Arranged marriage is a cultural belief that has been prevalent in various cultures, including the Indian Subcontinent, Oriental Culture, and Islam. It is more common in Islamic and Indian societies, with the Vedas being an ancient text that connects romance to marriage choices in non-European societies. In these cultures, marriage partners are primarily selected by others, such as parents, respected elders, family members, or matchmakers.
The reasons for arranged marriages can be cultural or religious, with reasons such as religious or cultural issues, wealth preservation, or political alliances. In some cultures, girls are married to gods and live in temples, while in others, divorce carries more shame. Cultural-religious conflations can be especially common among immigrants moving outside of Pakistan, who struggle to retain their culture and religion while being away from their country of origin.
In some Islamic countries and among migrants from Muslim countries to other parts of the world, consanguineous arranged marriages are common and culturally preferred. However, they are culturally forbidden or considered undesirable in most Christian, Hindu, and Buddhist societies.
In Islam, arranged marriages are not just based on luck and guessing who might make the best potential partners. In many cultures, mate-selection is considered physically and mentally risky, shameful, and burdensome for the young.
In some cultures, choice and love are sometimes part of contemporary arranged marriages, even if the forms of marriage may be followed for traditional purposes.
📹 My child want’s to marry outside our race/culture – Mufti Menk
So you moved to an environment which is mixed with so many nationalities and races yet your child must only marry within your …
Is an arranged marriage and example of cultural relativism?
Religious beliefs and arranged marriages are examples of cultural relativism. Some religions and marriages are acceptable in some cultures but not in others. But this doesn’t mean people can criticize each other’s practices. They just accept them as they are.
Is arranged marriage a cultural thing?
An arranged marriage is when two people of similar cultural backgrounds are married by their parents or a third party. Arranged marriages are part of many cultures. They make sense when it comes to marriage and are affected by culture and money. Arranged Marriages in Countries and Cultures Arranged marriage is most common in eastern cultures, including India, Japan, and China. But it was also popular in the West. In the Elizabethan era, parents in high society often arranged marriages to maintain their children’s economic status and bloodlines. Parents of the bride would often offer their daughter to the son of a family with the same economic status.
Marriage in the Arab World: A report about marriage in Arab culture.
Why is marriage cultural?
Marriage is a union between a man and a woman that is regulated by laws, rules, and customs. It gives the partners rights and duties and status to their offspring. Marriage is a universal institution because it provides structure for many basic social and personal functions. These include sexual gratification and regulation, division of labor between the sexes, economic production and consumption, and personal needs for affection, status, and companionship. Marriage is also about having children, taking care of them, and teaching them how to behave. Marriages have taken many forms over time. (See exchange marriage, group marriage, polyandry, polygamy, and tree marriage. See also common-law marriage.
Jim Obergefell in a convertible at the San Francisco Gay Pride Parade on June 28, 2015. That year he was the plaintiff in a Supreme Court case that made same-sex marriage legal. By the 21st century, the meaning of marriage in Western countries had changed. In 2000, the Netherlands became the first country to legalize same-sex marriage. It went into effect on April 1, 2001. Many other countries followed suit, including Canada, France, the United States, and Germany. Some countries also gave same-sex couples benefits and obligations through registered partnerships or civil unions. These terms meant different things in different contexts.
What is more example of cultural relativism?
Culture shows how a group thinks, acts, and sees the world. In some countries, it’s okay to stare at or stand close to others in public. In South Africa, if there’s only one person on a bus or in a movie theater, it’s polite to sit next to them. In a recent study of Greyhound bus trips in the US, researchers found that the unspoken rule is that if other seats are available, one should never sit next to another person. Many passengers said it makes you look strange. These are examples of cultural norms. Your norms are just different. Imagine going to a movie in a foreign country and not sitting next to the only person in the theater. Another person tells you off for being rude. You feel confused and anxious because you’re not used to these norms. This is culture shock. Have you ever tried food from another country and thought it was weird? This is ethnocentric! You judge other cultures based on your own. You judge or assume about food from other countries based on your own beliefs. Thinking “dried squid is smelly” or “people shouldn’t eat insects” is ethnocentric. Is ethnocentrism good or bad? Ethnocentrism can lead to negative judgments of groups or societies. It can lead to discrimination. Many countries discriminate against religious minorities. Ethnocentrism can also make people loyal to their own social group. For example, during the World Cup or Olympics, you may root for your country and believe that its players or teams are better. National pride is also part of ethnocentrism.
What is culturally arranged marriage?
Culturally arranged marriages are made by people who are not part of the marriage. For example, a family member may arrange the marriage for the couple.
Until November 2019, the marriage ceremony had to take place in New Zealand. If the marriage ceremony took place offshore, the couple was not eligible for a Culturally Arranged Marriage Visitor Visa. In November 2019, the rules changed so that people in a culturally arranged marriage outside New Zealand could get the visa.
Is marriage social or cultural?
Marriage is a cultural universal. It serves important social functions and is shaped by social norms. Because marriage is a social construct, cultural norms and expectations determine what a marriage is and who can marry. In some societies, marriage requires religious and/or civil approval. In others, couples may be considered married just by living together. Marriage ceremonies, rules, and roles may differ from one society to another, but marriage is a cultural universal. It is a social institution in all cultures.
Marriage serves many purposes. In most societies, marriage helps children know who their parents and relatives are. It also regulates sexual behavior, transfers, preserves, or consolidates property, prestige, and power. Most importantly, it is the basis for the family.
What are five examples of cultural relativism?
5 Best Examples: Opposing the Universal Declaration of Human Rights. … Female genital mutilation. … Breastfeeding in public. … Child Labor. … Eating habits. Cultural relativism is a way of thinking about cultural differences that doesn’t judge other cultures based on your own values. People are expected to not judge other cultures.
Relativism says that truth, goodness, or beauty depend on different beliefs and cultures. There are no universal standards for judging truth, goodness, or beauty. Gairdner says cultural relativism is relativism applied to groups of people. It means:
What is the difference between traditional and religious marriage?
Catherine is a Christian. She is a member of the church and a minister. Her position comes with responsibility and expectations from church leaders. All was well until last year when she and her boyfriend held an introduction ceremony and started living together. This was not in line with church principles and would cause the congregation to question her morals. The church elders and pastors advised the couple against staying together. The couples’ families blessed the union, but the pastors said that God doesn’t recognize customary marriage. So, Catherine and her husband live together and don’t have visitors for fear of being found out and reported to church leaders. The fight between religious and customary marriages has been going on for a long time. Debates about this keep going on. Some couples believe that a customary marriage is more blessed by their families, while a religious marriage is blessed by God. Most people say that both blessings are important and that choosing one leaves the other pending. Francis Okweda, a relationship counselor and creator of “The Sober Love Test,” a relationship tool that helps you choose the right partner, says, “Every tribe, nationality, or ethnicity has its own cultural practices.” The church has its own culture, with values that represent God’s kingdom. Not everything outside the church is against God’s word.Most cultures see marriage as complete in itself. The introduction ceremony (kwanjula) or okuhingira in Ankole is a complete marriage. A government-conducted marriage is also a civil marriage. “A marriage conducted by a church or mosque is also a religious marriage,” Okweda says. He adds that people who have each type of marriage think the others are incomplete. “If you only do the customary marriage, some in the church might consider you unmarried,” Okweda says.
Expenses a hindrance Today’s marriage ceremonies are expensive and demanding, especially for young couples like Catherine and her husband, who only want a legal union. Many people don’t value a cheap wedding. Okweda says people should not worry about the cost because a church marriage only needs the couple, two witnesses, and a pastor.
Is marriage not a religious institution?
In the United States, marriage is both religious and civil. No matter what, the state must give a couple a marriage license. With that license, they get benefits like tax breaks, medical coverage, and more. The government gives these benefits, not a church. We have seen several recent legal victories on the marriage front. Proposition 8 is gone, and Washington Governor Chris Gregoire signed legislation making her state the seventh to recognize same-sex marriage. The National Organization for Marriage (NOM) led by Maggie Gallagher opposes same-sex marriage. They offer downloadable brochures in Spanish and English, but only for Catholics, Protestants, or Jews. Below are two points from NOM materials. 1) The government didn’t create marriage and shouldn’t change it.
Why do some cultures believe in arranged marriages?
Arranged marriages have been common in many societies, including small African villages, India, the UK, and medieval Europe. They were often done to make alliances, avoid inbreeding, and keep children safe.
📹 Sadhguru on Marriage – Choosing Consciously
Why does the institution of marriage exist, and what role does it play in human life and societies? Sadhguru answers a question …
My husband is white (Irish and French) and I am black. We are both born and raised in America. Our parents are too. My parents are the ones who objected to us being together. His parents were more than okay with him wanting to be with me. My husband and his parents are from Massachusetts which is north in the US and my parents and I are from Georgia which is south in the US. My parents objected because of the experience they had and things they seen in the South when they were kids. My Dad didn’t have good things to say about white people because of his experience as a child and his mother’s experience. My dad eventually warmed up to the idea and gave him a chance. My husband and I are still together 15 years later. He is so amazing. I learned that my parents based their initial decision off of their experiences with white people and that they weren’t just trying to enforce what they wanted on me nor were they trying to be mean. May Allah bless those seeking marriage with good believing spouses. May he guide us all and help us in our decisions.
I tried to talk to my dad and mom about marrying an American/Hispanic. They refused it he talked to my dad my brother and 2 of my uncles to try to get them to see the good in him and no one gave him a chance.. I married him without their consent.. it’s years later now my mother loves him he’s a great Muslim better than some of my own born Muslim cousins. He made me wear my hijab and is making me a better Muslim overall. However a lot of my family was talking really bad about me some of my family still don’t talk to me to this day
In my first marriage, he was the same nationality as me. I was pushed to marry him and every red flag I saw, I was told I am being ridiculous. In the end he was a liar, cheater, used me to come to America, just a big disgrace to humankind. I divorced him less than 1 year of marriage. I knew in my heart something was wrong and all I could do was pray to Allah. If I survived those dark times it was through my faith in Allah. I didn’t know it at the time but Allah had better plans for me. 3 years after that I met my now husband. He is not the same nationality as me but the same religion. Elhamdilillah I have 2 beautiful babies with this wonderful man. I truly feel blessed. For anyone suffering out there please do you duas, keep faith in Allah. It will all make sense one day. May Allah bless you all.
I always had an issue with people saying you do it the wrong way first and then try to halalize it. Ask yourself why your child couldn’t come forward about it to you in the beginning? What made them fear your reaction? Why did you push them to take the haram route? When you have a good relationship with your child where respect is given both ways, where you try to understand your child and the world it lives in, when your child knows that you will give them the best advice for their happiness and not your reputation in your community then they will come clean with things from the start, then they will do it the halal way. It’s easy to blame children for their wrong doings but it’s hard to ask why they went that route. Respectfully to Menk tho love him may Allah bless him.
MashAllah. I thank you for this as I am having problems with obtaining my mother’s blessing to my choice in spouse. I am being called Jahil for wanting to marry someone who is a non Muslim but is willing to convert. I am not perfect but i want to be better Muslim everyday. May Allah SWT ease my troubles and May my mother slowly become open minded. Aamin
A nice girl proposed to me which was shocking since usually it’s the opposite. She is Arab and I’m East African. Things quickly went down hill when her mother intervened after she said she will approve. Not saying Arabs are racist but that’s what happened. I was considered a son to her mother growing up but after her daughter wanted to marry me, I became an outsider.
I always love to listen to you Mufti Menk. Because I love to learn as much as possible. In particular from an individual who knows much more than I do. But, with all do respect Mufti Menk, for the first time I feel a little disagreement due to my way of thinking conserning the reality of my life in relation to western woman up to a normal human (interaction) degree. In this case Dutch woman, because after all I live in The Netherlands. I don’t know what it is. But their body language and the look in their eyes is so clear as possible. Even if I don’t have the attention to behave in a not human way, I’m a gentleman, they think weird. Maybe, because I’m a muslim and they heard and saw a lot in the media, maybe for some other inhuman reason. Fact is that I can’t have a Dutch woman as my wjfe, because we are not on the same human level. Respecting eachother is a basic factor. So, the Moroccan or Arabic woman is much better for me. This is, just like a lot of Moroccan men who do have the same thoughts, my opinion.
A friend of mine met a pakistani woman who asked him to come see her parents. The parents were preparing to meet with him until allegedly the woman told her parents that the man she’s met is BLACK. The meeting was called off. In hindsight, i told him not to waste his time so I wasn’t shocked. Ps: this guy is one of the most devout muslim men I’ve ever met in my life.
I was declined by my parents because I was going to marry a Christian woman. She was ready to take Shahadah but my parents blocked it because of their cultural beliefs. They couldn’t accept a woman from who was Black from Jamaica. Basically my parents stopped me from getting a taste of Jannah. But InshaAllah I strive everyday to get there no matter what.
Ya Arhamar Rohimiin Allahumma solli ‘ala Muhammad. Semoga Allah meredhai kita semua, Semoga taufiq dan hidayah Allah sentiasa bersama kita setiap detiknya dan Semoga Allah sentiasa memandang kita dengan pandangan Rahmat dan Kasih SayangNya, Aamiin Allahumma Aamiin, wa shalallahu ‘ala sayyidinaa Muhammad wa ‘ala alihi wasohbihi wasallam, walhamdulillahi robbil ‘alamiin.
Probably the best hadith you’ll ever hear 🤯 Aws bin Aws narrated: Allah’s Messenger said to me: “Whoever performs Ghusl on Friday, and bathes completely, and goes early, arriving early, gets close and listens and is silent, there will be for him in every step he take the reward of a year of fasting and standing (in prayer). At-Tirmidhi Sahih hadith
The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said: “Whoever constantly seeks forgiveness (from Allāh) (saying “astaghfirullāh | أستغفر اللّٰه”), Allāh will appoint for him a way out of every distress and a relief from every anxiety, and will provide sustenance for him from from sources he does not expect.” (Abū Dawūd) Make it a constant habit to say Astaghfirullāh | أستغفر اللّٰه (I seek forgiveness from Allāh) with a sincere heart and you’ll see the blessings and positive effects of that habit in your daily life. We have witnessed people being relieved from the darkest and most difficult of situations through this habit, others who were blessed with unimaginable wealth and blessings through this habit, and others whose hearts found contentment and true happiness through this habit. May Allāh ‘Azza Wa Jall make us of those who continuously seek His forgiveness and accept from us – āmeen God bless you 🇲🇺
Marrying someone with a different cultural or ethnic background isn’t going to be without any problems. Just a simple example even a Muslim couple of Arabic background but from two differing Arabic countries like from from Algeria and Palestine will have to deal with difficulties at the beginning. From using different words for the same thing or different dishes or or or the list is long but both will have to learn to deal with it and to take a bit from the others “plate of life” always keeping in mind that their Imaan is uniting them and that their marriage is a blessing from Allah swt to bring out Insha’allah a better and open minded new generation of Muslims who think of the whole idea of Islam instead of national or cultural aspects.
Bismillah Subhanallah Insya Allah my father won’t object about it. As long as he is a good muslim, good character and conduct, responsible. It’s the membrance to be passed. Skill of communication will be needed… My father knows almost all my friends since I was little… He is a friendly one. It soon would be found out when having conversation. He is wise, clever, adl, and firm. He would ask where would I live..for instance…. And common questions as the duty of a father…. He would be found a pleasant one to talk. Not to listen to others’ point of view.
In Malaysia, mix marriage is normal. Be it Muslims or non-Muslims. Big family of my friend will gather for Chinese New Year, Aidilfitri, Deepavali & Christmas because their family is so diverse, but they can live in harmony. That is one thing I love about Malaysia. Alhamdulillah, this is all from Allah.
I have been told by Arab muslim men – I am not good enough for marriage because i have dark skin and my race is not Arab – hence I am not worthy of marriage to them because they are racially superior. I have also encountered other groups of muslims who feel superior based on their skin colour or nationality. I am not saying all muslims are like this . But as a practicing muslim lady – i find racism among muslims to be the worst. This is very sad. ☹
Sir I lost my parents passed away last year im finding difficult to lead my life I’m a Christian im a working women i found a person who truly loves me an cares for me he is a Muslim I’m gaining the trust on Allah i need ur prayers for me i don’t know how to convince the parents of the boy i just don’t need him i need his mom an dad as well i don’t know how to approach his parents I’m scared if they will accept me or not please i need ur prayers sir 😭😭😭😭
I think the settlement is a better thing to note, most of the time the outer caste people don’t want to be the part of the spouse family, especially the wife she wants to prefer her family or caste rather than to be part of her husband’s family and then the children are confused to which side they should go paternal or maternal, so when a woman from your tradition or culture come to your life she can understand what is going on in her husband’s family or how she would foster the next generation
يأيها الناس أن خلقنكم من ذكرو أنثى و جعلنكم شعوبا و قبايل لتعارفو ان أكرمكم عن اللة اتقكم ان اللة عليم خبير. سورة حجزت ١٣؛٤٩ “O mankind, Allah has created all of you from a male and a female, and made you into national and tribes so that you may recognize one another. However, the best among you in the sight of Allah is the one who is the most pious. Allah is All-knowing and All-aware.” Al Hujurat (49:13)
British Jamaican revert and husband is British Algerian/French. Very thankful Alhamdullilah that my Mother in Law has been the most welcoming person ever. ❤❤ Not once felt out of place and I love mixing our cultures together 😊 Definitely agree though that culture does take precedence over religion sometimes, and it shouldn’t. But let that not deter you from the person you love 🙏🏾 Sometimes people are just scared of things they do not understand
Unite humanity and be an Earthling. You have the mindset, of wher ever yo live or were brought up,in the mindset. Mindset is only, when you live and what you are forced to believe. Belief is Faith. It is our belief, named whatever, we have nothing,of trueness but Faith. Given in our existence as true but was as we were ordered in life, to believe as true was true
So glad my family is accepting. My aunt married a part West-Indian part Egyptian Muslim man. Completely different culture, language and race but my Grandparents were accepting of him as they talked to him, found him well mannered and nice. He is genuinely such an amazing man. People need to look beyond caste, culture and race when it comes to their children’s happiness.
But in my short experience I found people who speak arabic (native) feel superior over us (Bangladeshi). I feel so bad being Muslim and Bangladeshi at the same time for them. Our beliefs are same but they just reject us for ethnicity, they neglect us for ethnicity. That all bring us our language movement and liberation war on 71. I wish Allah could show them we are not bad muslim. They are too proud that almost all of the messengers and great people in Islam born in arab, arabic region. There are no bad Muslims just for language, and culture. I am Muslim too and I born in Bangladesh.
Well I dont know what to do. I am 30 year old female and my parents won’t allow me to get married, my mother says I have to stick with her forever she is too attached to me and my sister ( she is 32 and unmarried still living at home) I do love my mum but I think she is being incredibly selfish, because my dad doesn’t care for her she think its her children responsibly to be the husband, she refuses to see the truth.
I am black and his Dad doesn’t want a black woman for him. He tried with Arab women before but it didn’t work. His parents want him to get married but he doesn’t want to marry whoever. He is not happy and I can’t understand how muslims can think like that. Is a black person bad or lower than them? I am a muslim like them.
I am converting my beloved partner to Islam, and she is so astonished by the words of Allah that she accepted it. We always go for Friday prayer, and Alhamdullilah she has learned how to wear the Hijab, and learn how to follow the prayers. However, my parents despise that I cannot marry her since she is Latina, and I am Bengali. This is nonsense.. she has the biggest heart to the point where she buys things for my mother and father.. and STILL my father and mother isn’t INTERESTED in her at all. I am so conflicted in this moment where I am making someone who has a big heart into Muslim, and yet she she sees these things and ask me.. if they were REAL Muslims.. why are they acting with such HATE? I cannot sleep at night due to this. It’s been troubling me, as I believe someone who is going to the path towards ALLAH should never be hated, and the DUNYA is much bigger than Bangladesh! TELL ME WHAT CAN I DO? I am going crazy …
DONT AUTOMATICALLAY ASSUME YOUR SIGNFICANT OTHER WILL BECOME A ISLAM IN FACT IT IS FAR MORE LIKELY THEY MAY DRAG YOU FURTHER AWAY FROM THE LORD ALLAH IT EASIER TO DRAG SOMEONE DOWN THAN TO PULL SOMEONE UP BUT U MUST BELIEVE IN ALLAH AND NOT LET THEM PULL U DOWN AND ALSO PULL THEM UP SO THEY CAN SERVE ALLAH ALMIGHTY AND ONLY HIM AMEN
I’m a Malaysian Muslim man and I want to come to NYC to marry an American Muslim woman someday! If you think that I’m doing it for a green card, you’re wrong! Instead of relocating to USA, I want to bring her home because I want to introduce her to the beauty of Malaysia, especially since I choose to work as an ambulance driver! May Allah give ease to both of us!
And what about marrying outside our religion? We keep saying the world evolved and plenty of comments here speak of love having no race; love is love and you’re not in full control of who you fall in love with. You may try falling out of love with them knowing it’s a sin and the consequences of damaging your relationship with your parents and other muslim sisters & brothers, but the truth is you can never stop loving someone you’re truly in love with. I’m a Muslim myself but one thing I can’t seem to digest is why’s it so hard for people to accept a healthy, loving and mature couple both with respectable family backgrounds. We’re so adamant about how haram interfaith marriages are unless we are able to make our loved one convert to Islam, isn’t that selfish? Why is marrying someone outside your religion so wrong when they respect you and your religion while you can equally respect theirs? We’re afterall all children of the same God (Allah), sadly history and different eras of every prophet gave rise to different stories; believers of one religion are now anti polar to the so called non-believers . Religion was created to bring peace amongst one another but it’s indirectly dividing us all I love Islam with every inch and more through mufti menk, but this is one thing I can’t wrap my head around, respect always comes both ways.
Marrying in another culture is not such a good idea. The reason being lots of miscommunication. Miscommunication doesn’t hurt when times are good, but when times are hard miscommunication makes a difficult situation worse. Another problem with marrying in another culture is that one culture will have to take a back seat. After few years the spouse whose culture took a back seat starts longing for their culture and it triggers a sense of sacrificing more for the marriage. As a result chances of such marriages breaking down is higher.
To be honest it’s not about racism. Some people are so accustomed to their own culture, food, and language that even if they end up marrying outside of their race/culture their spouse will struggle to adapt. A lot of young people see marriage with rose colored glasses w/o thinking about the how practical differences can break down a marriage. For the most part mixed marriages require more work and most end up in divorce. So think about everything and perhaps realize its better to stick to familiar culture instead of globe trotting and marrying anyone just because they are Muslim.
Please read up on the rules of Kafa’ah, marriage is not always recommended between incompatible couples (for obvious reasons) and the incompatibility can arise from language, culture, creed, race and even from economic disparity. There is a reason why most interracial marriage end up in divorce. The best way to deal with this type of situation is to use common sense and sound judgement. Always remember marriage is not just a union between two persons, it’s a union between two families. Marriage between two different race means you are about to bridge between two nations, which is an astoundingly difficult feat to achieve, don’t be too confident about yourself and overestimate your capability, be realistic. Do not sacrifice your family integrity for the sake of western concept of sickness called “globalization”. Always remember west is on its teeth and claws to break up nuclear families, interracial marriage is one of their tricks.
You don’t know what to do because you don’t understand the difference between unity and uniformity, you went along with the diversity narrative as a basis of your analysis that benefits only one side of the coin across the society rather than taking in consideration the different social realities in place. When you try to make everyone equal at all time, in our case, by being just Muslim, we’ll try to find points of differentiation that makes who we are sooner or later, leading to conflicts and divorces because despite all the sacrifices, one of the two will go silent to please their partner but for how long ? Blue and red birds are still birds but they don’t fly together for a reason, Allah created them like that and is a reminder to us that everything can’t be mixed as there is more than just the religion to choose within a partner and in life in general. The world is changing for sure and not really going into the right direction, this is what happens when parents don’t educate their kids about their history, identity and to be proud of who they are. We all associate to a tribe in a sense, therefore ask yourself why are we so many but so disorganized ?
I’ve heard all excuses to defend this behavior, all of those excuses aren’t good to be honest except one. The excuse I’m talking about usually says “our parents are just trying to protect us, this is their duty and they seek the best for us”. Yes this is a good excuse. Parents are tasked with this and it’s good for parents to be a little strong towards a person they don’t know. However, it should never be about race, caste or ethnicity or culture or tribe. Neither of those things will benefit you on the day of Qiyamah. Now, should you consider some of those things? Yes for example race, ethnicity and caste should never even be an issue or skin color. But things like culture and tribe perhaps but to an extent. You can’t just deny someone of a different culture outright, this is not correct. But if you feel that persons culture is in some serious way going to affect the daughters faith then go ahead and speak to the potential spouse and your daughter about the issue. It’s simple as taking about it. Also as for tribe, tribal intermarriage might not take place if both tribes are at war with each other, and only thay situation should be taken to consideration. Look, point is, parents can be strict but don’t over do it. You will end up creating rancor in your daughters heart and make it hard because of your overzealous attitude towards marriage. And then you will have to answer to Allah all mighty in the end why your daughter became depressed or displeased in life. Be strict, but be open minded, follow the Quran and Sunnah and avoid the inventions of people and shaytan.
It bothers me to the core that these restrictions are placed on people who should be following the actual sunnah & not the ignorant rules of tribalism which runs rampant amongst the ummah and it all boils down to pure racism without sugar coating it. Its sad that people are not judging the person on their deen but rather their race & in my personal opinion I dont believe Allah(SWT) is pleased with this at all especially at the rate it is happening. We need to understand that if you are practicing this ignorance it is leading to people doing zinah because they are restricted by these ignorant practices and it is now extremely difficult to get married so keep that in mind if your mind is so locked on pleasing your tribe or your culture instead of Allah(SWT)
Am lost and my heart is heavy, I am from Nigeria and my boyfriend is from Guinea we both live in France, right now we decided to get married but my parents are against it because he isn’t from my country and they can’t communicate with him or his family because he only speaks French and his dialect whereas as a Nigerian we only speak English and our dialect now this is really complicated but my heart is so heavy
Love, ” halalize”. Communication, understanding and compromise is key to helping our kids in choosing a husband/wife. Fighting will push them away and perhaps into the arms of someone who truly is not best for them, not because of their race, caste, background etc., just a bad person with a hidden agenda.
Is the following an authentic hadith? I found it online; Abu Dawood reported from Jaabir ibn ‘Abd-Allaah who said: “Abu Quhaafah was brought on the day of the Conquest of Makkah, and his head and beard were like thughaamah (a plant whose leaves and flowers are intensely white) because they were so white. The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: ‘Change this white hair, but avoid black.’” (Reported by Muslim, al-Nisaa’i and Ibn Maajah). Ahmad, Abu Dawood and al-Nisaa’i reported from Ibn ‘Abbaas (may Allaah be pleased with him) who said: “The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: ‘There will be a people at the end of time who will dye their hair black like the crops of pigeons; they will not even smell the fragrance of Paradise.’” But it is encouraged to change grey or white hair by dyeing it any other colour except black, because of the hadeeth of Jaabir quoted above. It is permitted to dye the hair with henna or any other substance that will give it a reddish or yellowish colour, because it is reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used to dye his hair with yellow. Muslim reported that Abu Bakr dyed his hair with henna and katam and that ‘Umar used to dye his hair with henna. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) also said, “The best things with which you can change this grey hair are henna and katam.” Please advise if above is correct
I am English and I married an Egyptian woman, her mother had passed away and her father had dementia . Her only close relatives where her sisters, I decided to revert to Islam and feel it was the best thing I did, her family accepted me and are very loving and I love her family including her cousins, and they love me. We have been married 15 years.
I’m an African American revert, finding a spouse has proven to be the most difficult test though I’ve had several proposals their families were against it. I gave up trying after years of experiencing this and have chosen to remain single and I’m ok with that😊. Just grateful that Allah doesn’t test me in the ways many single Muslims struggle
As long as i like mufti menk, marrying inside your community is not haram at all and can be considered a good thing if you care about the cultural differences being a problem. I know some mixed people that don’t know what they are, they can’t find their places because they are for exemple black and europeens, and feel that they are at the same time both, and neither and that’s a problem
I am so pleased to hear what this Muslim man is saying As 95 % of the time you only hear the Bad things. I believe that How things were in only Faith And Country. Has changed So much. And No Parent can expect their children to be the behave in the same way as their parents and grandparents and great grandparents. We all have ideas for our children and we all want the best but sometimes we can suggest as a parent that they take time and that if your child Says they’re in love with a person of a different colour faith religion beliefs no beliefs that they should take time to get to know that person and you should invite them in their home so they learn about your child’s upbringing faith we can all learn from each other
My relationship had to end due to his mother and older sister. His mother told him to “get rid of her” and his sister told me to my face that their Arab race was superior and different to mine. It wasn’t enough that I would convert to Islam but I had to not only be from their country but also their particular”tribe”. Dodged a bullet there. He was forced into marrying his cousin and has a kid but does not give them any attention
Still suffering from this kind of thing mentally suffering both of us of her parents mentality thinking after of 11 years of relationship we do love eachother 😢wants to be married make halal relations wants to do nikaah sunnah but 😢😢😢😢 parents are not understanding they’ve made ego issue forcing her pressuring her torturing her mentally hurting 😢😢😢😢
How about if kids go out of religion and marry Hindu groom… How to react / saying ?? As far as I understand religion we Muslims are allowed to marry Christians or followers of all Holy Books revealed by Allah SWT…. What about Hindu…. ( groom takes shahada just for the sake of getting married to muslim bride and after that forgets and follows back to his own religion…. Is that marriage is valid as per Islam ?? Please enlighten me on this as per Islam / sunnah… Jazakallah khair
I find it disgusting how south Asians don’t let their kids marrying black Muslims. Sometimes you meet a person who is on deen and great but black and what automatically are we meant to just think no I don’t have a future because my parents will say no cos he is black?? I chose myself first tomorrow my parents won’t be there in my grave or my house. When I get divorced the community won’t come to my aid. I avoided marrying someone out of my culture once and then it never worked out with the second guy and bought me back to the first guy I rejected due to race . Today I’m battling to marry this person and parents saying no cos of race. I know that parents outlooks are good but when they just care for money dunya and nothing Islamic their opinions don’t matter to me
Intra-Muslim racism is an awful thing and it is not talked about nearly enough and handled as it should be. We all have witnessed racism in the Muslim community. When I see it I usually see African American Muslims being treated unfairly because of ignorance, preconceptions, and stereotypes and it needs to be addressed appropriately
Hey dear Mufti Ismael Menk My name is Ahmed Baba, I’m from Angola🇦🇴 and I follow since my 17 years old. I know that you are a bussy person may Allah facilitate all your task. A question bring me here and I need some answers. What is the status of childrens who were born out of marriage, what rights have they of their parents, and vice versa?? May Allah grant you ease dear Mufti. Jazakalahum el kheir ❤
My Palestinian fiancee told me I would have to become Muslim to marry him. I said I’m Christian, I wont . You stay Muslim and I’ll stay Christian (Iam English too) He said we cant. I said oh ok we cant marry then. His Mum and Dad thought it was funny because he backtracked very quickly. They had no problem with it or me 😍
There’s no such thing as marrying outside your “race” unless you’re marrying a dog, cat or some other animal species. Most of us know these are all man made constructs just like religion, and yet religion is meant to be a unifying force yet it’s the most divisive, just ahead of “race”. Some people will never get it. Just because we’re born ignorant does not mean we have to die in that same state, unfortunately many of us will. I passed by a “Jewish” cemetery several years ago, hell I’ve passed by many cemeteries in my lifetime, and I thought “even in so called death, we’re separated”. Cemeteries, a place where it shouldn’t matter what your so called race or religion is, we still practice divisiveness.
It’s not discrimination. It’s called compatibility. Anyone who is single and has never been married before can keep their opinions to themselves. First and foremost. Clearly, the ones who are defending huge differences in culture like it’s no big deal have no idea what they’re talking about. I’m not saying it can’t work, but the chances of marriage lasting are already very slim! Why would you add difficult variables into the mix??
I think this debate is rooted deeply in the teachings of your prophet Muhammad. He owned slaves and told his followers that Allah said it was fine to own them. Every time they conquered a new portion of the world they took many of the conquered as slaves. Muslims owned and traded slaves for about 1400 years. There is an entire body of Sharia law covering how slaves and masters are to interact
As salaam wa alaikum Mufti saab, I’m a mother of a 23 years old girl child. My daughter said she loved this guy and he is a Hindu by faith. Even after explaining she was not letting go. So we asked her to meet him in our home. Me and my husband spoke to him with fue respect and also said all our concerns. Politely said no to the marriage. But my daughter is sad. I can’t see her like this. What should we do about it, should we allow them to marry or not? Please give us some guidance. You are blessed with abdunace of knowledge. Kindly help us out.