31 what he just said is the most stupid thing I’ve ever heard, because in the bible does indeed say that in case of cheating, divorce is allowed, but the bible also says that domestic violence is just as bad as a murder. In the bible, violence is an offence against God and against humanity. In the bible, violence is seen as a sign of weakness and condemned as “detestable to the lord”. And I’m particularly, the bible says that violence against women is condemned. And last but not least, violence can be condemned with death (“life for life, eye for eye, tooth for tooth, hand for hand, foot for foot”). Bible it is not my sacred book neither chatolic is my religion, but if he wants to talk about bible he must do it right and say what he is saying is condemned by the book he “follows so loyal”. It is unfair and insulting for anyone who actually follow the religion. And they don’t need to know any of what I just mentioned, but the basic of the bible is “A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another”. They don’t need to know the whole bible to know this, it’s basic. As I said it is not my religion but it is a known fact that the bible is to spread love not the opposite.
My Grandmother was married to 2 abusive husbands. She endured it until the abuse transferred to her kids. Once she was out on her own, paying her own bills, had a job, and taking care the kids she was so much happier. But the abuse effected the kids in to adulthood. “So cheating is worse than abuse?” The two women behind the row of men look like they are afraid to speak. My Mom had two divorces and for most of my life she was a single parent. Yes it was difficult, but she endured and proved she could do it on her own. Giving her daughters a string female remodel.
These men make me sick. Domestic abuse is not rare, it’s extremely common! Most victims suffer in silence and much is unreported, just like SA. They don’t understand statistics or the nuances behind why those numbers exist; statistics only exist for them to twist for their agenda. They completely misunderstand the abuse -> honeymoon period -> abuse cycle. You can’t live your life walking on eggshells while waiting for the next honeymoon period. The woman at 12:00 was dead on; children who witness or are victims of domestic violence at home are much more likely to be victims of DV in their adult lives or repeat the pattern of abuse with their own partners. Also huge kudos for her for staying so eloquent, I can hear how fast her heart is beating through her voice and I’d be just as pissed in her position & idk if I could hold my composure as well as she did. She did really well.
Honestly, I am starting to think that people should go trough some kind of legal permission or something, in order to have a podcasts..🙄 It’s always “unqualified”, not professional what so ever in any topic they are disscusing, that are “a lot to say know-hows” that always spread terrible advise that can be out right dangerous and harmful..
my mother almost lost her life in abusive relationship, if she didnt get out she would be dead by now. we were kids back then, traima for many years to come, i had long time into my adulthood Post drama stress disorder. you should never stay in abusive relationship,because that is not love, its toxic and unhealthy and will leave you all fucked up in the future. BTW abuse gets only worse longer you stay, these people have never been in real abusive relationships,they dont know what they talking about.
I fell under the evil hands of an abusive boyfriend, and during that time, my entire soul was broken and the only way I could cope with what happened to me was to blame myself! It took me going into hiding to get away from him. And eventhough its 5 years later, I still live in constant fear of running into him. Abuse IS NOT A PHASE!!! Its not ok and not acceptable and to the guy who suggested that abuse should be endured, has maybe never found himself in such a situation. So just keep your thoughts within that tiny brain of yours. Thank you Layze for helping me go through some really tough times!! ❤
As a young dude seeing them older boys trying to said abuse is just something you have to grew out of and endure it is just plain dissapointment, I grew up abused and mentally abused by my father’s side of family. And I can tell you that stuff follows me wherever I go in my memories. Idk what to say anymore and how they even get a podcast in the 1st place when they are useless advisors. Someone please take away those boys platform. They’ll never be men.
Story time: I stayed with an abusive man for 7 years, had 3 children and probable brain damage. Finally moved on after my youngest son died because the ex had tb and spread it to our baby … I moved on to find a sweet man but the PTSD had me freaking out causing fights and having delusions. He moved on to beat his next woman, never pay child support and possibly end the life of my loving husband… now all I can think about is how much I regret the fights I picked, life hurts…I can’t believe these dummies could be hurting so many women and children with that
I couldn’t watch this article – I tried but I had to stop and skip to the end. But I love your article’s Layze… This one just hit to close to home for me. I grew up in a horrible household full of abuse (parents abusive towards each other and also neglect and abusive towards us as kids too) and it was so bad and dysfunctional that I grew up having a lot of issues – compulsively pulling out my eyelashes and hair when I was 10 progressing to depression, SH and an eating disorder that nearly killed me… Seeing how my parents relationship was terrified me from all kinds of relationships and I didn’t have a “proper” boyfriend until I was 31 and sadly, I didn’t even realise it, but fell for someone who was a true psychopath and who only got with me to use me and abuse me – not that it started out that way – When he was grooming me (for want of a better word) he was prince charming – He could tell I was wounded and vulnerable and smelt that I was/had been devoid of love all my life like how a shark can smell one drop of blood in the ocean and zero i on it… He abused me in every way you can imagine… And he made my life miserable and I stayed because at first I believe everything was my fault and I needed to do better and if he was upset or not happy then that was because of me and I was always to blame… But eventually when it became clear tht he was just with me to take from me, be his supply for what ever he needed at all times and got nothing but abuse and being made to feel s than back.
The point he tried to make is clear and speaks volumes. When women are educated and can provide for themselves, they are least likely to remain in an abusive relationship. That man is evil ! He would probably knock up his wife with a lot of kids, and tell her to not work, which now she is solely dependent on him . He can abuse her mentality and physically and with a lot of kids and no education she will stay in most cases .
Endure the pain? Why? I love me and don’t need a man to feel happy…if I feel worse around him then it’s a wrap. I don’t understand promoting codependency and ab&se tolerance….just why? I guess some people despise their own company so much they NEED someone else to feel okay? Then get therapy, that’s not normal!
I left a very abusive relationship like it was really bad. Fortunately when I found out I was pregnant he stopped hurting me so I thought he changed but as soon as the baby came out he started up again (shocker right) anyways he beat my ass for the last time in front of my newborn. I didn’t want my child growing up perusal their mother get hit or them being abused. I know this sounds ridiculous to say but he had me under a spell I have no idea I can’t believe I put up with it for so long it hurt to leave him but my child meant more to me than anything so I dipped. We were in South Dakota and I went back home to Phoenix AZ. I also finally put his ass in jail oh and when I went to the hospital they told me that I was on the verge of death because he would choke me repeatedly etc. Sorry if I got a little too deep. TMI? Anyways I am against abortion and I know a lot of people don’t agree with that but I am allowed to have my own opinion please don’t attack me for it.
Thank you for reminding me that there are still sane people out there and not a bunch of red pill podcasters that lack basic comprehension skills 😭 Also, why are they bringing up religion? I’m Catholic myself but why are they even bringing up the Bible and Jesus into this conversation 💀 They’re basically saying that everyone should live their lives the way Catholics do and all other religions/non-religious people are living “wrongly”.
“Noooo, divorse is SO bad for the children! You NEED to stay in the marriage, even though your husband is nearly unaliving you every single night. The children NEED to see that, it’s very important. ESPECIALLY for the boys! So that way, the boys will grow up, seeing that example. And then they’ll know, that they NEED to put their future wives in their places as slaves and maids. The boys need to know that women ARE property, they aren’t real people. And one more thing… if the wife is nearly getting unalived every single day, that’s totally okay, she will go to hell if she leaves him. BUT! If the wife so much as cheats, or looks at another man, then you can divorse, heck, nail her to the cross, even. It’s what God intended!” – That’s BASICALLY what these people are saying. LMAO LIKE WHAT.
12:18 – 12:22 … That’s the question after perusal this. Scary that such a group of people who think like this exists, found each other, created a group and ARE VERBALISING THEIR SCARY NONESENSE IN THE NAME OF PODCASTS. Regulations, accountability and consequences should exist and should apply to such things. As radical extremists as one of the groups sound here, they should be okay with that I believe.
Would love to see these guy’s in a same sex relationship then try to say “it’s not abuse” when their partner give’s them a black eye and broken rib every now and again. Let’s be honest though, they’d never be public with their Grindr profiles because they don’t see it as “manly” and “Godly” because they think bottoming is shameful. All’s I can say is all we have to do with people like this is wait until they’re thrown in jail for domestic abuse, considering they clearly have no idea what qualifies as jail-able actions. They can think something isn’t violence all they want, the court’s definitely won’t see it in their eyes as such lmfao💀
Only been in 4 serious relationships since I was 14. All abusive and I tended to attract narcissists ✨ it is so so so so so so so so so so hard to leave and being forced into a . Corner for the sake of being a people pleaser. It’s so hard to leave like even after being physically thrown around, verbally degraded is till stayed. It’s not as simple as just walking out the door because if it was mentally that easy this wouldn’t ever be an issue or a reoccurring problem for so many people, men or women.
Them saying abusive relationships are something RARE and that is only a 1% thing is so ridiculous, there is not a single woman I have known in my life who hasn’t been abused at some point in her life, INCLUDING ME. He’s talking bullshit bUT STATISTICS ARE SCREAMING FACTS. AND YET HE DECIDES TO IGNORE THE TRUTH. At this point they’re just outing themselves as ABUSERS TRYING TO MAKE THEIR VICTIMS INSIGNIFICANT AND GASLIGHT THEM.
I had three kids with my ex and it was a very mental emotional and sexually abusive and it does end up hurting the children in the end I was so afraid of leaving him because he was our provider I was afraid of breaking up my family because I grew up a strong Christian I was afraid of what my family would think but at the end of the day I saw what it was doing to our family as a whole it was the hardest decision I had ever made but two and a half years later him and I are on much more common ground and we put our kids first. Do you and don’t allow other people dictate what you need to do
I don’t like divorce but I do understand if someone wants one due to abuse. I think with anything the best way to avoid a bad situation is to prevent it which starts waaaay before marriage like – teaching kids to respect others and how to deal with stress and problems so they don’t develop maladaptive habits like throwing tantrums and/or releasing anger through violence – not rushing to get married or making rash decisions – understand that before marriage both couple should be mentally mature, emotionally mature, financially prepared, and psychologically prepared for all the responsibilities and consequences that comes with marriage – both parties must be honest
My mom was abused… everyone told her especially her mother in law that shes getting beaten bcs she cant shut up…. she left tho. She was married to him only 2 years. And this whole thing traumatized her so much that after her divorce she never got married again. No boyfriend no nothing. She was 23 when she divorced him… now she is 42
The Gospel message is a message of love. Jesus Christ IS love. He embodies it. It’s who He is. Therefore, when a church does not frown upon abuse in marriage, then they don’t understand the love of Christ. They don’t understand what a biblical marriage looks like and they don’t realize how what they are advocating is bringing shame upon the love that Christ has for His children. And yes, God hates divorce. His Word is very clear on this! But, God is also a God of love. And again, His Word is very clear on this. 🙂 If God would advocate abuse in marriage, then why on earth would a woman want to get married and subject herself to such nonsense? The logic here doesn’t add up. And let’s not forget that God is not the author of confusion. For God is not the author of confusion but of peace. 1 Cor. 14:33 God can not endorse and embrace abuse in marriage because it contradicts His character. And since marriage is designed to represent Christ, the teachings of such churches embracing abuse is heretical and it is blasphemous to the Word of God. It’s already been established that God is a God of love and therefore He doesn’t approve of abuse, and marital rape is abuse! So let’s get that straight right now! God has never given the husband the right to force his wife to do anything. A wife is not his property, slave, or child. She is God’s daughter. Yes, our bodies belong to our spouse but that doesn’t mean they can violate us. Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Ephesians 5:21 The teachings that the Apostle Paul gave in the verses of 1 Corinthians 7:3-5 are designed to protect our marriage and to keep us from sexual temptation.
Okay, so I attended a Southern Baptist college for about 2 years before dropping out. Abuse and adultery are quite literally named in the Bible as being reasons to divorce. Even my craziest ass professors made it clear that abuse required immediate separation and should have church support. So even from a biblical/religious perspective, they are wrong.
My father abused my mother and sisters for years till she got a divorce. He was friends with the judge so he got away with everything and we still had to go over to his house. Everyone thought my mom was lying and just wanted to ruin my dad’s life. He ended up remarrying into a family that just got out of an abusive relationship of their own and lied to them about it. For years he was less open and more subtle about the physical abuse to my brothers and emotional abuse towards all of us but it still happened. My older brother got the worst of it, going through his first abuse either his real father then gets treated the worst by my father. He’s still in the house right now because he didn’t want to leave my little brother alone in there. My father gets away with everything because everyone loves him and thinks he can do no wrong. Abuse isn’t just a phase and some people will not change. Those people are disgusting for saying such things.
I will say that as a former CPS caseworker, we remove children for domestic violence households, it’s an unsafe environment for young children. If the child is older and can seek help we can have court oversight and children can stay with the non offending parent as long as the abuser moves out or non offending parent and children go to DV shelter or to another persons home that’s safe. But I fully disagree with the podcasts views they’re ridiculous, so many DV relationships have ended in the victim’s death and the children to be traumatized or injured as well. Hope that helps clarify from CPS’s perspective
I grew up in a very abusive home with a physically, emotionally, and physiologically abusive father and my mom divorcing my dad was our only way out of that situation. Hearing these boys talk about how the woman/man should stay in the relationship just because ya know marriage, and the only way it would be justified to have a divorce is if your in that final phase of the abuse where it beacons life threatening is complete bullshit. In the case of physical abuse vs divorce I would take divorced parents over living in the environment any fucking day. And staying in relationships like that can be detrimental to the kids. These boys need to go tf back to school.
I’m 54 and my ex husband is a narcissist. I was with him for 15+ years we had two children together. He beat me up for those years i was with him and also mental torture to from him. When I said I was leaving him he was going to cull himself and our children I’m so glad he’s a coward and didn’t do it. Those men don’t know what they are talking about and sounds like narcissists to.
I think these kind of people need therapy and mental support. They suport violence I suspect they might have been or are still abusers. Very dangerous for society monsters can create other monsters. 😢 these individuals are those who have a problem with the control of their anger most of the time. Very sick..
Its the crazy Christians! They can’t even reason on the idea of divorce! Obviously abuse, is a situation you shouldn’t just put up with, if keeps happening, obviously realistically,should split. One of them, ( can’t remember name)also mentioned women should totally obey their husbands! Winen shoukd apparently be controlled.Sorry, no, that is not a relationship!
Omg. The college thing freaked me out!! Bc my ex wouldn’t let me go to college.. he didn’t want me “meeting someone new” 🙄 you know, bc I’m such a slut! Not that I would be encouraged to not be treated like crap and decide to leave.. just bc I want other dudes … riiight. Anyways! He was so possessive over me and still trieds to be now, even tho I left 14 yrs ago. I have learned to jot let him bother me at all anymore bc he clearly has issues ! But what I wanted to say is, the reason why more women initiate divorce is bc guys get possessive and think they deserve to keep their wife even when they cheated and are abusive sometimes.. and of course most men are stronger than their wives so it’s kinda scary being in a house with someone who could kill you if they felt like it .. especially when they have threatened that they will! I am extremely empathetic and I still cannot even begin to fathom thinking like that… narcissism isn’t cute!
These guys are so repulsive. Oh so if a wife cheats it’s grounds for divorce ( I wonder if it’s the same if the husband cheats) but if the husband beats his wife or children that’s just a lil time out in the corner. His logic made no sense when he said it’s more damaging for the kids if the wife cheats then if the husband beats his wife every now and the when he is drunk?????? The kids would probably have no idea of an infidelity but would be very much aware and effected by their father beating and abusing their mum. Don’t get me wrong cheating is horrible but to say it’s far worse than beating up your wife is crazy. Again I wonder if the situation varies depending on if it’s the husband or wife doing either one of these things?
So your telling me I should have stayed with my husband after he blackened my eyes, broke my jaw and broke my ribs? I swore after I left and got my divorce no one would ever hurt me again! I became a body builder, wrestling champion, and I carry! I was 19 when that happened today I’m 69 and have been free of that fuckingmaniac for 50 years!! If I saw him today and he threatened me he’d be a goner! He was arrested for what he did and deported back to Greece! Someone told me he’s in prison in Greece, maybe he finally killed someone.
The guy in the striped shirt! 🤢🤮🤬 Disgusting you can just tell he’s probably and abuser how hard he goes to f*cking defend it amd the way he refuses to let the women in the room speak everytime they try to speak he immediately CUTS them off! These people are just so fricken sick and disturbed this whole conversation just illuminates how society views abuse and why victims recieve NO help!
Holy crap promoting staying with abusive partners is scary. Sadly abuse is so common in relationships my church literally has a protocol on what to do if someone says they’re being abused. If you don’t divorce an abusive spouse they can still mess with your life. If you are being abused, end that relationship and protect yourself. Nobody deserves abuse
I’m gonna take a stab in the dark and assume this guy who thinks people should just endure abuse and mistreatment is a big narcissist that can’t control his temper and has a melt down every time he doesn’t get his own way because he has no idea himself how to “endure” the tough times or how to compromise and be patient and is just trying to reflect and push the narrative that partners should just cop the raw end of his undisciplined, selfish, spoiled and bratty behaviour because he can’t control or regulate his own emotions and behaviour and is trying to shift the blame and fault onto the other person by gaslighting the shit out of them. Geeez I bet he would be a real gem to have as a husband .
Bro the audacity of that black shirt guy to call an abusive household a phase blud ITS NOT A FUCKING PHASE triggers me honestly cuz I grew up in a abusive household and besides his arguement was fucked up growing up in a abusive household and raising healthy families is def cuz the abused children know what not to do to hence raising a healthy family meanwhile a abusive romantic relationship is not the same enduring it will only get u stuck w a abusive person for life and yes I get that some people change but that’s a rare case usually theres no end to the abuse plus it could end w the partner leaving so wtf enduring it is the stupidest fucking decision in all situations its triggering how these men speak as if they have experience
So, I keep seeing comments comparing abuse to abortion, and I have something to say. ABORTION IS NOT BAD!! It’s not murder, it’s healthcare. Making abortion illegal is stealing someone’s rights, as it’s THEIR bodies!!! Not yours!!! (I’m not saying abuse is good, just saying that comparing abortion to abuse makes no sense. One is okay, one isn’t.)
Oh yeah… after my mentally abusive Ex boyfriend found another girlfriend.. he raped a 13 year old girl.. yay! I totally should’ve stayed, i should’ve kept letting him rape me in the mirror looking at me in the eyes and smile when i cry. You right!! Wow, people change.. you know what happened to my “changed ex” hes in jail now
Kids gather round, i’m about to educate. If you ever start a podcast someday and the urge to think/speak like these imbeciles arise, PLEASE, remember you live on planet earth, meaning someone out there will get really triggered and they’ll make it their lives mission to leave you in a dark hole without a pulse. So let’s say it together, always Stop, Think and then Speak 😊.Happy times.
Someone needs to ban this misogynistic, narrow minded podcast… To start, abuse is NOT a phase and it can become learned behavior for the children who watch it. I once dated a guy who watched his dad beat his mom until she had the sense to leave. He was a Jekyll and Hyde type. When he was nice to me, he was Prince Charming. But when he was in a mood… And he’d always apologize, say he was sorry, it would never happen again… until it did. It’s NOT okay and you should NEVER stay in relationships like that under ANY circumstances. Especially if you have children. They often learn how to treat their mate or how they should be treated by a mate from perusal their parents (like my ex did). Is that how you want YOUR kids to treat or be treated? No? Then get out while the getting is good… And divorce? It doesn’t hurt kids any… I hated my father for my own reasons (that I’d rather not get into, some people are just sick and wrong) and when I met a friend who lived in a divorced household where it was just her, her sister and her mom, I started wishing my father would get out so my house could be like my friend’s. One day, my parents started fighting badly behind closed doors. Sometimes we’d get sent next door to my grandmother’s. One day a call came that my sister answered that upset her. She was 13 at the time (she’s 5 years my senior) and when I asked what was going on, she didn’t want to tell me. But my persistence paid off and she told me my father was having an affair. This was around 1981, I was 8, so kids then didn’t know about things like that.
I do believe abusers can change with time and work. And no I’m not being naive. My father still hasn’t changed. But I choose to believe the chance will always exist. I don’t throw anyone away. Even the man who held me at gunpoint. But divorce is not for throwing people away. It’s for ending a relationship that no longer exists, safety, and healing. So I’ve always been supportive of my mom’s divorce.
Abuse isn’t a phase. But people these days are so fickle and flutter from person to person having lots of sex on the way. Rather than getting to know someone over time before committing to sex. That’s where this generation goes wrong. This is what these men are getting at. Third trimester abortion is so vile and disgusting. Particularly when it’s for self gain. I love your articles usually. But this one sucks a$$