My Best Friend’s Wedding is a 1997 film that tells the story of two best friends, Jules (Roberts) and Michael (Mulroney), who make a pact to marry each other if neither had found someone to love by the age of 28. The film ends with Julianne, who schemes and manipulates situations in an attempt to break up their engagement. Julia Roberts, who played Michael, has expressed her desire for a sequel to the movie.
The film was one of the highest-grossing and most profitable films of 1997, earning nearly $300m on a budget of just $38m. The film finished in eighth place in the end of year. Julia Roberts wants a sequel to My Best Friend’s Wedding, and the film could be a potential sequel if the two leads have anything to do with it.
Julianne finds Kimmy in the bathroom of Comiskey Park, where she confronts Jules for interfering with Michael. Jules apologizes, assuring Kimmy that Michael truly loves her, and they reconcile. At the wedding reception, Jules gives a heartfelt speech as Kimmy’s maid of honor. She tries to manipulate the couple into breaking up for good, but Michael and Kimmy decide to get married.
The original ending for My Best Friend’s Wedding finds Julianne sitting alone at Michael and Kimmy’s wedding, sadder and wiser as she lets the situation unfold. However, the scene that could have changed the whole ending is when Michael looks at her and the “when” he looked at her.
📹 ‘My Best Friend’s Wedding’ Reunion ft. Julia Roberts, Dermot Mulroney & More | PEOPLE
In 2019, Entertainment Weekly reunited the cast of the 1997 blockbuster for the cover of the Untold Stories issue dedicated to …
What did Jules do in my best friends wedding?
The next morning, Jules learns that Michael and Kimmy kept the wedding a secret. She tries to make them break up, but they decide to get married. Jules kisses Michael. Kimmy leaves, followed by Michael and Jules. Jules calls George, who says Michael loves Kimmy. Jules finds Michael at Chicago Union Station and tells him everything. He forgives her and says they split up to look for Kimmy at the station, where he proposed to her. Jules finds Kimmy in the bathroom at Comiskey Park. Kimmy confronts Jules for interfering with Michael. Jules apologizes and says Michael loves Kimmy. They reconcile. The wedding goes on, and at the reception, Jules gives a speech as Kimmy’s maid of honor. Jules lets the newlyweds use “The Way You Look Tonight” as their song until they find their own. Jules and Michael say goodbye. On the phone with George, Jules is surprised to see him at the reception and they dance.
Do they get together in my best friends wedding?
The most significant way that My Best Friends Wedding refuses to play by 1990s rom-com rules is by denying its heroine a happy ending. Though she does confess her feelings, Michael still marries Kimmy, and Jules finally accepts the situation with what little dignity she has left. Its George who shows up to dance with her at the wedding, a reminder that sometimes your ‘person may not be someone with whom youre romantically involved. *My Best Friends Wedding could be a feminist masterpiece, refusing to play by the rules of the genre and letting each person get what they deserve. However, in 2022, one thing doesnt sit well: 20-year-old Kimmy is saddled with Michael. However attractive Mulroney might be, it doesnt make up for his inability to set boundaries and his willingness to have his wife abandon her career goals in favor of his. Instead, its the sort of end-of-a-rom-com wedding where you cant hope but think – and maybe hope – that the marriage would end in divorce within a few years. *Over the past twenty-five years, My Best Friends Wedding has remained part of popular culture, continuing to inspire fear in girlfriends of men with female best friends. (I promise were not all like this!) Before COVID struck, there were even plans for a London musical adaptation of the film. After all this time, it continues to go against the conventions of a rom-com, and it would hold up splendidly if it didnt punish poor Kimmy by having her end up with a man who is a walking red flag.
Do Julianne and Michael end up together in my best friend’s wedding?
In My Best Friend’s Wedding, Jules tries to ruin her best friend’s wedding. She finally accepts that Michael loves Kimmy, and the last scene shows her dancing with her editor and best friend, George. Jules didn’t get her happy ending, but the sequel could remedy that. It’s been over 20 years since the original release. A sequel could show how Julianne has grown, her career, and how she finally found love.
What is the last scene in marriage story?
The final scene of Marriage Story is very touching and sums up the main ideas of the film. As Charlie takes Henry out, Nicole calls to them. She runs over, ties Charlie’s shoelace, then says goodbye. It’s a simple gesture, but it shows how close Nicole and Charlie are. Charlie loves that Nicole cuts his and Henry’s hair. This moment of intimacy and trust lasts throughout their marriage. Even when they are at their worst, she still offers to cut his hair. They always take care of each other, even though they’re in a legal battle. After the divorce, Nicole still wants Charlie to be safe. She notices things like a loose shoelace. Those feelings don’t end just because of the divorce.
Charlie and Nicole’s divorce lawyers help them. Nicole hires lawyer Nora Fanshaw (played by Laura Dern), a tough woman who makes Nicole get Charlie to hire a lawyer for a long fight. They agreed to split amicably, but they’re now in court. Nora is right. Nicole feels overwhelmed by Charlie, which could hurt her in any negotiations with him. Charlie meets with two lawyers: Bert, who wants to settle, and Jay, who wants to fight. Charlie hires Bert at first, but when the meeting with Nicole and Nora goes wrong, he brings in Jay, paying for him with money from a MacArthur Fellowship grant. Once the case goes to court, Nora and Jay try to win over the judge by making their opponents look bad. Nora says Charlie was unfaithful and didn’t understand Nicole. Jay says Nicole is an alcoholic. Charlie and Nicole try to stay friendly outside of court and spend time with their son. They must go on with their lives despite the drama. Neither Nora nor Jay are bad people in Marriage Story, even though they make things difficult for Charlie and Nicole. They’re just doing their job and doing it well because divorce is often ugly and experts are needed to make the process as smooth as possible.
Does Jules sleep with Anna?
Anna Jules and Rue weren’t in a relationship, but Jules knew Rue liked her. Jules still has sex with Anna. She tells Rue they had sex and compares Anna to her. Jules Vaughn is one of the fan favorites of Euphoria, but she has some disappointing moments. Jules seems free-spirited, adventurous, and confident at first glance. There’s more to her than meets the eye. Jules battles depression and has a history of bad relationships. Fans don’t know what will happen to Jules and Rue Bennet’s relationship after season 2 of Euphoria. Jules’s past continues to affect her. Her relationship with Rue is a big part of this. Jules has hurt people in both seasons. Jules has a pattern of sleeping with older married men she meets on dating apps. Jules has already been unfaithful to her husband, but then she slept with Cal Jacobs. Cal is the father of Nate Jacobs. This one decision leads to bad choices and situations for different characters. This made us feel sorry for Jules.
Who does Julie end up with in my best friend’s wedding?
George Jules is the chaotic main character of My Best Friend’s Wedding. Her journey shows how platonic love can be touching. The film ends with Jules and George together. I fell in love with the 1997 anti-romantic comedy a few years ago and it has been my go-to for a movie night rewatch ever since. But my friends’ reactions to the film have always been interesting. After the credits, some say Jules is the worst. They’re not wrong. I love Julia Roberts’ character because she’s funny and knows that her romance is doomed. The movie makes Jules look bad. The film follows Julia Roberts as Jules Potter, a 27-year-old food critic who falls in love with her best friend Michael (Dermot Mulroney) and tries to win him over even after he marries another woman (Cameron Diaz). How could anyone like this woman who does bad things for 105 minutes? Jules struts into New York City in an oversized Armani suit with her curls bouncing. She has four days to ruin Michael and Kimmy’s wedding. But her composure is quickly tested when she’s made Kimmy’s maid of honor and thrown into wedding preparations. In My Best Friend’s Wedding, we see that Jules is relatable in a way that goes beyond the surface. From the start, she cares about Michael. She tries to do right by him.
Do best friends really end up together?
Best friends can fall in love and sometimes get married. But your friend might not feel the same way.
How old was Cameron Diaz in My Best Friend’s wedding in real life?
In the film, the two play love interests in their late 20s. But when the film came out in the summer of 1997, Mulroney was 33 and Diaz was 24. Matthew McConaughey and Kate Hudson are over nine years apart. They starred together in How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days. In 2003, Hudson was 23 and McConaughey was 33.
Who is the villain in my best friend’s wedding?
Is the film saying gay people are just like everyone else? George is not a stereotype. The film treats him the same as anyone else. The film’s main character is the villain. He’s her friend, and he’s her moral compass. George is a good person. He goes to the wedding reception at the end to console a friend who might ruin the wedding. He whispers “gay” to Jules on the phone, but I can still see that moment being the same now. George would be more comfortable being gay now. George doesn’t care what others think. He’s too awesome for that. However, he knows this isn’t about him, so he whispers the word that should be said louder now. They meet at the reception. Then they dance, smile, and laugh. The credits roll.
Is there an alternate ending to my best friend’s wedding?
The studio wanted to reshoot the wedding night scene so that Julianne spent it with her gay friend George. This scene is one of the best movie endings of all time.
What happens at the end of the movie My Best Friend’s wedding?
In the 90s rom-com My Best Friend’s Wedding, Julianne (Julia Roberts) says goodbye to her best friend Michael (Dermot Mulroney) and his bride Kimmy (Cameron Diaz) after they get married. At the wedding reception, Julianne dances with George, her gay friend played by Rupert Everett. However, the ending was going to see Julianne meet a new man, played by John Corbett. Test audiences hated the movie and Julianne. “They wanted her dead,” said director P.J. Hogan. “They didn’t understand her.” The studio exec asked Hogan the day after the test screening, “How are you going to save this movie?”
What is the age difference between Cameron Diaz and Benji?
The 7-year age gap between Cameron Diaz and Benji Madden rarely comes up because we rarely see them together. They had a daughter, Raddix, in 2020 and a son, Cardinal, in 2024. Our websites and apps use cookies. Cookies:
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📹 My Best Friend’s Wedding & Reframing Romance
Instrumentals used (in order of appearance): “there is a light that never goes out” – the smiths “i’m goin’ down” – mary j. blige …
A few years back a VERY close male friend got engaged, one who I actually hadn’t dated but HAD confessed my feelings for, and got the response a few years earlier that “I do like you a lot, but I’m honestly not ready to date anybody right now.” I still had a lot of unresolved feelings for him, and for a while considered letting him know that I still loved him, but reminded myself that what I want isn’t necessarily what he needs, and so I kept my mouth shut and attended their wedding without saying a word. They’re very happy together and I know she’s a much better partner for him than I would have been, so I’m glad I never said anything; I have no doubt that the only way things would have turned out differently is that I would have damaged or destroyed my friendship. I love this movie because I can relate to the feelings of “I loved him first, we’re close, he should be with me”, but the reality of the situation is that the best way you can show love to your friend is by supporting them and being there when they need you. It’s a great cautionary tale.
Hmmm… seems like the biggest difference between My Best Friend’s Wedding and the other movies mentioned is that in MBFW it’s a woman acting inappropriately, which is portrayed as bad, but in the rest of the movies it’s a man, so that’s romantic and admirable. Very inch resting… though I think if they made a movie about a man stalking a woman where it’s portrayed as bad, it would no longer be a romantic comedy…
“You’re feeling that she’s chasing after something that’s already gone” I love this line you said because it’s so real and so sad. She wants something that she had but it’s not there anymore and there’s no way for her to really ever have it back. He’s moved on. And she knows she should too but she doesn’t want to. That’s what’s so heartbreaking about it all. And god the toast scene always always brings me to tears bc it’s like she’s sending him off to his new life without her and she’s finally understanding that it’s over and she’s letting go. But I love that it has a hopeful ending. I absolutely LOVED your analysis and agree with you 100% <33
I liked this movie as a kid for some reason but it wasn’t until recently upon a rewatch that I ended up loving it! It’s such a smart movie and I love that it doesn’t resort to the tropes that we expect from romcoms, but instead turns them around and makes you realize that, yeah, love isn’t always ours nor is it ours to claim when it belongs to someone else
I feel the same about some criticisms I’ve seen of Groundhog Day. I’ve heard people say, “oh my gosh, he is so toxic the way he tries to stalk his love interest, it’s PROBLEMATIC,” and I’m like… yeah, that’s the point. And you know it’s the point because he keeps getting caught out when he tries to win her over that way. And when she slaps him and storms off the framing is all about making you sympathetic towards her. And it’s not until he lets go of chasing her and focuses on self-improvement that he ends up winning her… Have you watched the film? Framing is everything.
I’ve always loved this movie exactly because of how Jules is clearly the villain AND DOESN’T GET THE GUY IN THE END. It was such a refreshing and honestly more realistic take on the genre. And while the movie has its problems (Kimmy’s age, Jules’ wardrobe) i love to revisit it to watch just how unabashedly messy and “evil” the main protagonist makes herself out to be, and how the writers actually dared to have her FAIL in the end, (but also own her awfulness and ultimately grow from it.) George’s “Who’s chasing you? Nobody!essence
i loved this article. rom-com’s don’t need to be realistic!! and that’s why we love them. i probably thing about mindy kaling’s quote about rom-coms on a daily basis – “I simply regard romantic comedies as a subgenre of sci-fi, in which the world created therein has different rules than my regular human world.”
When I saw this movie years ago, I interpreted the ending as Julianne getting what she didn’t know she needed. I saw that realization of loving Michael as fear of losing her best friend above all. Yeah there was some unresolved romantic feelings there, but it was more about losing their relationship as it was. Once she “lost him” she found herself with a new best friend thanks to George. IDK, that’s what I understood
I wish you made a second part taking this in mind and the movie Made of Honor with Patrick Dempsey. It’s the exact same premise but he’s a man and he gets the girl. He’s never portrayed as “in the wrong” but his actions are framed as heroic. Even the man his romantic interest wants to marry is rich and “not what she would like”.
My best friend and I love this movie, we first saw it with my parents at the drive-in when we were 12, it didn’t really mean anything to us then. But later rewatches gave us even more reasons to love it, as we grew to understand it’s real message— that Julianne only convinced herself she suddenly wanted Michael because she was terrified of being left behind, and of losing her best friend to marriage. That deep, long-lasting friendships are undervalued in our culture at large, often eclipsed by dramatic, intense romantic stuff, and that those deep long-lasting friendships will be the ones that sustain you when romance lets you down.
This kind of reminds me of that How I met your Mother episode with the “Dobler or Dahmer” hypothesis… like the same “grand romantic gesture” can be viewed as either romantic or serial killer creepy depending on the recipient’s perspective of the actions. Dobler, as in the guy who holds the boom box over his head in Say Anything. and Dahmer, as in the serial killer who lobotomized and killed young men, among many other depraved things. So, if you’re into it, that romantic gesture is adorable and romantic like Dobler. But if you’re not into it then that same action immediately becomes stalker-y and creepy, hence a Dahmer. Unfortunately, too many think of themselves as the Dobler in their own “love story,” when they may be actually looking like a straight up Dahmer to their love interest. Anyways, that concept has always stuck with me.
I’m so glad other people like this movie, it’s one of the ones I periodically go back to and rewatch. I’ve always loved that she doesn’t ultimately get the guy and the garbage she does isn’t rewarded, and at the same time, she’s allowed to be a flawed person and feel what she feels. It’s funny, ridiculous, and bittersweet in a way that feels genuine
this movie is my favorite romcom, every time i catch this film on tv i watched it. There’s something about dancing with your gay best friend at the wedding of your friend, who you also love, with the sound of Aretha Franklin and just knowing that you’ll be alright that SENDS ME. This film is a rare film where our protagonist doesn’t get what she wants, but we know it’s okay.
I’m a girl who grew up very uncomfortable with romance movies and I couldn’t figure out why until I got older. Scenes from movies like the notebook, love actually,he just not that into you and ……. Twilight 🙄😒 all frame what these guys did as romantic but let’s face it,it only seems romantic if the girl likes him back, if she doesn’t then everything these guys do is creepy,stalker-ish and low key abusive. Rewatching the notebook as an adult was horrible for me…… He literally got her to go on a date with her buy threatening to kill himself…… 😱 Who does that?!?! They also perpetuate the idea that being treated terrible by a badboy is ok because he loves you & him being controlling/aggressive and jealous is just his way of showing his love. And that a terrible guy will change once he has the love of a good woman. And teenagers and young women eat it up…… Young boys too (there are alot of young people taking their romantic ques from these movies) it’s dangerous and half of these characters give off warning signs of abusive relationships 🤦🏽
I had a guy best friend who I thought we’re perfect for each other. We never confessed; way too chicken shit to say anything. And I am pretty sure it wasn’t one-sided but we chose our friendship first always. He got engaged and quickly got married during covid 2020. This movie makes me look introspectively and tells me to chill. I wish him and his wife the best, truly.
I watched this movie for the first time as an adult after seeing the VHS laying around my house for years; my parents not feeling it was appropriate for me to watch (very conservative). I loved this analysis because I had a very cynical takeaway from the film – I didn’t really feel the main relationships had a lot of on screen chemistry so I had trouble sympathizing with Julianne. But this vid made me re-evaluate and appreciate the subversion in her story. I absolutely loved Rupert Everett’s character and his relationship with Roberts. He carries the movie, imo. Anyway, another perfect vid from an underrated website
I was thinking about this recently (the first few minutes and the impact of romantic films on my love life) because my expectations of how men should behave have all come from shows and movies. And I don’t have high expectations or anything, I just expect someone to show that they care. I expected that if men truly cared, they wouldn’t let “love” slip through their hands. Then I was perusal Emily in Paris and the characters were talking about how the French don’t have happy endings in their movies like Americans do. And my mind shot back to this very depressing French film from the 50s that I watched when I was mid 20s about this married couple that have just a trash relationship and it ended. It left me feeling hurt and broken because I had never seen such an ending to what looked like a romantic film. I kept waiting for things to get better and it didn’t. After that line in Emily in Paris, I realized I hadn’t seen enough of those endings and I finally realized why the ending wasn’t “happy,” but actually more realistic. Not seeing enough examples in my life on how to cope when things don’t go the way we expect it, led to me to feel some trauma through my life from being rejected/ghosted/spurned/mistreated. Seeing so many examples of people in toxic situations and ending it with “at least we love each other and we keep coming back to each other, we’re so happy” and thinking you weren’t in love unless you had daily arguments… I was more critical about those situations but I still allowed some less obvious toxic treatment in my love life.
Wilbur Soot also wrote comedy songs about this in his E Girl Trilogy, Karen Come Back I Miss the Kids, and the Nice Guy Ballad. It’s all satire on guys who think they’re being romantic and the hero by never giving up, but the girl clearly isn’t interested and he’s also hurting himself by not letting himself move on. Also, Your New Boyfriend just slaps in general, would recommend!
i remember perusal this movie and actually paying attention to it sometime in my midteens because my dad has always had a crush on julia robets so he made me watch but this was the first time I actually sat down and listened. i remember being so frustrated with juliane because i wanted her to get the hit so bad! i wanted her to realize what she was doing was wrong and harmful for everyone, even herself. she was making up her own love story out of something that was dead and gone. and i just wanted her to get the hint that i was over and move on, find someone else to pour all that passion over and who would pour it right back. but regardless she kept committing more and more horrible deeds “in the name of love” and i just wanted to pull my hair out. i think i screamed at my screen at some point when my dad left the room lol. she was so frustrating but in sense, i could still relate to the feeling of wanting something you can’t have. all the crushes i had on people around me were a) on friends who eventually got a partner and part of now find them enticing, or b) someone who just suddenly showed up in my dreams for some unknown reason. my crushes never lasted more than a month because it was never anything more than infatuation, and a part of me always felt that that was what juliane was going through too. did she love her friend? yes, but i also think a part of her always knew she was just chasing him because he couldn’t have him anymore. that’s my silly take on this movie!
The “I say a little prayer” scene is the dictionary definition of iconic. Also, what sold me on this movie was the scene where (after all the shit she’s done) she begs him to “pick me” (shout out to the OG pick me girl) and in most movies this would result in her getting the guy, but this movie ends with her having to move on not being picked. Good stuff.
The way my mom is in love with this movie and we constantly repeat that “and who’s chasing you”, well my mom knows the whole movie by heart. Honestly I will defend this movie to death. I can accept certain criticism for it, but never when it is made to be seen as a toxic movie that hasn’t aged well.
I understand that no media exists in a vacuum, and that stories and their framing can, and will, inevitably affect viewers’ mindsets when repeated enough. All of that is completely correct. But I feel in recent years there’s been this attitude towards stories involving romance and sex that says they can’t just be entertainment or comedies or tragedies or power fantasies like any other story gets to be; they also have to guidelines for 100% non problematic healthy relationships, sometimes before anything else. And I just feel like that’s not a super healthy way to interact with stories.
I was mad that she was chasing after a guy WHO WAS A BUTTHOLE! He was dragging her along for the WHOLE. ENTIRE. MOVIE. he was like the king of mixed signals and then he turned around and blamed her for going crazy from all of his manipulative mind games. In conclusion, I don’t think that she was right but he was also extremely wrong. There are just some things you don’t do with someone who you have no feelings for (i.e. slow dancing in a sensual way with them, saying things like “I have seen you in less before” and giving a sly smirk (the part where she was in a bra and underwear after changing), and staring into someone’s eyes like you long for them). He literally said, verbatim, that he had feelings for her when they were in the cab and then he was like confused and disgusted when she finally said that she had feelings for him before the wedding. That man annoyed me to no end I swear.
Still my favorite rom-com precisely because she doesn’t end up with the guy, Michael doesn’t suddenly realize “it’s been Julianne all along’ and yes, the last scene of her with George. Having her meet someone at the reception to potential have her “happy ever after” would have ruined all this movie set up- so glad they changed it.
I hated this movie so much for all of its life (right up until I watched this analysis) because J. Roberts’ character was just so unlikeable. And I really hated that Michael was constantly flirting with her. Like in the most obvious ways he was giving her mixed signals which only encouraged her crappy behaviour. But you reframed it in my mind so thank you for that!.
I’m unsure how I feel on one thing about this movie. I appreciate that you can definitely interpret the story as Julianne feeling like she’s losing her backup plan and chasing Michael because he represented a romantic love and adoration that (until recently) she didn’t have to work for. I do think she cares about him but there are plenty of hints through the movie of why she didn’t pursue him until now. But on the other hand, Julianne is depicted as more career driven and less sentimental. They don’t push her into feminist or “masculine” territory but there’s a hint of something there in the ways she’s contrasted with Kimmy. So are her anxieties those of a woman getting older who missed out on love because she refused to compromise herself? I don’t know… there’s something nebulous there that I’m glad wasn’t made more extreme.
THANK YOU! So many “woke” “think pieces” completely ignore how Julia Roberts is framed in MBFW. The movie knows she’s in the wrong, it shows us, it tells us. How some people compare her to other toxic, won’t-take-no-for-an-answer “romantic leads” is beyond me when she is a clear and clever subversion of the trope. Such a great movie, now I wanna rewatch it lol
Thank you for making me feel frustrated yet again at how much of a wasted opportunity Sierra Burgess is A Loser was. It was so close to being good. It would have been if they had simply gone with an ending similar to My Best Friend’s Wedding. The fact that the movie rewards her shitty behavior by giving her a Romantic Gesture moment is so irritating.
I feel the real reason is that Julianne wasn’t in love with Michael romantically. She was scared because she felt she was being replaced by Kimmy because she was used to it being just her and Michael. When friends enter relationships, we often feel that we are being replaced by that person and the dynamic between friends will often change. She didn’t want her to take her place in his life.
Thank you for making this article. My Best Friend’s Wedding is third on my absolute most favorite movies of all time (of course I have that list) and Julianne’s manipulation taught me from a very young age how NOT to approach relationships. This movie left a mark in me when I was 5 years old and it still moves me to this day. Whenever I bring it up when talking to my mom she always complains that she doesn’t like it because Julianne doesn’t get Michael in the end, and I always tell her she missed the entire point of the movie: you don’t get love through manipulation, and that’s a GOOD THING. It’s so sad to see people missing the point entirely or just simply reducing this movie to a silly-little romantic movie with your ‘typical toxic bs’. This movie deserves so much more recogition for subverting rom-com’s cliches whilst also appealling to a rom-com audience who just wants to have a good time. For some reason I always find myself perusal it when I’m sad, I think it’s because it reminds me that you can’t always get what you want and that’s okay; also because when I feel like a shitty person, Julianne and George remind me that that doesn’t mean I don’t deserve friendship and companionship. It feels like a hug. A bittersweet hug. When I found your article on my home page I literally felt my heart skip a beat because there isn’t enough content on youtube about the absolute brilliance of this movie, so once again I thank you. I hit the subscribe button immediately after the article ended.
My Best Friend’s Wedding is one of my favorite romcoms, I still remember perusal it in theatre with my best friend and leaving the salon singing the songs from the movie in the streets of Ankara. I love the character Julia Roberts is portraying because she has flaws, big ones that you cannot ignore. But you can also see that she is not a bad person, she is not a psychopath. I can emphatize with her even if I cannot imagine myself doing the things she did but none of us is blameless considering the things being done in the name of love even if they are not that extreme. In reality just persistence does not accomplish anything and we all learn that in some way. And this movie is honest about it. So this article made me want to watch the movie again, thanks for the fresh perspective.
I think many hate the movie for Julianne’s character (very immature and hard to watch as an adult, understandable) but it’s actually a good, subversive romcom, at least I enjoyed it for that reason. The guy who plays Roberts’ friend was an important addition to the movie imo. You have a character basically representing the audience and calling out Julianne. So when you watch it, it reassures you that the writers are certainly aware of her bad behavior and that she won’t get rewarded for it. Btw, Diaz’s character was endearing and the karaoke scene was so wholesome, one of my favorites. Having a character get applause for mustering up the courage to sing even if they suck at it, I just love to see it. Wish we had more of that in the media.
My favorite RomCom ever. And though she’s the villain, they have her go through a bunch of the romance beats. My favorite being the grand gesture to win back Kimmy for Michael. Her tracking her down in the ladies room, the fight they have, and her confessing all that she’d done to her. Well, I guess she had two grand gestures. The first being chasing down Michael. Your article is wonderful. Thank you.
Sometimes I wonder whether when people cry “toxic” about certain movies, what they really mean is “I had a very strong cringe response to this, but I’m not willing to admit that that’s the extent of my problem with it — clearly, the movie’s just bad!!” Idk. I like stories like this more as an adult, but man, I can still viscerally remember the intense second-hand embarrassment I felt for Julia Roberts’ character while trying to watch this when I was a kid. 😅
This was fucking excellent! Really good work! I saw my best friends wedding early in my life (like 10 years old) and (Im showing my age here) it was my first very own vhs which i watched often, and it may well have given me a better realistic opinion of romantic love than any other film. This really highlit why. Seriously, thank-you.
Thank you so much for pointing out how framing and context is so crucial in good story telling. I liked this movie as a kid because of that reason and the office and it’s always sunny are two of my favorite comedies and it’s because of the fact that though these people do outlandish things, they aren’t let off the hook just because they’re the main characters. What an excellent article.
Honestly, this is one of my favourite movies, I even have it as DVD but when I tell people they would laugh it off because it’s just a rom-com. But there are many wise words being said. I love the boat scene. Also the “this too shall pass” one. And of course the “who is chasing you?” as well as the ending scene. As someone who experienced unrequited love like Julianne I could relate so much.
My Best Friends Wedding is one of my favourite romantic comedies of all time! Thank you for taking the time to defend it – it’s what it deserves. Also yes, the Say a Little Prayer for You scene is BRILLIANT. The same director made another movie called Muriel’s Wedding which is similar in tone and really amazing, too!
Ahhh omg thank you so much for making a vid about this movie! I saw this for the first time with my mom when I was like seven and it became our favorite movie, I have watched it over and over again through out my life and I always saw Julianne as the “quirky fun girl” and Kimmy as the “perfect girl”, but this movie is so much more complex and the female characters are so much more multi-faceted than that. I watched it again recently as a 28 year old and phew, it hits so differently when you are the age of the characters lol There is so much pressure once you reach a certain age to settle down, have kids etc. and there is no doubt in my mind that Julianne’s character felt that pressure too and was willing to do whatever she thought she had to do in order to have that life. I love that we are moving towards a time where romantic love and friendships and love in general are different and can be framed differently. And I enjoy the ending with her and her friend, I would like to think that was her finding maybe not the love that she wanted but the love that she needed at the time. Sometimes we find that love that we need (platonic friendships) and not the love that we want (romantic love). Which at the time for a rom com was revolutionary, the main character rarely ends up alone. Also I could be wrong but I think it was one of the first films that had an openly gay character being played by an openly gay actor so props for them on that too!
If you want to talk about problematic romantic comedies, the worst offender I’ve ever seen was 50 First Dates. Not only does the movie encourage the “protagonist” Henry to take advantage of Lucy’s mental illness for his own benefit, but the ending flat out rewards him and punishes her. Sure Henry got his dream girl, but Lucy is basically stuck in a never ending nightmare. She’ll spend the rest of her life forgetting a family she had, she’ll never be able to build memories with her kids, her kids will always be sad by the idea that their mom will always forget them (and all the good time these had) a day later, and on top of that she’ll have to be completely dependent on Henry since she’ll never be able to hold down a job. Also, at the risk of being morbid, I don’t know how loyal Henry will be once Lucy looses her looks and her condition worsens with age. It would’ve been less creepy if the movie ended with Lucy’s short term memory loss getting magically cured. If 50 First Dates was from Lucy’s perspective, it would be a goddamn horror movie.
During the 2020 summer while being stuck at home I decided to give some older 80s and 90s rom-com/”fluff” movies a watch for the first time. As Yhara mentioned, I watched them as a ✶27 year old lady✶ and thought “huh, this is kinda messed up” for most of them but two stood out. My Best Friend’s Wedding & The Best Man (funny how they both involve weddings & relationships between friends with unresolved histories). Both movies do a great job showcasing flawed main characters who both behave badly but show the very human experience of doing something wrong and dealing with the fall-out (and the hope that we will become better people who learn from our mistakes).
This is one of my favorite movies. I have it, the Wedding Singer and others on VHS and which I refuse to let go. Julia Roberts was the bigger movie star at the time and it was a good, unexpected surprise that bad girl Jules didn’t get the guy. I have watched this movie several times and it’s one where I know many of the lines. Although Jules and Kimmy didn’t become real friends I enjoyed the scenes with Julia and Cameron. perusal Jules and George dance at the end is a scene I have watched over and over. It would have been nice if Philip Ingram’s great version of Say a Little Prayer at the wedding reception was longer. Your commentary on this article was excellent.
I remember perusal this movie when I was younger and just absolutely hating it. As an adult, I watched Muriel’s Wedding (same director) and decided to rewatch My Best Friend’s Wedding. I feel completely different about it. Julia’s character felt much more relatable and I cried at the end scene with her friend. Honestly, the movie deserves more praise.
agree 100% with your reading of this film. i always use this movie as a barometer if someone is in their right mind when it comes to rom coms because the movie clearly knows julianne is kind of the villain from the start. i guess, she is the anti heroine. this is the rom com version of the wings of the dove. i think it’s one of the best movies of the nineties.
This made me think of Days of Summer. I don’t know what your thoughts on that movie are and I’m sure a bunch of people have commented on this article about it, but the idea of romance is verses what we interpret it to be from rom coms and stuff is explored in the movie. Joseph Gordon Levitt always brings up how the main character in the movie was more flawed than people want to think he is. The difference between MBFW and this one I guess is that in 500 Days, we see the main character over time realize the error in his way and grow whereas with MBFW, she kinda realizes it in the span of those few days (or I guess hours lol). Loved this article and this movie!
Now I would NEVER chase after a man who is about to get married but I did chase after a man I loved back in college who was verbally abusing me, using me, and would NEVER love me. He moved on to the girl he really wanted after he was done using me. I did relate to her chasing after a man while no one was chasing her. I felt that. What’s ironic though is that I met my current boyfriend who chose me through the guy I use to love.
My favorite Rom-Com is Something Gotta Give. It might have its problems but is not as toxic as some Rom-Coms are. Harry actually works to be a better person and I love Erica so much she has a lot of personality and she might a full-grown person, but she is willing to explore. And she cries a lot for Harry, but she doesn’t mope around that much.
It’s such a good lesson but I’m often left with a burning question; now what ? I acknowledge the myth of persistence is wrong and I wouldn’t even want someone to love me because I manipulated them in to it. But once I’ve accepted it’s not going to happen,then what? I’m just left with feelings that where allegedly supposed to go away but I haven’t felt that way about anyone else since and anytime I think there’s a chance there isn’t,it’s just another ending as dead as the last one. Honestly not sure if I can keep doing this. Anyway great article as always can’t wait for the next one.
This is such a helpful article for me right now. Me and my boyfriend broke up a few weeks ago but we still talk everyday and i have been holding out hope that we will get back together but i just dont think he feels the same, or at least hes not in the right place in life for a relationship. I think i need to cut off contact because my mentality about it is just not right and it hurts me on a daily basis but i also feel like im gonna blow up on him one of these days so its not good for him either. My mom is kinda enabling me even though she doesn’t like him because she keeps saying im not ready to cut him off. I feel like shes right because i have like 0 closure but i also feel like i dont have another choice. I will always wonder what could happen if we keep in contact, but if i end it completely then i will have no choice but to move on
I remember when I saw this movie I didn’t like it. It was torturous to me perusal her do the worst thing time after time as I screamed at her internally. BUT… …Whether it not it’s a good movie, I didn’t learn the lesson I should have taken from it. Years later I pursued a girl I’d met in a city two hours drive away. I decided to do the “gifts from a secret admirer” thing because movies had told me it was romantic. Heck, numerous female friends (most of whom loved romcoms) TOLD me it was romantic when I described what I was doing. But the girl I liked rejected me before I had a chance to reveal my identity, saying she didn’t like the anonymous approach. And yet I didn’t give up. I intended to identify myself at a big annual event we both attended. Thankfully, I didn’t go through with the sweeping gestures I had planned. They weren’t set to be on stage or anything, but she would have been extremely embarrassed nonetheless. I have since met a different girl who ended up being my ACTUAL future wife, and we’re now happily married. I have performed some sweeping gestures for her, e.g. a grand proposal at Disneyland, but — here’s the important part — she KNEW it was coming, and I KNEW what her answer would be, because she told me beforehand. I will miss theatrical romcoms. But to be honest, the dating world will probably be better for their absence. They messed up my romantic expectations AND the expectations of a number of girls that I actually DID end up dating. It’s a miracle I didn’t end up in a bad marriage.
You know this addresses a pet peeve I have formed while reading manga/manhua/manhwa. They have the unrequited love person who ultimately gets rejected but like clockwork, they get a consolation love interest. First, if you are already interested in this new person then you couldn’t have been that in love to begin with to get over it that fast. Second, you didn’t actually get over it any way you were forced to give up because the person you wanted chose someone else.
one thing i love about this movie is that when i first watched it i was sorta rooting for julianne, but as the film progressed and her actions were never portrayed as good and you saw how desperate and toxic (…?) she got you realize the message and thats why i love it because it successfully shows you how fucked up these things are. i also like how they made kimmy a literal angel and how sweet she was because theres always this trope where women are catty and rude to eachother over a man but kimmy trusted michael and although felt threatened by julianne, was never rude to her (unless she was ran to her limit like in the bathroom scene)
I watched this movie for the first time just recently like a year or two ago, and I loved it for the subversion of having the mc not get rewarded for her persistence in a fruitless love. And shortly after perusal it, I went looking for articles about people talking about it or articles. I would find several praising the movie for the same reasons I liked it, but I often found many somewhat recent articles saying how bad this movie was for the mc being awful and toxic. It made me wonder if people understood the point of it? Or maybe people were just too used to feel good romcoms where the mc gets the happy ending. I think the movie holds up so well even now and I wonder if me perusal it now as opposed to closer to when it came out plays a part in why I like it? Also, wow I didn’t know about the alternate ending and I’m so glad they didn’t go through with it.
Random fact but there’s actually a Bollywood version of this movie, where they switched the genders so it’s a guy best friend perusal the girl marry another dude. They ended up changing the plot so by the end he gets the girl and idk, but I did not like it especially cus the other dude (Jimmy Shergil) was so handsome (I was a superficial child when I watched it) Edit (the album if the movie was amazing)
My Best Friend’s Wedding is what happens when you get put in the “friend’s zone”. When a person is in love with a friend who does not love them back, that has got to hurt. I knew a guy who was in that sort of situation. He’s almost 40 now and works a dead end job. Don’t be that creep who thinks your friend will leave their SO for you.
EXACTLY! this film is NOT like the films people lump in as ‘woah that was fucked up and we didn’t realise’, because unlike the others she doesnt get rewarded for it. so many of those films still have the guy get the girl (also with his friends egging him on too, unlike this one like you said where rupert everett tells her it’s wrong)
This article is GREAT! You are definitely one of the better movie commentary websites I’ve come across. Your editing is visually interesting, which is super important to me. I do, however, have one suggestion. If it were at all a possibility for you, I suggest you narrate with a little more… vigor. Really let yourself go and have fun. You sound like you’re terrifiedly whispering in a closet so the murderer won’t hear you.
I think the only thing that doesn’t work is Michael. Dermot Mulroney has been great in other things, but he just doesn’t have enough charm to justify to the audience, this level of lunacy. Forget Julianne’s schemes. The fact that 20-year-old Kimmy is leaving college and a career as an architect to just follow her sportswriter beau around and her family is cool with it, seems nuts. He just isn’t compelling and doesn’t seem to have a great deal of enthusiasm for Kimmy, to make this believable.
Jules in My Best Friends Wedding is the best, she is the villain, but she is the best and you are rooting for her to break them up. She’s so flawed, and so in denial and it’s so refreshing and nearly 20 years later I still can’t think of another female character like her. Personally… I think she should have a sex change and become a gay man and ended up with George cos my god I love him so much!
I used to never be bothered by typical romcom shenanigans be it is just “movie shorthand” and “people are not going to act like that in real life” until I went to visit my cousin who had gotten married to a man in an other country that most people there have arranged marriages and I met her new brother-in-law. In just a day after meeting him he was under the impression we were dating and were going to get married someday (this country also has a very strong sense of hospitality so him taking me to see different parts of his city was not out of the ordinary so even though I could tell that he was interested in me I did not realize what fully going on). It turns out he had assumed that western dating worked like it did in western movies. I was super awkward having to breakup with someone you weren’t even dating after trying to be upfront several times.
You missing such a BIG point about it too… the need of romantic love – and what Is „ Love” … she ends up with someone she loves – her best friend… it’s such a Amoristic positiv Movie and makes you thinking about do we really need the classic love that society is dictating us to search ? Julia felt in love with her best friend because they both thought that should… that Movie Is way more then just a ducking romcom, it’s beyond relevant and will be it even more while our image of relationships and love changes
I saw this definitely under the romcom genre but I really wanted MBFW to create a subgenre of “not getting the guy but being happy about it” Too many of us know the reality of that and it would be great to see more movies like that And i will say im surprised Hollywood didn’t turn out a bunch of copycat films.
Thank you! I was waiting for what you said at 15 minutes and if you didn’t I was going to bring it up. Isn’t it interesting how women can do something horrible (which is fair but) we are hated for it, and then a man can do the same and it’s deemed romantic and not in any way bad behavior. All the weird excuses…Boys will boys and boo hoo “Nice” guys never get the girl 🤢 I haven’t searched your articles yet. Do you have one on the “friend zone” troupe?
The worst example of the stalking being romantic is a movie called ” The pick-up artist” starring Robert Downey Jr. and Molly Ringwald. She sleeps with him once and then he proceeds to harass her at work, follow her to her house and involve himself in her problems. It’s absolutely horrible what’s even worse is that the writer and director was a real life sexual abuser and abused numerous women in Hollywood including Selma Blair, it made me physically sick
I’m neutral on romance I don’t love it and I don’t avoid it like the plague but “you’re ever getting rid of me” from Waitresses The Musical horrifies me on a primal level and I was so sure it was satire at first because of how cartoonishly stalkerish he sounds but if apparently it’sromantic because we’ve hear dawn sing about just being scared of emotional intamicy but he didn’t here that and isn’t shown to have an above average ability to read social cues. Like he comes in to her place of work after 1 date that was cut short, refuses to leave, trowns about money to manipulating her into feeling bad if she kicks him out before he’s paid for everyone, creates a scene putting all the attention on her so she’ll do anything to make it stop and goes on a concerning rant about how he emotionally wore down a cat into loving him and took all of it’s warning signs of aggression and discomfort as som sort of game and in Rita toon to violate boundaries. Like he doesn’t slowly and carefully show the cat it can trust him and let it get acclimatised to him no he barrels head first in to coming off as aggressive and predatory as possible. Like if her co-workers respected her bondries they wouldn’t have kicked him out but because the co-workers deem the, a good match they push her towards the unhinged stalker. Like Jenna has first hand experience of Lovebimbing in abusive relationship and how things can start of seeming nice but it’s all part of the abuse cycle and don’t seem to throw up a single red flag… I have went on to long of a rant I’ll stop
I don’t blame people for not knowing this was calling out the toxic imagery of romance because how can you tell it a part from the romance that does the exact same thing? And there’s always this main character syndrome where people will just side with the protagonist or expect to because they’re supposed to be the victim or hero of the story (ie. Joker or Bojack Horseman).
What about the “prince charming” of this movie, who’s a total dick who flirts with his ex days before his wedding, screams on his fiancé in a public place, and get her to give up school to follow him around ? What about Kimmy who has so little personnality and sense of self that she is ready to turn into jello or creme brulé to keep a guy, even though she says many times that she does what to get her diploma and have a life of her own ? How are Kimmy and Mickael not the ultimate toxic relationship ?
Yeah the movie is a great how not to win the guy. It’s only when she stops being insane and steps up to be the best man. Realizes she’s wrong and being destructive then does the right thing. Takes responsibility. Owns up admits everything apologizes. Helps them get together and wears the ugly dress to the wedding where she jokes about the whole horrible thing. She became a person we could even believe is worth being a friend with. It’s so gross how she flirts with the Dad, the little brother and friends of the guy she’s ment to love… that scene was always disturbing. Like what?! That boy isn’t legal so she’s known him since he was a baby and she grinds on him as a joke? Crazy yuck!
Rom coms would eventually hit a wall. It doesn’t help that there is a large media group that loves to point out fiction is unrealistic, unhealthy, and problematic. Yeah we know. We dont watch Pretty woman or Princess Diaries for realism or role models or political statements. We watch to be entertained and I think there is a reason why these media groups are going out of business, and laying off employees
Enjoy your obvious passion for great films. I was a teen when alot of these films came out, and i loved them. Movies I’ve watched never influenced how lived and viewed the world. There not real life. That’s what makes films great, right? I’ve gotten so irritated over the past years perusal films and shows raked over the social coils for “not aging well” being “toxic “. I know the early 2000’s where somewhat harmful behind the scenes, but i must say movies made between 2000-2015ish seemed entirely more entertaining. To me anyway